Safe In Her Arms

By The Rainbow Writers

Copyright © 2003

kathleen_wolf@yahoo.com

Part Five

Buffy pushed open the door to her room. They'd managed a steady pace down the hall and as she closed the door behind them she noticed Tara breathe a small sigh of relief.

"Music?" Buffy questioned softly as she turned on only the small shaded bedside lamp.

"Would be nice." Tara encouraged as she sat down lightly on the side of the bed her eyes glancing around the bedroom. She deliberately shut out the memories of times that she had sat in her with Dawn or Willow holding them as they had wept for their dead sister and friend. They had Buffy back now and that was what mattered.

Buffy flicked on the stereo and turned the volume down as she shuffled through CD's for a moment before deciding and putting something soft on.

"I don't think we've ever been in here together." Buffy whispered as she stood in front of the blonde. She could see the memories and the emotions clouding Tara's blue eyes and it made her so sad.

"We haven't." Tara confirmed as she reached out her hands to Buffy and the Slayer filled them immediately with her own.

"I was thinking of redecorating." The Slayer commented absently. "You know, fresh paint... fresh start."

"I could help." Tara offered without really thinking.

"Maybe once we talk to everyone, and things settle a bit... we can all do it." Buffy's words breathed life into a hidden wish.

"That would be the best." Tara agreed.

"If it's too hard, we don't have to do this here, tonight." Buffy whispered leaning down to rest on her knees, she didn't want to hover over Tara. She also didn't let go of the hands she held.

"Kiss me." She answered pulling Buffy's hands a little, and opening her legs to allow the Slayer to get closer to her.

Buffy shifted the distance to be surrounded by the blonde as she pushed up and filled Tara's request instantly.

Tara closed her eyes and opened her mouth as Buffy kissed her, her hands squeezing the Slayer's fingers as she focused on the reality of the moment rather than the pain of the past. Buffy's body pressed closer as the kiss went deeper, wet mouths opening secrets to one another.

As the kiss continued Tara eased the muscles of her back, lowering herself backwards onto the mattress. The Slayer's obvious strength allowed her to shift and follow the move without strain as her body moved up and then down over the blonde's.

Tara released Buffy's hands and moved her own to the Slayer's sides, as their kissing became more a series of light pecks and then slow deep exploration. Gently Tara pushed up the Slayer's top a few centimeters.

Buffy braced her arms on the bed holding her petite body aloft slightly as they began to shy away from words. She kept kissing Tara as she felt the material being moved up her torso.

After moving the top back and forth the small distance several times, Tara pulled the cotton further up indicating clearly to the Slayer that she wanted it gone.

Buffy shifted her weight onto her knees more, making it easier for Tara to pull the shirt off of her and drop it onto the carpet near the bed.

With it gone Tara ran her hands up along Buffy's naked arms, over her shoulders, tracing over the cream straps there before tracing the line they took down her back all the while kissing and exploring her mouth and unconsciously moving her own hips up a little off the bed.

Buffy moaned slightly into the kiss, the warm hands that explored her body making her skin tingle with pleasure. The slight movement underneath her urged her to rest the light weight of her body a little more as she moved up further to straddle Tara's hips.

Momentarily Tara broke their kiss and looked up lovingly at Buffy.

"You really are beautiful." She stressed moving her hand smoothly over Buffy's back and shoulders.

"Nothing compared to you." Buffy shook her head softly as her body arched into the blonde's hands.

"Charmer." She breathed as she gave Buffy an award-wining smile.

"You bring out the lost poet in me." Buffy smiled back at her and then kissed her again.

"Lost poet?" The Wicca puzzled as she drew her hands over the front of Buffy's shoulders and traced light fingertips over the front of Buffy's satin bra.

"My English professor..." Buffy laughed slightly as her body arched again. "Did this big presentation on how so many poets were gay, bad Buffy metaphor." She felt her body press a little stronger against Tara.

"Oh many were, are." Tara agreed. "But I'll settle for you jut being my Buffy, you don't have to be my poet." She rubbed in a more focused way on Buffy's breasts.

"I don't..." Buffy moaned softly. "Think I could be much of a poet, but..." She leaned down nuzzling into Tara's neck. "I can be your Buffy." She kissed the soft flesh and slowly moved her mouth up to suck on the earlobe she'd be playing with earlier.

"Do you know how sensitive my ears are?" Tara asked as she played with the now obvious peaks beneath the satin. "Or was it just a lucky guess?"

"You try to hide them with your hair, calculated guess." Buffy breathed into her ear and licked slowly over the soft patch of flesh behind it.

"Now you see why!" She gasped when an unexpected bolt of pleasure hit the Wicca as Buffy's breath and tongue touched her making her arch off the bed. The sheer electricity of the blonde's reaction made Buffy moan and she continued to greedily lavish more attention on the sensitive flesh. "Oh Buffy." Tara gasped in pleasure, her hand cupping and massaging the Slayer's breasts a little harder as she lifted her hips off the bed and moved them around in a slow circle.

Shifting her weight onto one arm, Buffy dropped the other, as her mouth stayed fixed to Tara's neck. Slowly she placed her hand over lace again, massaging softly, enjoying the feel of Tara's quickening heartbeat and rising temperature.

"Buffy." Tara breathed the Slayer's name hotly.

"Yes?" Buffy pulled back looking into blue eyes.

"Take it off." Tara hoped the Slayer would realize she was referring to the lace bra that kept Buffy from touching her skin.

Buffy pushed her body back a bit, reluctantly easing away from the blonde's hands as she caught Tara's arms softly and pulled her up to stand at the side of the bed.

"Can we just..." Buffy breathed deeply, suddenly unsure of her own wants. "Get rid of it all and lie down?"

"Of course." Tara smiled reassuringly. She moved her hands to the fastening on the side of her calf length skirt. Buffy unfastened her pants and pushed them down kicking them back softly.

"Let me help." She stopped stood there in only her bra and matching panties as she reached around Tara to undo the second button and then slid the skirt down. She trailed her hands up Tara's back and began working on the closure to the blonde's bra.

Tara let Buffy remove her bra and then brought the Slayer's hands to rest against the strap of elastic bridging across her hips. Buffy swallowed slightly, her throat a bit dry as she curled her fingers into the material and pulled it down off the blonde. She followed it down until it slipped useless past Tara's knees and she turned her head placing a small kiss on the blonde's stomach before she stood back up.

Tara did her best not to try and cover herself up, as she stood there naked before the Slayer.

"You are so gorgeous." Buffy appraised leaning forward to kiss the blonde lightly.

"As are you." Tara slid her hands round Buffy's back and unhooked her satin bra effortlessly guiding the straps down Buffy's arms as she moved her hands back in front.

"You're good at that." Buffy gave a mischievous grin as the material slipped off her body.

"I have a technique." Tara couldn't believe she replied with a wink.

"Just another poor girl whose fallen victim to the seductive power of Tara Maclay." Buffy whispered thickly as she leaned against Tara, sliding one leg up the outside of the blonde's hip.

"These have to go." Tara stroked her finger along the waistband of Buffy's panties.

"I hope you have a technique." Buffy rested both feet on the floor again. Her body felt alive, alive and on fire.

For a brief moment Tara had to fight the desire to drop to her knees and show Buffy that she could indeed remove them without the use of her hands, but she had enough restraint to think that perhaps Buffy wasn't ready for that.

Instead she slipped her hands inside the straps of Buffy's panties where they rested low on her hips and urged the material down. She never let her hands leave the heat of Buffy's skin, all the way over her hips and down the sides of her thighs, still touching over her calves until the material dropped to the floor.

Gracefully then Tara stood back up dragging her hands back along the path they had taken on the way down, though this time she brought Buffy's left leg with her running her fingers openly along the expanse of Buffy's thigh.

The Slayer didn't even try to suppress the moan that shivered through her as Tara's hands moved over her body.

"You wanted to lay down..." Tara whispered breathing into Buffy's ear as she caressed the underside of Buffy's thigh.

"I want you to make love to me." Buffy admitted in a whisper her voice sure, though she felt butterflies of anticipation in her stomach.

"Oh yes Buffy." Tara's voice was filled with passion as she kissed the Slayer's neck and throat while she eased Buffy's leg down again. "Lay down." She directed gently.

Buffy breathed out hotly as her head tilted to one side. Her eyes closed as Tara directed her and she soon felt the cool comforter at her back as she reached the bed.

In a moment Tara took her place above the Slayer, her long legs resting between Buffy's, her body floating just above the naked one below her, her arms bracing her weight steadily. Buffy opened her eyes to the inspiring sight of Tara filling her vision.

"Buffy." Tara said lovingly as she kissed a path down the Slayer's throat and between her breasts.

"Tara." The Slayer repeated back her lover's name instantly to show she was completely attentive to all that Tara was doing.

"I love you." Tara whispered as she gently brought her hips down to press her center against Buffy's at the exact same moment that her lips closed around the flesh of Buffy's breast for the first time.

Buffy gasped from the overwhelming pleasurable shocks that shattered through her empty body and filled her head to toe.

"Oh God, I love you too." She whispered back squeezing her eyes shut as she moaned and a warm happy tear slid back over her temple into her hair.

Tara kissed in a light circle around Buffy's puckered nipple, gently dancing her hips against Buffy's center as she did so. Tipping her head slightly she let her pretty princess braids fall across Buffy's body, grazing over the heated skin as she kissed around and around, before closing her lips over the excited harden flesh.

Buffy moaned again, her hands softly coming down to cup Tara's head. Her hips pushed back against the blonde's, rocking their bodies together slightly harder.

Aware of the hands on the back of her head Tara moved her head gently against the breast she suckled, slowly increasing the pressure of her mouth and letting her tongue flick against the excited flesh. At the same time she was consciously building up more pressure between them by rotating and flexing her hips against Buffy's.

A jump or shiver in the Slayer's body met each movement of her tongue and Tara could help but whimper slightly in pleasure. On automatic Buffy's hips shifted more open and she linked one leg around Tara's thighs pulling her closer. As she felt the Slayer capture her Tara had to fight the urge to release her lover's capture breast and cry out in pleasure.

Buffy felt as if she was in a dream, her body was alive with pleasure and feeling. Every inch of her was completely aroused and her mind swelled with the feelings she had for Tara. All of them solidified by this act of love between them.

Tara couldn't help but release a low groan as she felt her center brush firmly against Buffy's, a fiery wave of arousal filling her lower body as she focused on pressing against that specific area.

The Slayer's hips rocked faster and harder against the blonde's body as the wetness between her legs grew.

"Tara." Buffy moaned out her name as she reacted to the blonde's discovery of how to contact the most aroused and sensitive part of her body.

Lifting one hand off the mattress Tara answered the Slayer's moan not with words but by sliding her hand between their bodies as she made a long sensual rotation of her hips. By the time her center pressed against Buffy's again Tara's hand was lightly cupped the Slayer's hot flesh. Her long thin fingers eased through damp hair and entered swollen heated lips, as she began to brush over and over in time with her hip movements.

"Tara." Buffy moaned again, opening her eyes blinking at the overwhelming pleasure that slid over her skin with the blonde's touch. Buffy's body rocked, pressing into each movement greedily.

Releasing Buffy's nipple the Wicca looked up at the Slayer so that Buffy could see the desire that filled her blue eyes.

"Warm." Tara whispered putting more pressure into the rub of her fingers, which she eased further down and around within Buffy's wetness.

"Hot." Buffy whispered her mouth opening in another moan.

Letting her middle finger graze between the outer lips of Buffy's body, Tara swore if she had not been laying down she would have fallen as she felt Buffy's heat and wetness fully for the first time. She just let her fingers press back and forth through it, over and over, her hips moving stronger, a low impassioned noise escaping from her throat as she made each loving stroke.

The Slayer's hips flattened out as her body arched into the touch. Sliding her hands down over Tara's shoulders, she pressed her palms full into the blonde's breasts wanting to feel her all of her lover that she could.

"Oh Buffy, Buffy!" Tara moaned as she let her fingers explore more in their slick environment, opening and exploring the blood rich skin. She placed the pad of her finger lightly on the tight bundle of nerves inside the Slayer's body.

"Oh Tara." Buffy whispered as the touch made her body jump and she realized as her eyes closed again that she was racing towards release quicker than she'd ever imagined. She tightened her fingertips around the blonde's nipples, squeezing softly in rhythm to the movement of Tara's finger over her center.

Moving in a fast controlled vibrating motion, Tara focused on making Buffy feeling everything she possibly could. Her fingers never left Buffy's excited flesh as in a seamless move she replaced her finger with her thumb and she let her finger press deeper discovering the font of Buffy's arousal.

The blonde almost found her breath taken away as she felt Buffy's tight contractions on her middle finger and she pressed carefully but firmly.

"Yes, baby yes." Tara breathed as her finger flicked against flexing muscles urging Buffy closer to release.

It had only taken Tara entering her, just the knowledge of knowing she was Tara's, that everything was Tara's now. She wasn't really sure if she screamed, or just moaned. She did focus on pushing out words as she told Tara over and over again that she loved her. She focused on the love cause that was what she felt, coursing through her muscles and nerves with a vivid intensity.

Tara couldn't believe the beauty that was Buffy as she let herself be engulfed by her feelings and climax. The flood around her fingers that spilled over down her hand nearly was enough to tip her over the edge, but she carefully concentrated on bringing Buffy down to a place of comfort.

"I love you too." She purred, letting her fingers leave the Slayer's body to stroke through her wetness as she leaned down and kissed Buffy on the lips.

Buffy opened her eyes again as Tara's lips left hers. She blinked slowly as her body slowed just a little bit, and small tears squeezed out of her eyes.

"Hey, hey." Tara changed her lean, shifting her weight from her hand to her elbow, freeing one hand so that she could reach her fingers to wipe away a stray tear.

"It's okay." Buffy whispered with a slow luscious smile. "I love you too." She added softly.

"Here let me stop this." Tara gradually slowed the movements of her fingers below.

"No, it's not that." Buffy reached up brushing fingers down Tara's cheek. "Just... wow." She managed feeling speechless.

"The first time should be good." Tara blushed a little but her smile was stunning.

"And the second?" Buffy smiled back.

"Better." Tara's smile turned into an unbelievable grin.

Buffy leaned up and kissed her trying to show the Wicca how amazing she felt.

Tara had to fight not to begin her hand and hip movements again as the taste and heat of Buffy's mouth reminded her of her own barely restrained passion. Buffy kissed the blonde deeper encircling her with her arms as she pulled her lover into a tight embrace.

"Mmmmm." Tara moaned into the kiss, her elbow slipping sideways making her more or less topple onto the Slayer for the first time pressing her weight down on Buffy's body.

"Mmmmm better." Buff moaned into the kiss, her flushed slightly sweaty skin loving the feel of the bare skin now against her.

"I-I-I don't want to be to heavy..." Tara began as she pulled back her mouth momentarily.

"You're not." Buffy ran her hands down the blonde's back, so very pleased when it made Tara arch into her harder.

"Mmmm, I have this back thing too." Tara tried to explain as she moaned and shivered at Buffy's touch.

"So if I do this..." Buffy questioned mischievously as she let her manicured nails ever so softly run down to the swell of Tara's backside then back up to the dip of her lower back.

"I'd… Ah..." Tara's back flared against Buffy's body.

"Mmmm." Buffy moaned as the move caused Tara to press their hips together again.

The Wicca slipped her hand out from between their hot bodies and pressed it flat on the mattress as Buffy repeated the motion. Tara's back arched harder than before this time sending center back against center causing her to moan louder and catch the edge of her lip as she did so.

Buffy kissed her again as she ran her hands down over Tara's behind, palming the warm rounded flesh and pulling the blonde closer. Tara moved under Buffy's directions, control becoming a commodity she was fast loosing.

Slowly Buffy released the grip she had still been holding on Tara's lower legs, and curled one hand down between their bodies. She pulled back out of the kiss, wanting to see exactly how this made Tara feel as she let out a little moan when her fingers reached the edge of moist blonde curls.

Tara's blue eyes flared wide open, flooding with desire and need. Again her teeth gripped the corner of her lip as she groaned in pleasure. Slowly, only because Buffy couldn't believe the heat that flared out of the blonde's body, she brought her hand down further and ran a fingertip over the wetness that dripped out to meet her.

"I'm a little…" Tara began not sure if she was apologizing, explaining or just stating the obvious.

"For me?" Buffy questioned in disbelief as she took a staggered breath, she ran her finger along the blonde's outer lips again.

"For you." Tara wasn't sure how she managed to verbally confirm it.

"Can I?" Buffy questioned softly before pressing deeper.

Tara leaned down and answered Buffy with a kiss of consent. As the blonde's tongue pressed warmly into her mouth, Buffy let her fingers slip inside Tara.

The pool of hot wet that met her made her whimper, and she doubted she could have ever prepared herself for the rush of sensation the discovery caused. For a moment her fingers moved slowly to discover the hidden folds of Tara's body, almost as if the physicality of it was new to her in every sense and not just that it was Tara.

Tara sucked and toyed with Buffy's tongue as she moved her hips a little encouraging Buffy's fingers to explore.

Soon it all became about Tara as Buffy ran her fingertip over a harder area of flesh and felt the blonde's hips jump into her. She focused her fingers there, rubbing in a tight circle over Tara's center.

"Mmmm." Tara's moan was passionate as her hips rocked above Buffy's body. She closed her eyes as colors danced brightly in her head and flames of desire licked up inside her.

Easily able to shift Tara's body weight, Buffy moved one leg between Tara's so that Tara could open her legs more. Her fingers danced over the blonde's center, shifting between movements and pressure as she watched the pleasured changes on Tara's face.

Tara let herself enjoy the newfound space and movement, before feeling her position shift slightly. Her legs closed around Buffy's thigh, almost claiming it as hers as she changed her hip movements into a forward and back motion.

Buffy quickly followed the set pattern with her fingers and she slid her hand up and down, Tara's center caught slightly between two fingers.

"Oh..." Tara's breath caught in her throat and turned into a rather ragged pant. "Buffy." Her hips moved faster.

"Yes?" Buffy questioned thickly feeling desire building in her stomach again as the blonde's knee pressed up into her.

"This is..." She gasped pushing hard onto Buffy's thigh. "You are…" She pushed her hands flat down on the mattress pushing her upper body off the Slayer, but her lower body down closer. "Amazing." She managed to finish as she moved in her new position.

"And you are beautiful." Buffy whispered speeding up her push and pull slightly. She could hardly believe how beautiful the blonde above her did look.

Tara: Consumed by passion and desire, free of all feeling of insecurity that often cruelly plagued her, and free to feel and be as beautiful as she really was.

"I don't want to stop." Tara admitted her face flushed and her body damp with sweat and heat.

"Don't... please." Buffy added in a whisper leaning her head up to kiss the blonde's body, her lips trailing over her collarbone and the tops of her breasts.

Tara closed her eyes and arched her back hard letting her breasts move freely as she rocked against Buffy's leg and hand, tipping her head to the side her breathing changed to harder fast pants.

Buffy slowly brought her free hand up, cupping it around the blonde's ample breast as she dipped her head further. She was easily able to remember how good this had felt when Tara was touching her, and without hesitation she closed her warm lips over the rosy pink nipple and sucked gently.

"Buffy!" Tara called out as without warning she toppled over the edge of her climax the instant the Slayer latched lightly to her breast. A warm flood rolled out of her onto Buffy's heated skin.

The Slayer would wonder to herself in later moments why it all had seemed such a surprise, the flood of liquid, the feel of spasming muscles and the hoarse luscious way that Tara called her name. Moved on by it all she sucked harder, her fingers moving faster. She wanted more of this amazing reaction.

Tara had more to give, hardly pausing the Wicca met Buffy's new faster harder rhythm. Her breath sounded out louder in the hot room, her body's movements bigger and more exaggerated.

Buffy was edged on even further, what she knew she lacked in experience she tried to make up for in desire as she slid her fingers quicker over Tara's center. She licked her tongue in circles around the nipple she'd captured, deciding now she completely understood the whole breast fetish.

In some part of her brain Tara thought she should be touching Buffy, letting her know just how much of an effect she was having on her and returning the favor but she couldn't move. She just kept her back arched hard and her whole body moving.

Using a little slayer strength, Buffy bent the leg that Tara had captured up, effectively raising her up and bounced the blonde to increase the movement.

"Yesss!" Tara managed a coherent word to let the Slayer know that the move was both appreciated and needed.

Buffy smiled against the flesh she devoured as Tara confirmed she'd done something good. Deciding quickly to continue with instinct, she pressed her hand down further taking a deep breath as she pressed one finger inside the blonde.

"Oh Buffy." Tara's words were followed by a long groan as she pushed back.

"Is that okay?" Buffy checked a little thrown by the blonde's reaction. She felt ribs of muscles flinch and flex around her.

"Oh yes." Tara purred, controlling her inner muscles to stretch and grip around Buffy. "See." She added deliberately lock and releasing Buffy's finger.

"Oh my God." Buffy gasped in excitement at the feeling.

"T-T-Try a-a-another." Tara's stutter so obviously wasn't from nervousness this time as she made the suggestion, she also opened her blue eyes and gave Buffy a lop-sided grin.

"I don't want to hurt you." Buffy admitted stupidly, their bodies still rocking as she held the blonde aloft.

"You won't." Tara promised.

Buffy nodded softly and shifted her hand a bit more to slip a second finger inside Tara's tight body.

"Sweet Goddess!" Tara's teeth caught her lip again as she opened for Buffy ensuring her body remained tight around Buffy but relaxed enough for the Slayer to feel how good it felt.

"You are." Buffy groaned as the closed her eyes briefly feeling the way the blonde's body accepted and was excited by her.

"Take me Buffy." Tara breathed knowing she was far to close to orgasm to continue talking much longer.

Buffy felt frozen for a moment before she pulled her fingers back and began moving quickly in and out of the blonde, her leg kept Tara off the bed and let them rock in a hard long motion. She breathed hotly onto the wet skin before her before again sucking hard flesh into her mouth. Pushing deeper, Buffy worked her palm in flat and pressed up against the blonde's center as they moved.

"That's it, so good." Tara whispered the hoarse words of encouragement while she still could before giving into the explosion of her release.

Tara bucked and writhed with Buffy, a light sheen of sweat covering her body. It soaked out into her hair as she rode wave after wave of release. Her heart hammered in her ears and her breath rushed out of her lungs in hot uneven pants. The Wicca feared for a moment that she might pass out.

"Bu... Bu… Buffy." She panted.

As Tara's breathing became more erratic, Buffy slowed down their movement. Within a few rocks she had the blonde again resting heavy on top of her on the bed. She stilled her hand and leaned back from the blonde's breast. Buffy felt the press of Tara's body against her heaving in each hard breath. Every so slowly Buffy pulled her hand back, and hugged Tara close to her, softly stroking the length of her lover's back.

Tara let herself rest against Buffy as everything slowly adjusted itself back to normal.

"Sleepy?" Tara asked after a long moment, knowing that sleeping had been hard for the Slayer since her return from the grave. She drew small circles on Buffy's stomach.

"Yes." Buffy whispered realizing it was true as she held onto the blonde, both of their bodies pushed past the point of frenzied excitement to a calmer steady bliss.

"Buffy…" Tara whispered her voice serious as she sat up a little and looked at her new lover.

"Yes?" Buffy opened her eyes again. A moment of panic threatened to hit her with the tone in Tara's voice.

"How did that make you feel?" Tara's tone dropped to a soothing query. She wanted Buffy to know she was not about to change the world or the rules on her.

"You know how it made me feel." Buffy felt a slow smile spread on her face as the threat vanished. "I love you." She added in a whisper.

"I know you do, and I love you too." Tara whispered. "Welcome back."

"I'm sorry about the..." Buffy put a hand up to her face wiping at long dried tears as her mind caught up.

"The tears?" Tara checked they were talking about the same thing.

"Yes." The Slayer nodded. "I don't, well I never used to, and I certain haven't really since..." She realized she was babbling and laughed a little relaxing.

"Tears are fine Buffy." Tara soothed gently. "As is laughter."

"You bring out the best in me." Buffy admitted rubbing her hand softly over the blonde's arm.

"I think we do it for each other." Tara smiled.

"You tired?" Buffy asked softly.

"Mmmm a little." Tara admitted.

"Under covers?" Buffy noted realizing they were still on top of the comforter.

"We might cool down if we don't." Tara reasoned.

"Like warm." Buffy admitted kissing the blonde lightly.

"It's a good feeling huh?" Tara agreed.

"Mmmm amazing." She smiled kissing the blonde lightly again.

"Two second shift-a-roo then." Tara giggled. "Bet I can beat you back."

"From where?" Buffy giggled with her.

"From the top to underneath." Tara clarified.

"Go." Buffy giggled and they began scrambling.

Very, very gradually the need to use the bathroom drew Tara from her restful slumber, and even when it had gotten to the point that it couldn't really be ignored any longer, she still remained lying in the soft sheets. The reason, of course, was Buffy. The sleepy Slayer was sprawled over most of Tara's body, her head resting on Tara's left breast, her arm flung over the rest of her stomach, while her leg was thrown over Tara's thighs. Though there was no pressure and no restraint involved in the position, Tara simply didn't want to move. Buffy was as beautiful asleep as she was awake.

The blonde Wicca had come to the decision a while ago, during the hours she had spent resting on a sleeping Willow: A sleeping woman was a thing of extra special beauty. Buffy sealed the thought firmly in her head. All the gently creases of worry, pain and confusion were gone while the Slayer slept, her young face perfect in its serenity and poise.

"I love you Buffy Summers." Tara whispered tracing her fingertips around Buffy's ear and threading them through into her hair.

Buffy gave a soft gentle moan as Tara touched her, though she didn't wake.

"This world hasn't treated either of us right, but at least now we've found each other." Tara mused. "I just hope I can be what you need." She added drawing her fingers over and over through the silky locks. "And I hope Willow will understand." She added her voice dropping a notch as she though of the redhead.

Tara found her thoughts spiraling away from her a little and made a conscious effort to rein them in. This wasn't the time or the place to be thinking about anything other than Buffy and the love that they shared. The rest would be dealt with in time, and dealt with the right way, together.

Buffy's body shifted a little as she began to wake up, emerging slowly and peacefully into consciousness.

"Mmmm." She made a soft content noise as she blinked her eyes open and yawned.

"Hey limpet." Tara said lovingly She leaned down and kissed the Slayer lightly on the forehead.

"Limpet?" Buffy yawned again smiling as she lifted her head a little.

Tara moved her hand to lift Buffy's from her waist and kicked up her legs to show her that she was effectively pinning Tara down.

"Oh God I'm sorry." Buffy blushed and began pulling away.

"Hey, hey no." Tara rubbed Buffy's arms gently. "It's lovely, there's just this teeny weenie bladder issue."

"I'm just a selfish sleeper." Buffy smiled as she fully disentangled herself now for the purpose of letting Tara go to the bathroom.

"Thank you." Tara slipped out of the bed, and bent down to pick up her skirt from the floor, looking around for her blouse.

"Robe?" Buffy pointed to the one slung over the footboard of the bed.

"Thank you." Tara chuckled softly and dropped her skirt picking up the robe. She wrapped it round her body and slipped out of the room.

Though Buffy wished the Wicca would walk across the room naked so she could enjoy the stunning morning view, she knew she couldn't deny the blonde the robe.

Buffy shifted over onto her back and doubled one of the pillows under her head. Finding her pajamas under there, she pulled the small short T-shirt on, laughing to herself at the little sleepy sheep that were printed on it. Not the sexiest thing she owned but it was closer than getting out of the warm bed and going to the closet. She didn't even think to put on the shorts.

"Now I can say good morning." Tara announced softly as she padded back into the bedroom. The robe fastened around her body was very short and it ended prematurely on her mid-thigh.

"It's chilly." Buffy smiled and patted her spot in bed.

"Its that a plea for the Tara heater to get back into bed?" Tara asked as she crossed over to the bed, her smile warm and broad.

"Yes." Buffy nodded and held the bedclothes up for her to slip in and Tara moved quickly to retake her place. "Good morning." She waited until Tara was settled before leaning in to softly kiss her lover.

"Good morning." Tara received the kiss with a smile. "What do you want for breakfast?" She added putting her arm around Buffy's back and offering the Slayer her previous spot on her chest.

Buffy smiled broadly as her first answer popped into her head.

"Okay what's so amusing?" Tara questioned seeing the instant grin.

"My first cheeky answer, which surprised even me." Buffy admitted leaning over on Tara slightly.

"Should I be asking to be told what that was?"

"I woke up this morning..." Buffy's smiled softened. "And for the first time the first thing I felt wasn't how bright and cold the world was because it was warm." She kissed the blonde's lips softly. "It was soft." She kissed her again. "And the first thing I remembered wasn't waking up in a coffin." Her voice dropped a little though she didn't let them darken her. "It was remembering what it felt like to make love to you." She held blue eyes. "And I realized what I wanted for breakfast was to make love to you again." She admitted.

"Oh Buffy." Tara squeezed her gently. "I am sure I am not the first lover to tell you this but…" She paused and traced her fingers over Buffy's face. "You say the nicest things."

"I'm not trying to be nice." Buffy said honestly needing the blonde to know that it wasn't some line. "And everything in the universe isn't perfect, it probably never will be but..." She stopped trying to order her thoughts. "I can look past it all."

"And how does it look, when you look past it all?" Tara asked gently. "What do you see?"

"A reason to fight again, a reason to face things." Buffy admitted. "A reason to put away all the pain, not ignore it, but not focus on it. It'll always be there, but it always doesn't have to be the first thing."

"No, it doesn't." Tara rewards the Slayer's words with a kiss.

"I'm doing introspective Buffy again aren't I?" The Slayer smiled and received her kiss.

"Yes, and its not a bad thing, only a slightly worrying thing to do on an empty stomach." Tara winked at her.

"Let's get you some breakfast." Buffy kissed her again lightly.

"We could eat out for breakfast." Tara could hardly believe she had made the suggestion: going out, being in a public place when she didn't have to be.

"I would love that." Buffy kissed her again. "Show you off." Tara blurted out a laugh.

"Show me off?" She questioned the Slayer's phrase.

"Though someone has convinced you to the contrary Tara Maclay." Buffy leaned up over her. "You are a beautiful stunningly attractive woman."

"Hardly, I just manage some how to date them." Tara beamed.

"Charmer." Buffy kissed her again.

"I'm famished." Buffy laughed as she finished the last mouthful of waffle from the 'mile high' stack she'd ordered. "I can't remember ever being that hungry." She laughed again as she surveyed the empty plate that had one held a lumberjack breakfast. The restaurant they had chosen was one of those large all night places, which meant good food, inattentive company and the chance to watch the light Saturday morning traffic through the window. "Did you want something else?"

"No I think two sunny side up eggs, whole wheat toast and then a following of maple syrup pancakes is enough for this little Wicca." Tara shook her head and picked up her glass of chilled apple juice taking a sip.

"Good." Buffy nodded happy that the blonde was full. "Did you want to go shopping or something?" She reached across the small table and laced her fingers into Tara's.

"We could, I've been meaning to buy myself a new skirt." Tara mused playing with Buffy's fingers.

"Sounds perfect." Buffy didn't know what possessed her but she brought the blonde's hand up and kissed it.

Unfortunately it was at the same time that Xander banged on the glass next to them to get their attention. His good morning smile turning into one of slightly startled shock. Tara didn't mean too, but she couldn't stop the instant pull of her hand to reclaim it tightly to her body.

"Xander." Buffy breathed out his name as her eyes registered who it was and her brain confirmed he was the only Scooby left in Sunnydale.

"Xander." Tara whispered her head dropping to examine the plastic topped table.

The young man seemed to look at them for a moment not believing his eyes before he waved and scampered around and entered the restaurant quickly coming over to the table.

"Hey guys, fancy seeing you here." His voice was tight and nervous as he obviously attempted to banish what he was thinking from his mind. "All with the eating and the chatting." He added looking between the two young woman and the plates surrounding them.

Buffy watched Tara crawling back into her shell quickly and she just couldn't stand it.

"Look Xander, it's okay. We were going to tell everyone this week." She looked at him and spoke point blank.

"Tell everyone about your secret breakfast eating obsession?" Xander deliberately played the joker.

"Xander." Buffy shook her head slowly, it would be so easy at this moment to retreat and play dumb as well. He was giving her every opportunity but as she looked at the blonde again, who seemed to be trying to hide back into the chair, she couldn't. "More the hand kissage and the fact I love Tara."

"Hey it's okay, we all love Tara." He spontaneously put his arm around Tara and squeezed the unsuspecting Wicca into his side. "She's a great gal. Yep we love our Tara."

"Xander." Buffy looked at Tara who seemed startled by the move. "For Christ sake Xander." She looked at him. "I'm not joking here, I'm trying to talk to you."

"Talk, Talk." Xander's voice dropped a notch and he released Tara. "Sorry Buffy." He said putting his hands together on the tabletop.

"I'm in love with Tara." Buffy shifted for a minute uncomfortably before speaking again. "And for the first time since the resurrection, I'm happy."

Xander took an obvious slow deep breath in as he glanced between the two girls.

"You and Tara. Swinging with the Wicca lifestyle?" He asked in his own way for confirmation on what he was hearing.

"Watch your mind little man." Buffy gave him a short glare. "But yes, Tara and I."

"Wow Buff." Xander flexed his shoulders a bit and looked at his friend. "I'm with the wow here, but I'm kinda thinking Willow." He felt he had to admit where his mind had instantly gone.

Tara's head dropped even lower as the Wicca began believing that having eaten breakfast was a bad idea.

"We didn't mean this to happen Xander, but it did." Buffy frowned slightly at the mention of her best friend's name. "Neither of us wants to hurt her."

"Hey if you're happy Buffy then I'm not against this, you too Tara." Xander added. "It's just you know…" He rubbed his brow. "Kinda mind blowing. How long have you two been you know?" He wiggled his hand a bit.

"Not long." Buffy gave him a tiny glare to watch himself. "And before you start thinking it this had nothing to do with..." She glanced at Tara again cursing herself for not dragging him aside and getting most of this out of the way.

"I… I think maybe I should go." Tara suddenly announced.

"No, no Tara." Buffy reached out again taking her hand as it dropped the napkin off her lap onto the table.

"No Tara." Xander echoed. "Like the Buffster said none of this has been done to hurt anyone, we don't get to choose who we…" He swallowed before added. "Fall in love with. Hey hands up who thinks I would have chosen a vengeance demon?" He tried to interject some brevity again.

"And if you met Cordelia you'd see how that was a step up for him." Buffy added anxiously. Tara did actually raise her head a little at the line of jokes.

"Hey Buff, why don't you go and see if you can get me a coffee to go?" He motioned with his head towards the counter. Buffy looked between him and Tara for a minute, before dejectedly doing what he asked. Xander waited till the Slayer was out of earshot before he spoke again. "Are you in love with her?" He asked quietly. "I'm asking Tara cause I don't think you're capable of the obvious angry revenge thing, so this isn't about getting back at Willow." He added when she didn't answer.

"I love her, yes." Tara replied her voice clear and gentle.

"Are you still in love with Willow?" Xander questioned keeping his voice gentle as well. Tara's bottom lip trembled and her brow furrowed as Xander asked the hard questions.

"She broke my heart." The Wicca replied simply but with great volume of emotion.

"Tara, I moved the boxes remember? I know leaving Willow was the hardest thing you ever did." Xander tried to show he understood. "But you still love her don't you?"

"W-W-W-W…" Tara had to give up her first attempt at saying the redhead's name drawing in a distressed breath. She glanced off to the ceiling before looking back at Xander. "I won't hurt Buffy." She stated her voice trembling.

"She's not done great in the whole love department Tara, I know you know that." He pointed out feeling every part the loyal best friend. "And I'm not sure exactly how Wills is going to take this but..." He rubbed his hand through his hair. "I'll do my best to help smooth it all out."

"Xander…" Tara began wishing that she had more strength and more control but she knew that for something things she never would have. "I love Willow, she is the most precious thing, but…" She had to stop to prevent herself from crying. "But I can't be with someone who would use me and not even think twice. I let my f-f-father beat me black and b-b-blue for thirteen years b-b-because he could, b-b-because I didn't have the strength to stop him. I left Willow because she gave me the strength too. She loved me enough to l-l-let me love myself. How could I not love her? B-B-But I can't b-b-be with her."

"I don't know how you could be Tara." Xander admitted a little introspectively. "I've never been betrayed like that... like ever." He frowned. "At first I didn't understand why you left her." He continued playing with his hands. "Then when the whole invisible Buffy thing happened." He didn't even stop to realize that might not be a tale Tara knew. "And I jumped to the conclusion that it was one of her spells gone awry things, I know I was wrong for assuming it was her. But the way she reacted to the question, as if it was still such a mystery to her why anyone would doubt her, as if she hadn't done anything wrong. I understood then." He looked at the blonde. "I think she believes we're telling her the truth when we tell her the magic is wrong, but I'm not sure she believes it herself yet."

"Xander." For the first time the blonde Wicca actually looked at the young man. "It's not just about the magic. You must swear Xander, you won't tell anyone this." Tara's eye flickered nervously over to where Buffy stood chatting to the assistant who fussed with the coffee machine. "Especially not Buffy, not now."

"I promise." He nodded.

"When my mother died." Tara picked up her discarded serviette and pulled it back towards her body. "My father…" She looked down and subconsciously began shredding the small paper square. "My father was scared and angry and lost, and he..." Tara took a breath and Xander listened patiently for her to continue. "He decided I w-w-was the reason it had h-h-happened, and that I sh-sh-should be punished." Her sad haunted blue eyes flickered briefly up to look at him.

Nothing but anger and disbelief flooded back from Xander who just couldn't understand how another man would hit his own daughter.

"That punishment put me in hospital Xander." Tara looked away again.

"It wasn't your fault Tara." He underlined immediately.

"Maybe." She shrugged.

"It wasn't, that would be like blaming Dawn." He reasoned. "It was just a horrible tragedy."

"But I decided that even if it was, I wasn't ever going to let him do that to me again. So when he came to pick me up I told him that and he swore, he promised on my Mother's life that he'd not do it again." Tara didn't comment further on the issue of blame. "I gave him a month. A month where he could not hit me, not abuse me for a month, he or Donny, and if they made a month then I'd stay." Her voice dropped to a tiny whisper.

Her phrasing made a sick feeling enter Xander's stomach as an overheard fight at his apartment sounded in his ears again.

"He managed three days." Tara's blue eyes leaked precious tears down her cheeks. Xander frowned and swallowed back down the bile that pushed up in the back of his throat. "Three days before he bruised and nearly broke one of my barely healed ribs. Willow swore Xander. She promised me." Tears flowed down her face as something inside her broke a little. "I h-h-h-have to go." She dropped the shredded remains of her paper tissue on the table and more or less ran.

"What the hell did you do?" Buffy got back to the table just in time to slam the coffee down and bark at him.

"I didn't do anything." Xander jumped back as hot coffee spilled out of the lidded container onto his lap.

"I have to go." Buffy looked at the door Tara had ran out of. She pulled money out of her pocket and hastily threw it on the table.

"Buffy…" Xander called as he watched the Slayer's movements noting how she had that fire, that intensity about her that had been lacking for some time.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt Willow." She turned slightly backing away. "But I... I can't be dead inside anymore." She admitted to him.

Xander had no words he just dropped his head and looked down at the shredded paper tissue and the scattered coins. He wished that he'd had the chance to make things better instead of worse.

Buffy hit the outside and did a three sixty trying to spot where Tara had gone. Taking off in one direction she hoped her instincts were right. She was rewarded when she soon saw the blonde's figure cutting through the sidewalk crowd by a fruit market.

"Tara!" She yelled chasing her with a sense of panic.

Tara didn't want to continue running, she wanted to stop and fall into Buffy's arms, but she couldn't, it was all too public and to open. The feelings inside were too raw for a public display. She cut off quickly down a side street, not even sure where it took her.

Buffy followed, her slayer speed making it easy to catch up with the blonde.

"Tara, wait." She found the blonde slowing as they emerged in a back alley behind the shops.

Tara's feet came to a gradual stop as she wrapped her arms low around her waist in a classic withdrawn Tara pose.

"Please, whatever he said, I'm sorry." Buffy breathed hard, not from the running but from the pain that she felt seeing Tara so withdrawn. "He's Xander, he has a big mouth sometimes but he knows we would never purposely hurt Willow. He knows you wouldn't hurt her on purpose."

"It wasn't Xander." Tara shook her head knowing that she couldn't lay the blame on the dark haired young man she liked so much.

"I'm sorry, I thought you wanted everyone to know." Buffy stepped back realizing horrified it might of been her words.

"I do, oh Buffy it wasn't you." Tara caught sight of the Slayer's small retreat.

"Then what?" Buffy questioned her needing something else to blame. Needing something to blame, something she could fix and make go away so everything was okay again.

"Me." Tara whispered blinking more tears down her wet, and now chilled face.

"You don't want this?" Buffy felt the question whistle out of her suddenly dry mouth.

"No, no, I want this. Buffy I want this so much." Tara shook her head and looked up. "I want you." She added reaching out her hand to Buffy.

Buffy's tension relaxed a little as her biggest fear was wiped away momentarily and she reached out taking the hand offered. The connection of their clasped hands instantly made her feel a bit better, though the tears on her lover's cheeks still distressed her.

"I th-th-think there might be th-th-things, things I need to tell you." Tara made the attempt to explain.

"I can listen." Buffy soothed her coming closer and reaching up to brush tears away.

"Can we go h-h-home, this isn't going to be easy." Tara made the shy sad request.

Buffy held Tara tightly from behind, her legs and arms hugged around the blonde's shaking body. She barely noticed that it was starting to get dim out as the dusk approached. The day had gone by in a horrible blur of stories that made the Slayer's heart bleed with anger and sorrow.

Tara had cried herself out long before the Slayer had, but Buffy had held onto her the whole time urging her to tell it all, whatever she needed to, whatever she wanted too. The abuse at the hands of her father for so many years, melted seamlessly into the mental abuse Willow had forced upon her and for the first time Buffy truly understood the ramifications of what the hacker had done.

It wasn't just a spell, it wasn't just a mistake, it had been a calculated and carefully executed move to make it so Willow was in control. A spell to make it so Willow didn't have to feel bad about her actions, didn't have to atone for her mistakes. In short it was abuse, and Buffy could hardly believe now how Tara had found the strength to leave her.

"I'm sorry I didn't stop her." Buffy whispered knowing it wouldn't be something the blonde wanted to hear, but it was something she needed to say.

"You couldn't have, by then it wasn't Willow in control, it was magic, just like with Pa, it wasn't him, it was the anger." Tara answered sadly her heart and body aching.

"It's still her responsibility." Buffy ran her hand over Tara's hair, tucking it behind her hair.

"But perhaps it was partially my fault." Tara whispered she curled up a little tighter seeking comfort, warmth and solace in Buffy's arms.

"No, no." The Slayer stated firmly.

"If I… if Glory..." Tara stammered.

"Glory is to blame for what Glory did Tara." Buffy held her and rocked slightly. "And Willow did what she had to do to save you, but it could have ended there, she didn't have to let it become all consuming."

"Sometimes it hurts even to look at her Buffy." Tara whispered her voice tiny and child like. Buffy kissed into blonde hair and kept rocking Tara softly. "I'm sorry I have all this past." Tara apologized for what must have been the tenth time.

"Tara, please." Buffy shook her head. "I'm the slayer, I was just resurrected. I understand past." She kissed the blonde's hair again.

"It hurts." Tara wept curling up even tighter if it were possible.

"I know." Buffy acknowledged knowing despite her desire to she couldn't take it away. She held on tighter, resuming the rocking motion.

It had taken some coaxing, but Buffy had finally figured out something that might make Tara feel better. With careful precision she'd filled the bathtub up with steaming water and bubbles. Finding some stubby white emergency candles, the only ones left in the house, she'd managed to create a more relaxing atmosphere. She'd carefully helped the blonde undress and had guided her into the tub. Rolling up her sleeves she'd gotten a clean milk jug from downstairs and went about the slow soothing task of washing Tara's hair, taking a long while to massage her head and shoulders.

"Now sit back and relax." Buffy instructed soothingly as she wound Tara's wet hair up in a loose bunch at her shoulder and guided the blonde back.

"That was perfect thank you." Tara's heartfelt words were almost nothing more than a whisper.

"You want a drink or anything?" Buffy questioned moving off her knees and leaning sideways against the outside of the tub.

"Mmmm you could tempt me with Co-Co." Tara smiled for the first time in hours. The warmth from Buffy's careful ministrations and the lovingly prepared bath had all gone a long way to calm Tara's inner soul.

"Co-Co coming up." Buffy smiled. "Do you want me to pick up food when I go out to patrol?" She slid the reality of her urgently needed nightly activity into the light.

"Out?" Tara sat up quickly the chill creeping instantly back in.

"Just to patrol, then I'll come home right away." Buffy tried to soothe.

"But, but, but." Tara floundered her blue eyes wide and frightened.

"It's okay, it's just patrol." Buffy reached out and rubbed her cheek trying to calm her again.

"I'll come." Tara reached out her hand to pull herself out of the tub.

"Comfy bath time." Buffy protested softly.

"No, b-b-but…" Tara's hand shook as it closed over the side of the bath.

"Sshhh." Buffy shook her head. "If you want to come, finish your bath, then we'll go out together okay?" She tried to find a compromise.

"I have to come." Tara stressed as her shaking hand released the bath side but reached out and caressed Buffy's bare wrist. "Have to." She repeated again.

"All right, but I do the fighting remember. No kung fu Wicca." Buffy gave her a smirk.

Bringing Buffy's hand back with her Tara relaxed back into the tub. She laid the Slayer's hand across her wet chest slowly stroking the back of it over and over. Buffy leaned down her chin on a folded arm that rested on the side, watching the Wicca relax and breathing a little easier herself.

Part Six

Buffy pulled her stake back as the vampire she'd been fighting with turned to ash. She smiled at Tara as she twirled it and slipped it back flawlessly into her coat.

"Sorry, you were saying?" Buffy tried to get back to their conversation before the badly dressed, slightly skilled menace of the night had jumped them. The surprise on his face when neither of them flinched was priceless. She held out her hand for the blonde to retake it. Tara did so immediately.

"I was asking you about how you wanted to approach Dawn." Tara reminded. She had suspected that Buffy hadn't actually been listening before the vampire had attacked.

"Mmmm I don't know." Buffy admitted rubbing her thumb over the back of Tara's hand.

"Do you not want to talk about this?" Tara asked gently.

"No, no of course I do." Buffy pulled them gently to a stop. "I just, I have no idea what to tell her. I'm not her favorite person and you are. I think she's going to be mad at me." She admitted.

"Mad?" Tara titled her head slightly.

"Mad." Buffy repeated her head dropping a little. "She'll think I'm trying to ruin her life, as usual."

"Ruin her life?" Tara didn't really understand. "I th-th-thought it might make her happy."

"By taking you away from her." Buffy tried to explain then stopped. The Wicca finally understood as Buffy replied. "Happy?" She questioned.

"Well I j-just thought…" Tara began.

"Happy for Dawn would be if you moved back in and she got you around 24/7." Buffy pointed out the fact.

"Oh Please!" A loud English accent announced behind the pair.

Buffy released a hard breath as she turned to face the vampire.

"Did you not get the point?" She barked at him immediately.

"Sorry didn't mean to interrupt the shooting of the remake of love story, where's the cameras?" Spike dug his hands into his pocket.

"Spike, just go away." The Slayer shook her head at him.

"Now why would I go away?" He sneered.

"Because Buffy asked you to." Tara put in and the Slayer squeezed her lover's hand.

"Buffy's asked me to do a lot of things little bird." Spike winked slowly at the blonde. "You think I gave into all of her demands right away?"

"Stay the hell away from us Spike!" Buffy sneered at him, flinching at the memories he pushed back into her head.

"Oh come on Slayer." Spike shook his head. "I could do both of you." He gave them a slow appraisal. "I bet little bird is a real mover."

"I'm going to kill him now okay?" Buffy asked the question of Tara as her nerves frayed completely.

"Bring it on." He growled and dropped into a fighting pose quickly.

"Buffy no." Tara shook her head.

"Go away Spike." Buffy summoned up every bit of control she could find as she urged Tara to start walking away with her.

"Refrecto." Tara whispered and threw her hand out towards the vampire as she moved to walk beside Buffy again. Spike staggered back a little as the magic force pressed on him.

Buffy was too focused on putting one foot in front of the other and getting away from him without killing him to notice Tara's spell.

"You're so not going to get away with that little bird." Spike whispered as he morphed into his vampire form and ran headlong for the pair, catching Buffy mid leg to bring her crashing to the floor and wrenching her hand from Tara's.

"You son of a bitch!" Buffy caught herself on her arms before she went face first into the grass. In a quick move she twirled her lower body and hit him with a double kick.

The vampire flew back slamming into a tree. He growled and got up shaking himself quickly as he readied himself for return attack on the Slayer. Tara moved quickly, running over to stand in-between the two, her eyes bright and angry.

"Stop this, and leave." She hissed in warning to him as Spike suddenly let his breath go and shrugged.

"Okay little bird." He said calmly, he reached out and patted Tara shoulder.

"Just for you. I'll walk away. I mean who can stand in the way of true love" He looked at Buffy with a grin as the Slayer scrambled up off the ground and arrived next to her lover.

"You make me sick." Buffy hissed at him.

"That hurts Buffy." Spike put his hand to his chest, giving her a doe eyed look. "I mean here I am giving you the chance to walk away and you repay me by getting all pious." He shook his head and sighed dramatically. "Yeah really hurts that does."

"Nothing hurts you Spike, you're dead." Buffy looked away from him.

"True, where as I am pretty sure this is gonna." With lightening speed he pulled his hand back and flashed out with a low rib level punch, not aimed at the Slayer, but at Tara. It hit home with a resounding sick thud as the Wicca doubled up and dropped to the floor. "God that felt good." He jumped back a little with a grin.

Buffy growled as she launched herself at him, hitting him with her whole body just as the grin spread on his face. She didn't even stop to question how it had been that he hadn't doubled in pain himself.

"I'm going to kill you." She pinned him down and reigned down punch after punch into her face.

Once the level of pain Buffy was inflicting on him moved from a point of pleasure to a point true discomfort he pushed up and threw Buffy off.

Buffy altered the motion mid air, moving into a quick roll and landing on her feet. As she stood up fully her shorter hair bounced around her angry features.

Dragging himself up and shaking himself hard he spat a mouthful of blood onto the grass.

"Got your attention didn't it?" He laughed as he coughed a little.

"It always..." Buffy strode the short distance to him and snapped off a hard kick into his side as she hit him again with a punch to the face making his head snap. "Gets my attention..." She did a slight shuffle kick as she bounced back down and up again kicking him in the opposite side. "When you hurt someone I love." She reeled back double fisted and made him spin away.

Not giving up Spike crawled to his knees but stayed on them as he began to crawl to the still fallen Tara.

"You think I'd let you touch her again?" Buffy clawed her hands into his hair and dragged him back away from the blonde. "YOU ACTUALLY THINK I'D LET YOU TOUCH HER!" She punched her hand down into the side of his throat with three quick strikes, the skin their instantly welting up. "I'd die again before I'd do that." She dragged him up and hissed in his ear. Effortlessly she tossed him sideways to smack again into a tree.

"Tara, are you okay?" She went to the fallen blonde who had stayed curled up nursing her side.

"H-h-he h-h-hit me." Tara whimpered stay curled on the floor. Buffy finally felt the world crash to a stop.

"How did you..." She stammered looking up again to the vampire as he pulled himself up.

"Witchy gave me the idea, a glamour spell." Spike admitted.

The angry growl that came out of the Slayer was almost inaudible as she leapt up again and grabbed him by the throat before pushing him up against the tree.

"Undo it!" She barked at him. "Or I swear to God Spike, I won't stake you, I'm going to cut you up into little pieces and scatter you all over Sunnydale."

"Ok, but I'm gonna have to get near to her to do it." He coughed harder as the force of her hand didn't choke him so much as crush his throat. "And you're gonna have to let me go."

"If you so much as breath funny on her..." Buffy pinched the fingers at his throat. She knew she couldn't choke him to death, but she also knew by the look on his contorted face how much it hurt. He gave her his best innocent look as she pushed him harder into the tree before backing up towards Tara.

"Undo the spell." Buffy crouched down beside Tara glaring at him.

Shaking himself to rid himself of some of the almost blinding pain that the Slayer's attack had caused. Spike lumbered over to the two women dropping to his knees on the other side of Tara. Buffy watched his every move, the tension in her ready to snap at anything. He looked up and met Buffy's eyes over the drop of the Wicca's head.

"You could let me have a little taste Buffy, call it a gift for a good old lover?" He drawled.

"Undo it..." Buffy growled. "Or I'm going to castrate you in more than one way. " She alluded to the two parts of Spike's anatomy he prized most.

"She's that good-a shag huh?" Spike began to move his hand towards Tara's body.

Buffy pulled back and punched him sharply just below the eye. She hit him just hard enough to bring his attention back to the task at hand.

"Cut the comments, and undo it." She warned again.

Spike sighed and made another move towards the whimpering Wicca, but he got to within touching distance and Tara pushed back from him with a louder whimper.

"Ssshhh." Buffy tried to sooth her long enough to get things fixed. "I won't let him do anything other than undo the spell."

The vampire actually frowned when he looked down at Tara and saw how much she was shaking.

"I didn't mean to really hurt her." He said rather lamely. "She doesn't look that frail you know."

"You never really mean to do anything do you?" Buffy shook her head at him. "Just go on doing things to get your own selfish gains and don't expect a damn thing unwanted to happen in the process. You might not be able to bite anyone but you still have the consideration of a mindless hungry vampire."

"It might be better if you do it, there's a pin, on her shoulder." Spike eased back and pointed to Tara's coat.

Buffy moved a little in front of the blonde and ran her hand over the fabric till the small sharp object poked it. She held it in her hand looking at the seemingly harmless object before she dropped it on the ground and dug the toe of her boot to break it into a hundred pieces.

"I really didn't..." Spike began to apologize again.

"You didn't what?" Buffy snapped at him and then felt her anger boil down to something much worse. "You didn't think I could love her? You didn't think I could actually feel that again?" She shook her head. "You couldn't face that the one thing you could never ever even have a hope of getting from me was hers when she didn't even ask for it?"

"I knew you could never love me." Spike's voice was low. "But what's so wrong with what we had?"

"You used me." Buffy stated honestly.

"We used each other." He argued.

"We did." She acknowledged feeling sick by her own honesty. "But if you really loved me you would never have let yourself." She added softly.

"Don't give me shit Buffy, you cant pull the moral card on me, I'm a vampire." He snarled.

"And I'm a human being." She met his anger with calmness for the first time.

For a long moment they stared at each other.

"Shall I help you get little bird home?" His voice went soft.

"Go away Spike, I can take care of her." Buffy turned from him.

Spike pushed up from the ground and took two steps back watching Buffy and Tara carefully.

Buffy leaned in close whispering words of comfort that Spike couldn't hear, as she managed to get Tara to uncurl enough to quickly check where she'd been struck.

"Do you want me to carry you?" She questioned the blonde quietly, kissing her bent forehead slightly. "It's only a few blocks to the hospital, we'll get the Doctor's to check."

"I-I-It's okay." Tara breathed her whole body still shaking. If she was honest it wasn't so much the fact that her whole rib cage blazed with pain, it was the fact that it was such a familiar feeling and pain.

"I'm here, I won't let anything else happen." Buffy soothed holding Tara to her.

"Let me help." Spike stepped forward holding out his hand.

"Don't you think you've done enough?" Buffy snapped at him. "Do you even remember what it was like to be alive William?" She purposely called him that. "What it was like to be in pain and afraid? What it was like to hurt and feel lost?"

"I didn't mean to hurt her, I swear I didn't hit her that hard." Spike insisted.

"She's not me Spike." Buffy shook her head feeling her eyes get hot suddenly and burn. "You can hit her and expect her to get back up, you can't break her and think she can be put back together to serve whatever sick plan you had going here."

"Yeah but when you weren't here, I saw her take the knocks, she was a fighter like the rest of us." Spike defended himself against Buffy's harsh cold words.

"Did you bother to look for the bruises afterwards?" Buffy bit again. "Have you ever bothered to see how we all look after a fight? How many bruises the Scoobies have totaled up without so much as a whine about it."

"She could have stopped it, you could all give it up, no one makes you." He snarled.

"I-I-If we stop, then what happens next?" Tara small pained voice asked as she lifted her pale dirt streaked face.

"You don't bloody get hurt anymore that's for sure." Spike defended.

"But hundreds do?" Tara frowned. "You know why we fought when Buffy was gone." She held Spike's eyes. "You were with us, fought with us." He didn't move as her words sounded in the night air.

"I made a promise to Buffy to keep the little bit safe." Spike pointed at the Slayer who was silent.

"We all made promises to Buffy. To each other. To ourselves." Tara's voice was soft but solid.

"Yeah, well I'm done with bleeding promises." Spike pushed up onto his feet spitting the words down at them. "You wanna hang out with a rag-tag bunch of do gooders and try to get your head knocked off every night, you do that, but I got better things to do." Despite the pain flaring through his body he tried to make a big show of lighting up a smoke, but the blood pouring out of his lip made the procedure fail.

"Bollocks." He cursed throwing the cigarette down. He tried another one only to have the same thing happen. "Oh bugger this." He threw it off into the trees angrily. Before he righted himself and took the vampire equivalent of a long deep breath.

"Damn Slayer, you did me in good." He brought one hand up to cradle his side. "We haven't had a fight like that..." He grinned slightly pleased by the idea. "Hell since before your ex-boyfriend put this bleeding chip in my head." He spat another mouthful of blood on the ground.

Buffy didn't bother with his display, she had fumbled in her coat to find a tissue and was trying to wipe the dirt off the Wicca's cheek from where she had fallen. He didn't matter anymore, she'd realized. As she'd fought with him, out maneuvered him so easily, she realized molecular sunburn or not, it wasn't the same anymore; he couldn't hurt her, not unless she let him.

"I'll be moving on then." Spike shuffled his feet a little. "Want me to finish up the patrol for you?" He offered.

"Spike, just go." Buffy looked at him again.

"I'm gone." He held up and slunk off into the dark shadows.

Tara quietly lay back on the large white bed as she had been asked to, deliberately keeping her eyes open as Buffy made the gentle request to inspect her side. She needed to keep everything clear and ordered in her head. This was here and now, she was twenty-one and Spike had just thumped her rather hard in the ribs. It was nothing more sinister than that. She tilted her head a little and looked at Buffy.

"I'm sorry." Buffy apologized in a soft sincere voice. "I should have been quicker." She ran her hand lightly over the area checking for breaks.

"Buffy neither of us expected him to go for me." Tara shook her head.

"I know but..." The Slayer looked up into blue eyes, her hands still on Tara's side lightly. "No, I can't have that. He hit you and..." She floundered trying to find the right words. "I wanted to kill him, I mean more than my usual 'want to kill Spike' threats. I mean really tear him into little bits and scatter him all over the place so I could occasionally step on him and make him squish." She reached one hand up cupping Tara's chin.

"Eww." Tara smiled softly, understanding Buffy's point slightly.

"I know this might be the last thing you want to hear, but it made me wish I'd popped your Dad when I had the chance in the shop." She frowned a little ashamed of herself.

"You did enough for me that day." Tara underlined softly. "In some ways my Dad's a lot like Spike, it's like h-he knows what is missing, w-what he wants, but doesn't know how to get it." She explained. "And tries the wrong w-way."

Buffy nodded moving her hand to the side table to get the ice pack and gently applying it to the bruise that was threatening to form on the witch's side.

"Do we need to go finish patrol?" Tara asked wincing slightly as Buffy placed the pack over her aching side.

"We did enough." Buffy shook her head. "Can I ask you something?" She held it in place her voice dropping slightly quieter.

"Anything." Tara encouraged softly.

"When you told him you'd all made promises, promises to me." She clarified before going on. "What were you talking about?"

Tara's blue eyes glanced down briefly before flicking back up to look at Buffy.

"Losing you was so hard, so hard for us all." Tara lifted her hand and twirled her fingers into the tips of Buffy's hair. "We all promised you things, when..." Tara stopped.

"When?" Buffy pushed needing to know.

"I think perhaps this is something we should all talk about together." Tara answered gently.

"Oh." Buffy nodded.

"But so you know." Tara gently took Buffy's chin in her hand. "I promised to be there for Dawn, and to make sure we never forgot anything you taught us about family."

"I love you." Buffy leaned into her hand slightly.

"I love you." Tara confirmed leaning upward causing their lips to brush together.

Buffy kissed her back urgently, almost needing to convince herself for a second that all of this was real. Tara really was here, kissing her, in love with her. And then as the warmth settled into her again, she knew it was true.

"You need to rest." She pulled back slightly and ran her hand over the blonde's arm.

"That kiss didn't call out rest to me." Tara looked up through her long eyelashes.

"No..." Buffy took a slow breath amazed as ever how Tara knew exactly what she was feeling. "But we have to take care of you."

"I think what you were thinking would." Tara's lip curled up in a grin.

"Cheeky girl." Buffy couldn't help but grin with her as she leaned in for another kiss.

Tara met Buffy's kiss with a slightly open mouth and closed eyes. She let her body ease back onto the pillow as they kissed. Tara felt Buffy move with her. Buffy eased into the kiss, tasting and exploring the mouth opened to her like it was their first kiss again.

"We have to be careful of your side." Buffy reminded herself as she felt a growing need erupt in her body for Tara's touch. It seemed like hours since they'd made love the night before and Buffy decided instantly it was too long. She kept herself braced over the Wiccan as they continued to kiss.

"You will be." Tara urged Buffy to move over her and moved her own hands free to slide them around Buffy's waist, immediately moving round to the fastening on the side of the Slayer's skirt slipping open the button and pushing down the short zipper.

"Tara, I know you didn't get to really meet Faith." Buffy groaned as she felt the clothes quickly leaving her body. "But she had this whole post slayage theory thing..." She pressed her face into the blonde's neck kissing the skin lightly in several places before sucking harder.

"Mmmmm theory." Tara groaned gently feeling her body flush with passion. "Tell me." She requested her hands now working on the buttons of Buffy's blouse.

"This theory..." Buffy moaned lightly as in their movement Tara's hands brushed over her already hard nipples. "That after getting all worked up slaying, you'd crave certain things."

"Let me guess its not marshmallows, or donuts." Tara finished her work on he blouse and then unhooked Buffy's front fastening bra sliding her hands inside to rest directly over both of Buffy's breasts.

"No." Buffy's voice shot up a little as she dragged out the short word. She nuzzled in closer kissing and then sucked lightly on the blonde's earlobe. "Though food in general was one." She eased her body closer, settling herself over one of Tara's leg on the side away from her injury.

"The others?" Tara ran her hands up over rounded skin, until her thumb grazed over puckered hard flesh and she rubbed on it lightly in small circles first one way and then the other.

"Making love." Buffy moaned the words softly into Tara's ear.

"Which probably makes me the luckiest girlfriend Sunnydale." Tara lightly pinched Buffy's nipples between her thumb and forefinger on each hand.

"Or the most tired." Buffy growled lightly at the move as she leaned in to suck harder on Tara's throat.

"I think lucky." Tara squeezed again then rubbed over the tips a little.

"Mmmmm that would be me." Buffy leaned back and kissed her.

When Tara first moved to return the kiss she had aimed for it to be a brief but expressive response but as their lips met she felt somewhat unable to hold back kissing the Slayer harder and deeper than she had previously.

Buffy felt herself being kissed with a passion and a love she hadn't known. She felt herself give into the blonde completely, trusting and knowing she was safe and loved.

The kiss lasted for a few long minutes as their mouths and tongues explored one another thoroughly, teeth lightly grazing on full and hot flesh occasionally making one or the other moan heavily. Tara eventually broke their union.

"Now its my turn to ask." She smiled.

"What?" Buffy mumbled a little dazed and light-headed.

"Buffy…" Tara paused making sure through her daze that the Slayer was looking into her blue eyes. "Make love to me." She purred.

Buffy heard the sweet words and dipped her head down again. She kissed the blonde trying to show every flare of pleasure and amazement her request had brought. Tara gave a low impassioned moan and eased her hands off Buffy's breasts sliding them round to caress her back. Buffy kept a thoughtful worry over the blonde's injured side as their kisses ran headlong one into the other. She was thankful that they had already eased Tara out of her shirt and bra to check her ribs, and with a careful hand she eased the towel the Wicca had shyly kept loosely over her away. With heavy breaths, Buffy broke away from their kiss and worked down the blonde's neck covering every inch of skin she passed in worship.

"Mmmmm Buffy." Tara purred again. "I love you." Moving one of her hands of the Slayer's back, she stroked soft blonde hair

"I know you do." Buffy responded softly and kissed over swelled flesh pressing her kisses into the skin slightly. "I love you too." She kissed over Tara's heart letting her lips linger for a moment as the beat reverberated softly into her head.

Tara moved her other hand back round Buffy's body, missing the soft feel of the Slayer's breast and the contrast of her excited nipple beneath her caressing thumb.

The Slayer released a soft moan as her lips closed around Tara's nipple just as the Wiccan's thumb touched hers. Unlike the night before she didn't hesitate and quickly eased up the pressure from her lips, her hands stroking down the outside of the blonde's hips.

Tara's hips flared up as they were touched a purely innate reaction driven by the passion coursing through her.

"Why don't we get you laid down so you won't hurt your side?" Buffy suggested softly, though the want was thick in her voice. She kissed the blonde on the lips softly and then moved away just that little bit more in order to help move the extra pillows and such off the bed. When the blonde seemed in a more comfortable position, Buffy moved back close to her.

"How's that?" She questioned running her hand over Tara's stomach not realizing how brightly she was smiling as she did so.

"Much better." Tara admitted as her eyes transfixed on Buffy's beautiful smile. "You like what you see, what you touch?" She questioned lovingly.

"You're so..." Buffy watched her fingers run over the swell of her breast and then down around between them. "Soft." She whispered.

"Is it very different?" Tara asked softly. It was a question that she had never thought to ask Willow, she knew Oz had been her only other but with Buffy it seemed like subject she could open

"Different to what?" Buffy asked stupidly.

"To…" Tara blushed slightly.

"Oh." Buffy blushed with her and bent her head down resting it on the blonde's shoulder as she continued to play her fingers over Tara's skin. "Very." She admitted as she ran through the list in her head.

"Everything with Angel was always so..." Buffy wasn't sure if Tara wanted the long answer as she played her hand under the covers that she'd tucked the blonde into as they'd checked her side. She ran her fingers down over Tara's hip and curved over her thigh before coming up again. "Intensely rushed." She settled on the probably lacking words. "And the guy from the night we don't mention..." Buffy cringed internally but she stayed more focused on the play of her hand over the wide band of peach cotton that ran between Tara's hips. "Was.... unmemorable." She slid her fingers back up circling the Wiccan's belly button. "And Riley... he was close..." She leaned up her head to look into blue eyes. "But as always not quite on the mark." She kissed Tara softly.

The sides of Tara's eyes creased in a smile as she met Buffy's lips.

"I should have known I had tendencies when Riley admitted he was a lesbian." Buffy grinned suddenly as the funny memory struck her. Tara's smile turned into a soft chuckle.

"So I-I-I'm not a disappointment?" She whispered her hand stroking up along Buffy's back.

"Can you really ask me that question and not know the answer?" Buffy searched the face before her for the truth.

"You made last night amazing Buffy, I..." Tara explained.

"Listen to me." Buffy stopped her with a soft finger to her lips. "You have never disappointed me, not in anything you do, ever. So there is no way on earth last night was disappointing. It was amazing. I know I keep saying that word but I'm a slayer, not great with the vocabulary."

"I think amazing is quite eloquent."

"Was I a disappointment?" Buffy asked quietly as she realized maybe that had been the focus of Tara's question. Sort of a 'yeah it's different Buffy, and I hate to point it out but you do it wrong whichever way'.

"You were wonderful." Tara smiled. "I'm waiting to see if it was beginners luck." She said cheekily, it would have been impressive if she hadn't blushed intensely at her own comment.

"Oh you are, are you?" Buffy immediately smiled again.

"I can't believe I said that." Tara admitted.

"TDT I like it." Buffy kissed her again lightly before her lips moved down possessed again as they licked and kissed across the blonde's body.

"TDT?" Tara chuckled finding Buffy's tongue slightly ticklish.

"Tara..." Buffy licked over her breast and over her nipple. "Dirty..." She licked again. "Talk." She grinned and closed her lips sucking slightly.

"Oh Goddess. Oh Goddesssssssssssss." Her second exclamation was a groan as Buffy sucked lightly.

Carefully the Slayer moved her body over the blonde's, she kept herself positioned low. Her lips enjoying the amble flesh for along time before boldly she started to kiss lower. She placed enamored kisses on a fluttering stomach, as her hands worked the bedclothes down.

"Am I allowed to try this?" Buffy looked up to ask the honest innocent question as it struck her maybe this wasn't something Tara liked, even though it was something that had been haunting her dreams.

"Oh yes." Tara encouraged. Buffy breathed out as she kissed over the peach cotton where her fingers had been tracing. "Looking, touching and tasting are all more than acceptable." Tara added in a whisper.

The world shifted suddenly as Buffy's senses focused in. It was with an almost guilty pleasure that she recognized the position of her own body in relation to the blonde's. Pressing her lips again to the cotton, she felt her head filled with an intoxicating hormonal scent that seemed to flare off the blonde, making her want more of it from the first breath. She hadn't even noticed Tara repositioning as she leaned in and kissed lower, her lips happily surprised when damp cotton pressed back to her.

Buffy pressed in again kissing and was pleased when the increased pressure made the blonde's hips arc up to her. She stopped for a second turning to kiss the white silky thighs at either side of her face, before turning back and placing another kiss on the cotton barrier between her and Tara's most intimate areas.

"Buffy please!" Tara's hips flared up, and her voice was a ragged groan as she brought her hips round in a high arc.

"Nice cotton needs to go." Buffy felt truly possessed by the smell and taste of the luscious body before her as she reached up and slid the material off Tara's body. Taking a deep breath as she moved closer, she kissed again letting her tongue lick out deeply into the Wicca's wetness. As the hot liquid flooded her mouth and her senses she moaned so loud she almost missed Tara's reaction.

"Ahhh." Tara called pushing her hips high off the mattress, her usually calm voice replaced by once consumed by desire and arousal.

Buffy felt her mind clear out, there was no pain, no harshness, there was only heat and pleasure and love as she stroked her tongue into the blonde's body exploring as she had with her fingers the night before.

Tara closed her eyes as she felt the gentle stroking of Buffy's tongue over and over her heated wet center. Everything became about how Buffy loved her, the intensity she felt not quite like anything she had felt before. It was so much more focused more attuned. She knew from what she knew to be obvious broadcast signs that the build up was becoming too much for her and where as often this was something she could enjoy for a long time, the reality was that Tara was seconds away from climax.

"MMMM Mmmmm." Buffy moaned again as she pushed in a bit further, sucking down softly on excited folds of flesh till she found the particular area she was looking for.

"B-B-Buffy be...Mmmmm" Tara tried to warn as the Slayer's tongue found its mark.

'Yes, you so love this girl.' Buffy's mind clarified as she licked and sucked the hard flesh before her. She wanted nothing more than to bring Tara pleasure, make her feel as amazing as she tasted. The thought of it made Buffy blush for a moment inside but she didn't hesitate; it was all just too delicious.

"BUFFY!" Tara's whole body stiffened for a spilt second and then relaxed as the Wicca broke without warning through her orgasm, her hips suddenly jumping quickly as inside the waves of release crashed over her.

Buffy found herself a bit in a catch up position as she hadn't really read the changes in the body beneath her and found the sudden erratic movements of the Wicca's hips both exciting and a bit hard to keep up with.

She tried to keep her mouth in place as she lapped at the sweet nectar the unexpected surprise delivered just for her, and with her continuous licking and sucking she drew out Tara's release.

"Not so much beginners luck as much as innate skill." The Wicca panted her hips still moving, her breathing ragged and hot.

Buffy slowed her movements, placing one last kiss on the blonde's body before moving back up.

"Innate skill?" She grinned broadly and licked her lips once.

"Definitely." Tara looked at Buffy lovingly. "I'm sorry." Tara said when she had managed to make the satisfied smile dim slightly. "I usually, that is…" She took a breath. "Buffy that was amazing." She settled on saying just that. She stretched her arm up and around her lover, happy when Buffy scooted in even closer and rested her hand over Tara's chest.

"You usually?" Buffy grinned her chin lightly resting on the blonde's shoulder as her hand gently massaged over Tara's left breast.

"Take longer." Tara blushed profusely, but her grin remained solid.

"I know I'm a bit new at this..." Buffy grin slowly went down to a genuine smile. "I mean..." She blushed. "Well you know what I mean." She played her fingers over Tara's skin drawing out letters. "But how long it takes isn't important is it?" She questioned genuinely.

"No, no it doesn't matter how long, as long as it feels right." Tara quickly assured her lover slowly dragging her fingers over Buffy's upper arm. "It felt good for you too didn't it?" She added it a hushed tone.

Buffy gave an exaggerated nod before kissing Tara's shoulder. Her body shivered slightly as the blonde's fingers edged over her skin.

"It felt great." Buffy added after a few moments enjoyment from Tara's movements.

"Perhaps you'd like to …" It was obvious as Tara's voice drifted a little that her confidence was ebbing with it, but then as if from somewhere deep inside she found a second reserve and she continued. "Let me make it feel better than great." She posed it as a question so that Buffy had to respond to before she would make another move.

"You need to rest." Buffy pointed out though the words made the Slayer's body even more flush with want. "We have to be careful of your side."

"But if I turn like this." Tara turned onto her uninjured side facing Buffy. "And you turn to, and maybe move your leg a little." She reached down and slowly brushed her fingertips over Buffy's inner thigh to encourage her to move her leg.

"Tara that could be dangerous." Buffy warned her voice heavy.

"Danger doesn't bother me when I'm with you." Tara whispered as she slid her hand around further onto Buffy's thigh. Having already rid the Slayer of her clothing, it only took a small effort and she was able to reach up with one finger through wetness to brush against Buffy's sensitive center.

"Your side." Buffy moaned as her eyes fluttered closed and her body shifted closer to the blonde's.

"Sshhh." Tara eased away her lover's worry softly, she repeated the soothing phrase and she shifted her whole hand up and made the strokes more direct and pressured.

The Slayer's leg shifted up fully over Tara's hip to give the Wicca's hand more room. Her eyes still tightly closed she eased further into Tara's shoulder, her hips rocking with the growing rhythm set below.

"Buffy you are..." Tara slowly brushed her long fingers up through Buffy's wet folds. "So beautiful." She moved her fingers slightly faster as she hugged the Slayer tighter to her.

"You make me feel beautiful, even when I don't deserve it." The Slayer whispered her soft voice thick with pleasure.

"You deserve to, you deserve so much." Tara lovingly spoke as she let one finger concentrate on flicking lightly against Buffy's hidden center, the others still pressed through the hot folds rubbing. "Just feel Buffy, just feel." She encouraged.

"I feel so much when I'm with you." The Slayer managed to timidly get the words out as her body moved slowly against the friction offered. Sporadically she would arch and gasp as the level of excitement surpassed another small plateau on her rise to release. "So much I've never felt before." She added softly her hand coming up to the blonde's shoulder gripping lightly.

"Good." Tara whispered leaning in to kiss Buffy's face as she eased a finger inside her lover's needy body, working in the rhythm that Buffy had already set. "Let me show you more." She urged moving faster and pressing in slightly deeper.

"Tara..." Buffy tried to say something, tried to form a sentence but the words melted away again as she felt the Wicca taking control of her, taking control of her not out of manipulation or greed, but out of a desire to please. She moaned louder as her body shifted more to let the blonde press deeper.

Tara moved to fill the Slayer's need keeping her movements gentle but fulfilling, caressing the skin beneath the fingers on her other hand as she brought her lips to Buffy's.

"How..." Buffy caught blue eyes, her own gaze smoldering as her body rocked and arched. "Do you know..." She closed her eyes again enjoying a long kiss. "Exactly where..." She abandoned the question kissing Tara again.

Tara replied with all of her senses, letting them tell her how to touch Buffy in the ways that the Slayer needed. Her mouth didn't release the Slayer's mouth; their tongues were as entwined as their bodies. Curling her fingers a little inside, Tara rubbed directly against the strong muscles that worked around her fingers as her own body reacted to Buffy's arousal.

Buffy's internal muscles were taunt as was the rest of her body, but the soft massage of Tara's fingers tamed her as the Slayer's body rocked harder against Tara's hand and lower body.

"That's it darling." Tara cooed loving Buffy's attentive body, she wasn't sure when she had started to address Buffy with such an intimate title but it felt right.

Buffy didn't even register the new title; every thought she could hang onto for more than a millisecond turned into amazement at how the blonde made her feel. This was desire, it was pleasure, and ultimately she knew it would be satisfaction, but there was something so much more in it. Something that through it all reminded her with every touch that it wasn't just sex, it wasn't just pleasure, it wasn't just anything. It was something amazing; it was as if Tara was opening up every barrier she'd placed between the harsh world and herself.

Tara closed her desire filled blue eyes centering on just how right this felt. Nothing had felt right for some time now. She had just been existing, not living. Just getting through the day to spend another lonely night on her own with just thoughts of the family that she had walked away from. Not that for a second she'd thought that leaving Willow had been wrong but what she hadn't been prepared for was the whole sense of losing everyone. Being with Buffy didn't take away the pain of what had happened, what it did was make it faceable. The beautiful Slayer had mended something deep in Tara's soul, and it might only be with Band-Aids right now, but Tara knew that there was a good chance it would heal properly.

"Relax darling, let go." Tara whispered kissing Buffy's ear.

Buffy didn't feel a sudden crash or flare, it was a slow steady build within her, just like a roller coaster clicking its way up the step incline to silently slide over the top edge. She buried her face into Tara's neck as her insides released a flood of fluid and her movements became slow long hard exaggerations. Her breathing was deep and labored as she held Tara tightly, wave after wave of the constant aching climax shivering through her body from top to bottom.

Tara's breath was taken away by the uninhibited way Buffy let herself experience her pleasure holding her tightly in return as she moved through the waves and gradually slowed things down.

"So post slayage love making is something I can look forward to is it?" Tara whispered as she kissed close to Buffy's ear.

"Love making." Buffy whispered back with a long slow breath out as she tried to clear the sparks that danced behind her closed eyes. She wasn't sure why it surprised her just how easily Tara was able to use the words, how easily Tara found it to understand what she felt and how to best express it.

"You prefer a different term?" Tara checked and Buffy shook her head against Tara's neck slightly.

"Yes much post slayage love making." Buffy pulled back finally to look into blue eyes again. "That's if you want much post slayage love making?"

"Oh yes." Tara underlined moving her hands to hold Buffy more fully. "I can get you a key cut for dorm, it's against the rules but." Her blue eyes twinkled.

"You want me to have a key?" Buffy smiled softly.

"Well, in case I'm late in, or you are." Tara stroked Buffy's back.

"Makes total sense." The Slayer smiled more confidently and kissed her. "And means I can surprise you." She softened the loving kiss to show how pleased the idea made her.

"Surprise me?" Tara grinned and chuckled softly.

"You don't like surprises?" Buffy checked her eyes lulling closed a bit more as she snuggled closer to the blonde's body.

"I love them." Tara nestled in closer, her own eyes feeling slightly heavy.

"Good." Buffy yawned slightly and tucked her head into Tara's neck again. "I want to make you happy." She whispered.

"You do, and I want to make you feel whole again." Tara returned her desire.

"I feel more whole every minute we spend together." Buffy rubbed her hand softly over Tara's hip as she closed her eyes.

"Good night my darling, sleep well." Tara pressed her lips onto Buffy's head before snuggling down.

Buffy's sleepy mumble could vaguely be translated to something like 'night love', but it was a hard call.

Buffy swallowed slowly as she turned her head a little, realizing as she did so that it wasn't pillow that was beneath her but Tara.

'Tara's breast to be precise.' She thought with an internal sleep smile.

Taking stock of her body she realized she was basically holding the blonde prisoner again. Her leg was looped over and around the Wicca's thigh, and her hand was draped across her stomach. As she registered the feel of bandages just near her fingertips she froze.

'Bad Buffy, bad!' She growled at herself as she tried to untangle her body from the blonde's without further aggravating her side.

"Mmmm… Ow." Tara's sleeping moan turned into one of slight discomfort.

"Sorry." Buffy whispered finishing the disentanglement.

"It's okay." Tara moved her hand and rubbed her eyes.

"No, bad sleepy slayer." Buffy admonished herself. "You're going to have to learn to fend me off." She leaned back on her own fairly unused pillow.

"Need a buffer." Tara chuckled.

"A Buffy buffer?' Buffy grinned.

"Yes." Tara nodded.

"I'll try to be better." Buffy said seriously.

"Don't be silly Buffy." Tara shook her head.

"It can't be comfy having me stuck all over you." The Slayer assessed.

"It's very comfy." Tara reassured her stretching a little.

"You sure?" Buffy slid a bit closer resting her head on the outside curve of the blonde's shoulder.

"How else do you explain us sleeping in till…" She paused and looked at Buffy's alarm clock. "Ten fifty three?"

"Well that could be explained by..." Buffy was about to enter into a long suggestive explanation when she stopped and her head bobbed up. "Ten fifty three?" She questioned looking at the clock in disbelief. "Anya said they'd be back by twelve at the latest."

"What?" Tara's breath caught in her throat.

"I don't mean this is a bad way at all, cause I know we're going to tell them and I'm very much for that but..." Buffy reached for Tara's hand under the blanket. "I don't think this is quite the way to tell everyone."

"No, no of course not." Tara closed her fingers around Buffy's momentarily and then pulled back. "We have to move."

"I'll throw on something and check downstairs while you get dressed." Buffy pushed out of bed to go directly to the closet, she pulled on a loose pair of pants and a turtleneck.

"Okay." Tara struggled to sit up smoothly ignoring the pain lacing through her side.

"No, wait." Buffy saw her wince and moved back to the bed. "First we get you ready and then worry." She helped move the heavy covers away and crouched down to do a morning after check of the wound.

"It's alright Buffy, go tidy, they're just angry, fragile after, well you know why." Tara soothed though to be honest her ribs were hurting far more than she'd expected them to.

"First concern is you." Buffy bobbed up to softly press her lips to the blonde's forehead. "The various unmentionables strewn around the house can be explained." She joked moving her hands softly over the now very angry black and red bruise.

"How do they look?" Tara leaned back onto the pillows.

"It looks sore. I think we should go to the Doctors, it might start to seize up a bit." Buffy appraised honestly. "I have some painkillers, did you need some?"

"Do I sound like a weak Wicca if I say yes?" Tara gave a characteristic smile.

"No, of course not." Buffy shook her head. "Giles left them for me, sometimes even slayer's need a little help." She admitted. "Do you want one now?"

"When we've tidied." Tara underlined.

"No tidying for you." Buffy shook her head. "Resting for you, I'll tidy."

"Actually I suppose I should walk home." Tara put forward the reality.

"You're hurt." Buffy shook her head. "There is no reason for you not to be here, as long as we aren't..." She blushed and grinned. "Naked in bed together that was the having to explain bit."

"But won't me lying around hurt cause problems of its own?" Tara reasoned.

"I don't want you to go." Buffy said softly hovering close to Tara.

"I don't want to leave." Tara admitted.

"Then stay." Buffy tried not to plead too much. "I don't want you by yourself if you're injured."

"Well I don't think I'm going to be better by this evening and you don't have enough beds for me to stay here." Tara pointed out the obvious flaw.

"I can sleep on the floor." Buffy seemed to find a way to sidestep every angle.

"Let's just tidy up and see how we do." Tara suggested.

"Okay." Buffy finally conceded moving back and offering a hand to help Tara up. "But your tidying should more include icing that and watching me do the work, okay?"

"Okay." Tara nodded as she slowly got up.

Dawn bounded in the door partially just so she could confirm she was home and didn't have to spend anymore time listening to Anya talk about the validity of eggshell versus swan white or how much lace was too much lace.

"BUFFY!" She screamed when she didn't immediately see her sister.

"Dawn, she could be at work or asleep." Willow came in lugging the teenager's suitcase with much difficulty.

"Dawn, I'm right here." Buffy appeared at the top of the stairs and slowly made her way down. "How was your weekend?"

"So cool, but I've done my wedding bit for now." Dawn grinned at her sister as she came down the stairs.

"Well that's good." Buffy looked at Willow.

"I didn't kill her." Willow admitted and left the suitcase. "I need a drink." She moved off to the kitchen

"She's been a it tetchy all weekend." Dawn whispered as soon as the redhead was out of earshot.

"Anya does that to her sometimes." Buffy arrived in the hallway. "Magic free?" She checked.

"Yep 100%." Dawn confirmed with a happy nod, the teenager had a very happy and content air about her. "How was your weekend?" She added with a chirp as she began wandering through into the living room looking around for something to snack on.

"Dawn, I need to tell you something." Buffy followed her through.

"Fire away, unless it's like REALLY bad, then before you do bribe me." Dawn sniggered as she dropped onto the couch.

"Tara's upstairs." Buffy came over closer to the teenager, her voice soft. "And before you freak out... it's only a small bruise."

"What?" Dawn jumped up and was on the bottom step before Buffy could say anything else. "TARA! TARA!" She called at the top of her voice.

"Oh God." Buffy put her hands to her head.

"Tara?" Willow came out of the kitchen pale faced.

"Okay everyone CALM DOWN!" Buffy yelled for their attention.

Dawn stopped on the step obviously torn between running up the stairs to Tara or coming back down to Buffy.

"We had a run in with Spike, he punched her, once. I just wanted her here so we could take care of her." Buff tried to get all the important information out quickly before Dawn's head blew off her shoulders or Willow passed out.

"You let Spike hurt Tara!" Dawn hurried down the stairs right up to Buffy's feet pointing an angry finger in her face.

"I did not LET him do anything. I beat the crap out of him after that." Buffy tried to explain.

"What was it a free shot at Tara as some part of your sick thing with him?" Dawn snarled her eyes blazing.

Buffy felt herself get very angry, very quickly before she forced herself to back away.

"She's upstairs in my room." She answered in a forced even voice.

"Is she hurt?" Willow's softer petrified question accompanied her leaning against the stair railing for support.

"I'm okay." Tara's calm voice answered from the top of the stairs and Dawn's head snapped round and looked up.

"Tara?" Willow turned and looked up at her relieved to hear Tara's voice. The blonde Wicca stood on the landing, her arm lightly around her side.

"What happened, where are you hurt, did you see a doctor?" Dawn reeled off her questions turning fully away from Buffy.

"Dawnie, Will, I'm okay." Tara tried to stress again.

Willow hung onto the railing for dear life, unable to believe after all this time that Tara was not only around, but she was in the house, and injured and it had to have been her fault somehow.

"Buffy was just waiting for you guys to get back before we saw a doctor." Tara soothed as she shuffled forward bracing herself for the task of tackling the stairs.

"We can take you, the clinic is open all Sunday." Dawn moved up quickly to meet her. "Willow flag Anya before she leaves." Her voice was high as she directed the redhead.

"It's just my ribs Dawnie." Tara turned her attention to the teenager taking a light hold on her hand.

"Ribs are important." Dawnie took her hand and bit her lip.

"Do you need ice?" Willow pushed off towards the kitchen.

Tara shut down her initial reaction of 'Buffy already has that covered' and instead called her thanks to the redhead.

Buffy sat down on the couch with her head in her hands trying to get a reign on the moment. She hadn't really thought it could turn out quite this bad.

"It really is okay Dawnie." The blonde reassured as very slowly Dawn and her made it down the stairs.

"It'll be okay, we'll keep Spike away from you." Dawn helped her onto the couch and ran to get a blanket to drape over her.

"I should have gone home, sorry." Tara whispered to Buffy the instant they were alone.

"It's not your fault that she thinks I'm evil." Buffy whispered back looking up to see Dawn glaring at her as she came back with the blanket.

"Now how about you tell me all about wedding dresses and things?" Tara also looked at the teenager as she patted the couch beside her.

"I'll go see how the ice is." Buffy moved away towards the kitchen.

"Will, did you find the ice?" Buffy questioned coming into the kitchen to see the hacker standing stark still in front of the sink.

"Huh what?" Willow jumped a little and turned to look at Buffy.

"Ice?" Buffy pointed to the tray in her hand.

"Oh yeah." Willow followed Buffy's eyes down to what was in her hands. "Just getting it." She put the tray on the sink.

"It's really just a bruise." Buffy underlined.

"How did it happen? I mean how did Spike manage to hit her?" Willow's voice shook as she knocked out the small circles of frozen water.

"He had a glamour charm made so that it gave his chip the impression she was not human." Buffy explained as best as they'd been able to figure out. "I beat the shit out him and destroyed the charm." She felt her head hang slightly.

"A glamour charm, but they're high magic. How did he make one of those? How did he even think of it?" Willow turned to look as Buffy's frown lines creased deeply across her face.

"I don't think he made it, he had it made." Buffy moved back towards the wall. "He's pissed off cause I won't see him anymore."

"Well maybe I can understand that, but why chose Tara?" Willow pushed frowning more.

"She was with me, we were walking." Buffy tried to keep her explanation simple. "I guess he figured first human he could take a shot at to try and hurt me."

"Where did he hit her?" Willow pushed for details even though every word seemed to be causing her pain.

"In the ribs, right about here." Buffy pointed to the space on her own body.

Willow shivered holding her own body in about the same place.

"Are they all right? She has weak ribs." Willow pointed out.

"Nothing broken that I can tell, I checked her out. But we'll take her to the clinic to be sure." Buffy relayed the obvious. "She's taken some painkillers which really helped."

"Oh I was going to offer some." Willow noted. "I guess I should get the ice then." She turned back to the sink picking up a cloth to wrap the semi-melted ice in.

"Will, I'm sorry." Buffy looked up as the hacker toyed with the ice pack.

"Sorry?" Willow kept her back to the Slayer. "She's not my girlfriend any more Buffy you don't have to be sorry to me." She added dropping all the ice for a second time.

"I'll get her something to drink." Buffy felt slapped by the words as she shuffled to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

"She likes the water with the blue...." Willow began as she turned to watch the Slayer pull out the very bottle she had spoken of. Without finishing her sentence she looked back and finished her work with the ice.

"And that's when Anya made everyone look at us and it was embarrassing, and unimportant." Dawn glanced to see that indeed Buffy wasn't coming right back. "I'll go home with you if you don't want to be here around her." She whispered.

"Thank you Dawnie." Tara replied genuinely moved by the teenager's offer. "But I can cope with Willow if she can cope with me." She gave Dawn her best brave face.

"Not Willow." Dawn frowned. "Buffy." She hissed her sister's name in disappointment. "I can't believe she let Spike hit you, she's crazy."

"She wasn't expecting it Dawn." Tara replied her vice gently. "We all kinda underestimate Spike with the chip and everything." She reasoned. "Buffy had no reason to think he'd hurt me, and she really, really did hurt him for it."

"Why is she doing this?" Dawn questioned trying not to let herself cry as she listened to Tara make excuses.

"Doing what?" Tara asked for clarification watching the teenager fight against her tears.

"Doing this to herself, letting you get hurt... it's like... I don't understand it." Dawn shook her head the spiral of her thoughts too raw and too hurtful for her still slightly naive mind.

"Dawnie, Dawnie, shush." Tara gently pulled the teenager into an embrace, rubbing her hand up and down her back as she held her. "You remember when Buffy told you that the hardest thing in this life, is to live it?"

"Y-Y-Yes." Dawn sniffled out the word.

"And you reminded her of that, after we found out where she had been?" Tara continued her soothing actions while talking. "I think what Buffy forgot in-between telling you and now, is that living isn't all hard work. She forgot about the good things. Forgot about the way you heart warms up when you walk into a room and smell apple pie cooking, the way your soul smiles when you see a rainbow, or the first flower of the spring. Buffy forgot that to feel you don't have to force things to an extreme. To feel a fire you don't have to thrust your hand into it." Tara hoped she was explaining at least a little. "Just a tiny touch will tell you it's hot."

"You're not mad at her?" Dawn questioned looking back into understanding blue eyes.

"No, I'm not mad at her." She said honestly shaking her head. "I'm sad maybe." She added honestly. "Sad that she didn't think she was worth more than Spike, sad that she looked for that kind of feeling, but I'm not mad Dawnie."

"I hate him." Dawn hissed through her sobs though it sounded more like the whine of a child.

"So do I." Tara admitted in a rare moment of severity her voice anything but childlike.

"You need another blanket." Dawn could feel her mind overloading. Overloading with thoughts and realities that even though she longed to be seen as an adult, longed to be 'responsible', she just didn't want to accept this portion of it all.

"Do you need to be away from here?" Tara asked softly before she released Dawn to scoot off.

"I need... to get you a blanket." Dawn assessed trying to make her mind go blank as she ran up the stairs.

It had taken Willow almost three quarters of an hour to go from the kitchen to the door to Buffy's bedroom with the cup of tea. She'd already thrown five cups down the sink and remade them as she realized they'd gone cold during her contemplation. Finally though she'd reached the door and knocked softly.

"Come in, no one has to knock." Tara's voice drifted through the partially open door.

"I thought maybe you'd like tea." Willow moved slowly through the door and held the mug out towards the blonde who was reading on the bed.

"I would thank you." Tara put down her book and reached out for the cup.

"Your welcome." Willow nodded catching blue eyes for a moment before she looked away. "Do you need anything else?"

"Perhaps a little company?" Tara suggested. No matter what had happened, or how much had changed, Tara still couldn't bear to see that hesitant worried look in Willow's green eyes.

"I could get Dawn." Willow glanced to the hall. "Or I'm sure... Buffy... will be back soon." She blurted out the sentence in her usual style, a style that denoted where in anyone else voice the long pauses would be.

"Am I that hard to talk to Will?" Tara asked suddenly deeply sad.

"No, no of course not." Willow shook her head frowning. "I just... I ... I'm sorry."

"It's okay I can't imagine what a shock it must have been to come home and f-f-find me h-h-here." Tara shook her head to the apology.

"More disappointment cause you're not here to see me." Willow admitted sitting down on the very edge of the bed.

"D-D-Dawn was telling me you made it through the weekend without magic, th-th-that can't have been easy with Anya on such close q-quarters." Tara couldn't face any discussion on her and Willow, not right now. So instead she went with the light hearted comment.

"When she suggested that I needed to change my hair I was tempted but I went and had a slushy till I calmed down." Willow swallowed and pushed her mind through the door of easier conversation the blonde directed them too. "How was your weekend? Other than evil Spike run in."

"Oh, the usual, watched a movie ate unhealthy stuff." Tara chuckled gently but somewhat uncomfortably especially as her subconscious added 'made love to Buffy'.

"So did Buffy really beat Spike up?" Willow asked softly.

"If wasn't for the dead already thing, I think he'd be in real trouble." Tara replied thoughtfully.

"How was she with him?" Willow continued trying to understand what was going on between the Slayer and the vampire.

"Angry. Whatever it was between them is over." Tara clarified.

"Good, I mean that's really good." Willow nodded finding a smile. "Cause he's bad, really bad and Buffy doesn't need him in her life."

"No, she doesn't." Tara added nodding with a gentle smile.

"And Spike's such an evil lying manipulative bastard." Willow stood up holding her arms around her body. "You can't believe a word that comes out of his mouth, it's like saying he loves her, total garbage."

Tara's eyes went a little wider when she heard the twist in Willow's tone and body language, not to mention her choice of words.

"He's Spike." Tara agreed somewhat half-heartedly.

"Yes, chip or no chip and we all have to keep him away from Buffy."

Willow underlined. "And keep everyone safe cause Goddess only knows what he'll try to do after this."

"I'm s-s-sure we're safe Willow." Tara wanted to reach out and touch her ex-lover, if only briefly to influence a little comfort into Willow's anger. She leaned a little forward on the bed, before a warning twitch from her side pulled her back.

"You need more ice, and pills?" Willow moved over quickly to her but stopped shy of touching her.

"It's nearly time for pills." Tara conceded. "And this time I think I'll give into the whole 'you feel sleepy' thing that hits after I take them. I have no tolerance for pain tablets." She assessed.

"Why don't I get you some toast and a big glass of juice and then you can take them?" Willow offered for the first time finding a small genuine smile. "Then off to sleepy land."

"Thank you." Tara rewarded the redhead with a smile that was as genuine as the one she had been offered.

"Okay, be right back." Willow nodded and headed back out to the hall.

Part Seven

Tara turned over slightly, remembering a little too late not to lie on her right side. Lifting up from it she moved back onto her back and opened her sleepy eyes fully noticing immediately the small beside light was still on and that on the floor beside the bed laying prone on a blue and white chequered blanket was Buffy. Blinking her slightly bleary eyes Tara focused on the glowing clock face, the numerals 4:38 shone back at her in the gloom.

"Buffy." Tara whispered almost silently testing to see if the Slayer was asleep.

"Hi." Buffy whispered moving out of her semi-meditational pose and leaning her head on her arms on the edge of the bed. "You need anything?"

"You." Tara whispered back.

"I'm right here." Buffy smiled and reached for the hand that Tara had over the covers.

"You're on the floor." The Wicca pointed out. "The aim of having me here isn't so that by morning you're in as much discomfort as I am."

"I didn't know if you'd want to share with everyone home." Buffy admitted softly.

"Oh of course I'm sorry, that was s-s-stupid of me." Tara flicked back into shy Wicca mode almost instantaneously. "A-A-At least have a pillow." Rather heavy handedly Tara pulled a pillow from behind her own body, wrenching her side a little in the process.

"Tara, shush." Buffy moved quickly when she saw the erratic scared movements. "It's okay, I'm right here." She put one hand to the blonde's cheek and the other to stop her reaching for the pillow. "Turn in." She tried to talk herself out of it but she couldn't stop the gentle instruction.

"A-Are you sure?" Tara whispered, trying to erase the broad happy smile the Slayer's words caused as she shifted a little in the bed

"Yes." Buffy held the blankets up enough to get into them and settled her body close up behind Tara after the blonde had gotten comfortable. "No one will just barge in here." She soothed reaching one arm up under her head and running her fingers through Tara's hair.

"You're cold." Tara noted as gently put her hand back and rested it on Buffy's bare thigh.

"You're warm and snuggly." Buffy whispered softly as she spooned her body into Tara's feeling as always the slight difference in height and build between them. It made her feel small and almost somewhat fragile, it was a feeling that mirrored how she felt inside at times and it made her mind rest easier. "Do you need more painkillers?" She kissed the cotton over Tara's shoulder.

"No, I don't notice it so much when you're holding me." Tara replied honestly. "I'm sorry today was so horrible for you."

"It just came out all wrong." Buffy shook her head softly knowing Tara would feel the movement, she reached down and laced her fingers into the warm one on her leg.

"It'll get better with Dawnie." Tara stressed softly.

"I hope so." Buffy closed her eyes and curled more into Tara's body. "She looked like she wanted to strangle me, well the Dawn non-violent equivalent."

"She doesn't know what she wants to do." Tara outlined. "She's basically just a child who's had to grown up to fast." She squeezed Buffy's fingers. "None of which is your fault." She added quickly. "You're just easiest to blame."

"Cause I'm the one who should have been here to make it better." Buffy's words were almost too quiet to hear even in the silent house.

"Yes." Tara nodded and tried to explain. "You're the one on the pedestal. You might not think so Buffy, but you're her world, she's only as fragile as she is right now, because you are. Which is why I plan on strengthening up your foundations a little." She added with another squeeze.

"How?" Buffy questioned a little unsure if she understood.

Despite the pain and the discomfort she knew it would cause, Tara turned over and leaned on her injured side momentarily.

"By loving you." She whispered.

"Oh, that foundation creating wonder of my universe." Buffy smiled in the dim light. "Do you think once she gets her head around us she'll be happier?" She questioned still worried, after all Dawn's reaction today had only underlined her worry that her sister was not going to take this well.

"We'll need to be careful, but I think we'll get there with her." Tara replied honestly.

"When do we tell her?" Buffy wasn't sure if five am was the time for this conversation but she couldn't keep herself from asking.

"Soon, I think, maybe I should…" Tara began but she stopped slightly unsure.

"Talk to her first?" Buffy filled in the idea and the Wicca nodded. "Maybe." She nodded brushing her hand gently down Tara's cheek. "But I'd be close by so that in a flash I could be there, just not there, there."

"I need to turn." Tara pointed out, after withstanding the discomfort as long as she could.

"Oh God I'm sorry." Buffy moved that little bit to let the Wicca turn on her side again and Tara did so slowly. "Sometimes I don't think... I get caught up..." She cursed herself softly as Tara slightly painfully readjusted herself.

"Buffy, Buffy stop it." Tara had made herself more comfortable but couldn't lie there as Buffy berated herself. She sat up pushing the though of pain from her mind. "Buffy my ribs, are not your fault, the fact that they hurt is not your fault, Dawn's instability and fragility is not your fault. The fact that you might just get so caught up in looking at me, holding me, touching me is not something to apologize for. If we start apologizing for this, for the love we have, if we start now, we won't ever stop, and I'm not ashamed of it, so I don't want too. No I won't start apologizing now. Buffy I love you, let yourself love me."

"I walked around tonight." Buffy's front teeth caught her lip for a moment, she wasn't sure why she started what she was saying this way. "I walked around and I just kept wanting to run back here. Make sure you were okay, make sure Dawn was okay and make sure Wills was okay. Hell, I even went by Xander and Anya's just to check nothing evil was lurking outside." She took a short breath and she smoothed her hand over the Wicca's over as if trying to order her disjointed thoughts. "I walked around worried and I thought about you. I patrolled the cemeteries three times, I killed seven vamps, three demons and a bat creature thing and I thought about you." She felt her hand shake a little as she kept rubbing. "And all I could think about was how much I love you. I don't know exactly when it started, I don't know why it happened, but it's there, it's real and I feel it."