Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all characters belong to Joss Whedon,
Mutant Enemy, and Fox.
Distribution:
The Mystic Muse http://mysticmuse.net
Anywhere else, please ask me first.
Feedback: Constructive comments are encouraged.
Spoilers: None...AU starting Season 1.
Pairing: Willow/Buffy
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5
Saturday, March 8 1997
The last days of winter were giving way to milder temperatures as two young people stood outside a classroom window of Sunnydale High School. The dark haired teenager smashes a window pane, undoing the latch and opening the window.
"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Questions the blonde girl nervously.
The girl glances quickly to her left, sensing something, but sees nothing but shadows.
"It's a great idea. Now come on." The boy exclaims as he begins crawling through the now open window.
As the girl moves up behind him, with his legs disappearing through the window one of the shadows separates from the others and in the blink of an eye passes by the girls back. Just as quickly the shadow fades away leaving only some drifting dust where the girl had once stood.
The boy turned around to help his new found interest only to find himself alone.
"Hey, where'd you go?" He called out, sweeping his gaze left, then right and back again. Silence was his response and there was nothing out there but the shadows.
Cloaked in shadows he waited. He could hear the voices drift through the night air announcing his coming meal. Slowly licking his lips in anticipation, fingers stretching and slowly clenching, one for him and one to take home to the master. A few more steps and they would pass by, allowing him to grab them both from behind. His body tensed, humming with desire at the coming kill.
The two girls oblivious to their danger, not knowing the terrible fate that was just moments away, laughed as they recalled a pleasant experience. As they passed by, a soft whooshing sound startled them from their conversation. Turning, all that was there was a little dust caught in the breeze, swirling briefly then settling quietly on the dark ground. Looking at each other they shrugged, smiled and continued their journey home unaware of how close they came to horrific death.
Predators of unnatural origins roamed the night. Seeking their warm blooded prey. Lurking in the shadows to pounce on their unsuspecting victims, taking from the puny mortals the warm blood they craved. But this night the shadows were not their friend. Rather than hiding them, the shadows were alive with something more deadly than even their hell spawn selves. Seven more times that night the silent darkness would leave only dust to commemorate their final passing.
Deep in the bowels of the earth, trapped in a cage of his own making the creature known only as 'The Master' howled in rage. He felt the passing of each of his children and the pain it wrought drove him into a violent fury.
"Luke! Luke! Something has happened. I felt them all pass from this existence. The Harvest is a mere three days away and something has arrived to threaten my release." The vampire screams his wrath; his head tilted upwards, arms reaching for the freedom he craves so much.
A hulking brute of a beast approaches, quietly going down on one knee with head bowed in fear.
"But master, we've had no opposition whatsoever before now. What could cause such damage in a single night?" The brutish Luke offered with bowed head and eyes glancing up warily.
"It can't be but it's the only logical explanation." The Master pauses then almost tenderly places his hand on Luke's head before finishing his words.
"A Slayer. Only a Slayer could wreck this much damage in a single night." His quiet icy words are reluctantly forced from his lips.
Startled, Luke takes his Master's hand while raising his head for the first time.
"I'll bring her to you that you may feast, this I swear." Luke pledged with conviction.
The Master looked down with gruesome affection. "I would enjoy that greatly, but I need you for the Harvest. You are my vessel and I dare not risk you. But now that we know what we're dealing with I'm sure we can arrange a nice surprise for the Slayer. But no more this night, it's nearly dawn."
The Master tilts his head slightly up and in a thoughtful tone continues. "Three hours before sunset, gather all my children that I may set them their tasks. The Slayer must not interfere with the Harvest. This sunrise must be her last."
A twisted smile spreads across Luke's misshapen face. "As you wish my Master." He spoke while trying to guess what wonderful cruelty his lord has planned for the presumptuous Slayer.
Darkness shrouded the quiet tree lined street flirting with small bits of light from well spaced street lights. Shadows undulated in a slow dance between light and dark, except for one. One shadow that moved with purpose, making its way to the dark upstairs window of a quaint house with wood siding.
A single light on in an upstairs bedroom facing the street was the only indication that not everyone was asleep. The shadow merged with the darkness of the room as it entered in complete silence. A solid form took shape as it divested itself of its outer covering. A delicate appearing hand with slim fingers took a robe from a chair, wrapping the trim body with its soft cloth.
Making its way down the hallway, the figure paused in front of the bedroom door where the light was still on. A woman reading in bed glanced up as the figure was revealed for the first time that night. Standing in the doorway, a petite blonde girl of sixteen with dark green eyes smiled affectionately.
"Hi mom. Home safe and sound." The words were soft, conveying warmth and assurance.
The woman in bed let out a slow breath she felt she had been holding all night.
"Thank goodness Buffy. Any problems?" She asked only partially keeping the worry from her voice.
"No problem unless you factor in why a town this small has nine vamps roaming around in a single night." Her brow scrunching with the same consternation that was in her voice.
Then looking up, her face taking on a slight pleading look. "But I'm really bushed. Can we talk after I get some sleep? And I'm in serious need of a hot shower." The pleading tone in Buffy's voice brought a smile to her mothers face. A smile conveying complete trust and acceptance.
"Go, we'll talk after you've had your rest." Her relief to have her daughter home safely shone in her eyes.
Buffy moved to leave, then turned and crossed the room. Leaning over to kiss her mother she spoke with appreciation." Thanks mom. And get some sleep yourself."
Buffy's nose twitched as the smells of eggs, toast and bacon wafted into her room. Snuggled deep into her blankets, cocooned in sleepy warmth her awakening conscience fought between the desires of sleep and food. After several minutes hunger won out and her eyes fluttered open followed by a slow luxurious stretch of her well toned body. She then threw the blankets from her body in a determined way giving into the eventuality that a new day had begun.
Barefoot but comfortably dressed in her favorite cotton sushi pajamas she made her way down stairs, her mood and step improving as she approached the heavenly scent coming from the kitchen. The kitchen was awash in noon day light casting her mother in an angelic brightness as she finished transferring the fruits of her labor to a plate and laid it on the center island just as Buffy was entering.
"Mmmmm, smells wonderful mom. And you've got really got the timing down." Buffy said with closed eyes and flaring nostrils as she took her seat.
"Well it's gotten pretty easy what with your enhanced senses ever since your calling." Her mother grinned placing her own plate on the island across from her daughter and taking a seat herself. "Go ahead and eat and when you're ready, I want to hear about last night."
Buffy knew her mother was anxious to know what happened but also knew that she would give a better report after she got some food in her body. So Buffy dug in without a word, savoring the delicious food with gusto. When all that remained was half a piece of toast and two pieces of bacon she sighed and contemplated how to begin. Carefully she began keeping in the fore front of her mind that her audience was her mother.
"Well as you already know, my slayer senses went wonkers as the sun set last night. But I followed Merrick's training and mentally prepared myself to sense the location of the vamps and be with the shadows." She paused, idly taking a bite from a piece of bacon before continuing.
"The first one was masquerading as a catholic school girl breaking into the high school with some guy who thought he was going to get lucky. Guess he doesn't know how lucky he really is." Buffy grinned at the thought of what he thinks he missed and the truth.
"Anyway, as he was crawling through a window, I took her from behind quiet as can be. The next was about to take two girls walking home. They heard him combusting but thought it merely the wind. I got seven others before they had even located any prey. They were all keeping to the dark making my job a whole lot easier. None of them even knew what hit them until it was too late." Buffy finished and slowly bit into her final piece of toast that she had wrapped around the last piece of bacon. Savoring both the taste of the food and the memory of the clean kills with extreme satisfaction.
Her mother, in spite of her concern for what her daughter was doing couldn't help smiling and feel a slight glow of pride. But memory of the concern that Buffy expressed last night about the number of the vampires she had encountered was her first question.
"You expressed concern about the number you encountered last night. I admit I was expecting this town to be demon free but couldn't they have been just a group passing through?" Joyce Summers asked hopefully.
"I wish you were right but from what Merrick taught me it's not likely. They seemed too familiar with the town and anytime there's this many, they most likely have a master." Buffy finished quietly, memories of her much too recent failings flooding her thoughts.
"Buffy, I know how much you respect what Merrick taught you but isn't it possible that it's just an aberration and you took care of all of them last night?" Joyce continued to press, not wanting to think of the greater danger that Buffy would be in if there was indeed a master in Sunnydale.
Buffy sat back, taking a deep slow breath in, and then slowly exhaled. "Mom, if I assume that it's an aberration and there are no more and I'm wrong I could be killed in a trap. On the other hand if I prepare for a master being behind this and I'm wrong, at least I'll be prepared for any thing that happens." Buffy then looked her mother right in the eyes and with a calm determined voice continued. "Besides, I've learned my lesson the hard way. I ignored Merrick's nine months of training before and people died. Including Merrick because he believed in me in spite of my stupidity. I will not fail him again. I thought you understood this mom. Why are you fighting me on this?" Buffy finished imploringly, tilting her head slightly to the left with her eyes softly questioning.
Joyce mentally kicked herself for allowing her own fears to undermine her daughter's confidence and determination. She reached across and took Buffy's hand before speaking.
"I'm so sorry sweetheart. It's just wishful thinking on my part. I hate to think of you in danger and my motherly instincts just kick in and try and tell me that every thing is ok when I know their not. Ever since that night you broke down and told me all about you being the Slayer and that there were vampires and demons I've been fighting against my own internal denial." Joyce paused, considering how to shore things up.
Before she could though Buffy snorted and exclaimed. "Yea, at least you're not calling a mental ward and trying to get me checked in anymore."
Joyce's face flushed with embarrassment at the memory. "But I didn't follow through with it, did I?"
Buffy couldn't help snickering at the memory as of her taking a fireplace poker and twisting it into a pretzel to her mother's amazement. Then followed up by fading into a shadow right in front of her eyes.
"Well it took a little convincing on my part to stop you." Buffy grinned mischievously.
"Oh god, and after your little demonstrations I can't believe I let you talk me into going to a cemetery with you. After that vampire crawled from his grave and you turned him to dust I was this close to checking us both in." Joyce held her thumb and forefinger a hair breathe apart in front of Buffy's face.
Buffy's voice took on a nearly desperate tone as she beseeched her mother. "But the point is why I broke down. I broke down because I screwed up so bad just because I wanted to be normal so dad wouldn't leave. Well it didn't work. He's gone and I've learned to accept that I'm not normal. But I won't accept screwing up again."
Joyce responded to her daughter with quick clarifications. "Buffy, there is nothing about you that is not normal. Being the slayer just makes you more."
Buffy sighed dejectedly. "I wasn't talking about being the slayer. I was referring to how I was trying to pretend that I wasn't attracted to girls, a lot. And if I hadn't been trying so hard to be a sociably acceptable straight girl so that dad wouldn't hate me I wouldn't have screwed up and got Merrick killed."
Joyce sighed, and then spoke calmly trying to convey as much comfort and love as she could. "Buffy, being who you are is completely normal. Denying your nature is what's not normal. You've accepted that you're gay. Now you just need to understand that being gay is not abnormal. The only way you could be abnormal would be if you continue to try and be something you're not." Still holding Buffy's hand she squeezed it reassuringly.
"Be nice if dad thought that way." Buffy hung her head sadly.
"Honey, I wish I could tell you that your father would accept you no matter what, but I can't. On the other hand I don't know for sure that he wouldn't. It's something that you're going to have to discuss with him yourself. But no matter what he does, it doesn't change that you are an incredible, loving, caring and wonderful young woman. And I love you for who you are, not what your father or anyone else thinks you should be." Joyce reached to tilt Buffy's head up so that Buffy could see her smile and hopefully the unconditional love she felt for her daughter.
Buffy sighed and slowly smiled in resignation to her mothers determined onslaught of encouragement. "Well in a town like this it's probably a non issue. If there are any other lesbians here they're probably so deep in the closet nothing would bring them out."
"Well dear, in a town that shouldn't have had any vampires but turns out to be overrun with them who's to say that there's not a large and active lesbian community here." Once Joyce got on an encouragement kick, she really had trouble stopping.
"Yea right mom. I can see it now. Right between the chess club and glee club is the rainbow sisterhood." Buffy giggled at the image and quickly asked her next question.
"So, oh great knower of all things gay. How should I dress my first day of school. Butch or femme?" Buffy smirked at her mothers little gasp.
Quickly recovering, Joyce pounced on an answer. "Buffy, you might be the big bad slayer but you are totally femme." Joyce hesitated for a moment. "But of the domineering, got to have your own way kind of femme." She couldn't help but burst out laughing as Buffy's lower lip extended into a magnificent pout.
"Enough now." Joyce places both her hands atop Buffy's. "Tell me how you're going to handle this master. I'm all ears now." She then tilted her head and raised her eyebrows to let Buffy know she wanted to hear what she had to say.
Buffy looked at her mother and recognized the assuring expression and internally sighed in relief.
"Well... I prefer to catch them before they can set up their trap. They should still be together someplace secluded. Then I use the crossbow to take some out from a distance. This should disrupt them and cause them to break ranks looking for me. When they break ranks, I take out the smaller groups as quickly as possible without revealing myself. Hopefully by the time they regroup I'll have trimmed their ranks enough to pick the rest of them off again with the crossbow. If they don't break ranks, they'll try to encircle me. But since they can't see me, that won't be easy unless I get careless. Merrick said they don't adapt well and that I should use their natural instinct to lash out and attack against them. If I'm patient and they don't all head off in all directions I should get them all." Buffy gave a big sigh and leaned back in her chair while giving her mom what she hoped was a confident smile.
Joyce pondered what Buffy had said for a minute. "Well I know you won't get careless but what happens if they do the last part, just take off in all different directions?"
Buffy chuckled as she imagined a couple dozen vamps all scattering like roaches. "Kinda depends on how many there are. If there's a lot of them, I'm going to be home reeeeally late. Chasing them all down won't be easy but it's actually safer for me. It will just take a lot longer."
Joyce was torn as to which scenario she would prefer. She kept her face placid while trying to decide if she wanted her daughter home early but with greater risk or less risk but she'd be up late worrying that her baby wouldn't be home at all. She then smiled and picked up her glass of juice. "Here's to them scattering but there's only a few of them."
Buffy quickly grabbed her glass and clinked it to her mom's. "I'll definitely drink to that." But in the back of her mind she didn't have much hope of things going so easily.
Twenty-four of the Master's remaining thirty-one children slowly departed the dark cavern that imprisoned the grotesque creature. They had received their instructions on trapping the Slayer and ending her life. It was also made abundantly clear to each and everyone that failure would not be tolerated. Either the Slayer died this night or they did.
They emerged quietly into the dark cemetery. Twenty-four monsters of the night with a mission, to kill a Slayer. Robert was in the lead determined to not fail his master. He looked back to insure that everyone was following in position and satisfied himself that they were. The sun had set an hour previously and the winter night was calm and quiet. Not even a breeze stirred the trees that abounded in the darkened graveyard. A moonless night further hid their quiet progress as they glided across the well kept lawns. Robert began to revel in the power he felt commanding so many of his brethren. Surely their was no way they could fail he told himself and thoughts of slayer blood caused his demonic passions to swell in anticipation.
A poofing sound broke the stillness of the night and an involuntary cry of alarm arose from back in the ranks. Robert quickly turned, just in time to see another of his brethren mysteriously turned to dust.
"Separate!" He yelled the predetermined command per the master's instructions. Twelve previously designated scattered quickly and raced away to join again at their final destination.
The ten remaining all turned and spread out. Robert scanned the darkness searching vainly for some indication of the slayer's whereabouts. The line of vampires slowly spread, widening their search area as they slowly advanced. Robert jerked his whole body to the right as another exploded into dust.
"To the right, quickly before she gets away." Robert called and his orders were followed with swift precision. But before they moved even a couple yards another was removed from their ranks to the far left and as everyone turned again towards this new attack the vampire just to Roberts left froze, his heart transfixed with an arrow.
Robert's anger swelled within, cold desire flashed through his thought's as he cried out. "She's got a cross bow. Spread quickly apart and try to surround her." But they still had no idea where she was as they all moved to follow Robert's command.
Robert seethed with desire for the blood of the Slayer. His anger flaming his base desires. Robert never felt the higher emotions of mercy or compassion and what he called love was only a twisted expression of selfish desire. But he could and did feel hunger, lust, anger and in the presence of his master total abject fear.
But as another of his charges dissipated in dust with only a broken cry of pain to announce his passing Robert began to feel those same tendrils of fear intermixing with his rage and anger.
He searched the darkness and shadows desperately, urging his remaining troops on. His voice beginning to waver as he issued short terse commands while his cold body began to feel the icy fear of inevitable destruction.
Robert looked back to the left and his eyes exploded in disbelief as he found no one there. He staggered a few steps desperately looking for those he knew should be there protecting his flank. He sucked air one more time into his dead lungs to voice a desperate cry.
"Where have you gone? You can't abandon me!"
His blood chilled in his body as an all consuming fear pervaded his mind. Turning back to his right to marshal his remaining brethren he discovered only the quiet of the night and shadows that approached like stalking lions.
With distended eyes he forced his legs to move at incredible speed, born on the wings of fear. He felt the cool night air breeze over his body as he put distance between himself and the silent death of the graveyard. He began to feel safer as he charged into the darkness between the trees just before he felt the painful tearing and rendering of his unbeating heart as final death in the shape of a sharpened wooden stake slammed into his chest.
A swirl of dust was all that remained as a singular shadow sped away into the night.
The designated twelve had regrouped in the industrial warehouse district. Their patience was awarded with the appearance of a lone girl walking home from the Bronze night club. They captured her and took their positions as the master had instructed them. They fully expected Robert to appear at any moment to announce the death of the Slayer. But if the Slayer showed instead they were confident that the Master's trap would succeed.
Two of the twelve stood in the middle of the alley, holding the frightened girl between them, blood dripping from her neck. Fear paralyzed her, only silent tears slowly flowed down her face, tears she shed for her inevitable demise.
The other ten held their positions, expecting to be relieved but nonetheless prepared for battle. Their anticipation of both desires warred within their dead cold breasts. Yet they waited and a terrified girl silently wept.
Buffy looked down upon the trap set for her. Hidden in the shadows she marked the position of each vampire. Ten encircled the open area, hidden in the shadows of the surrounding buildings, all with their backs to the walls. While she analyzed the situation, her heart thudded in fear as she beheld their helpless victim. Her enhanced sensed heard the barely stifled sobs that occasionally escaped the poor girl's throat. The only time she felt fear this night was fear for the safety of the girl. She knew that if she started to take out the perimeter guards, it would increase the danger to the girl. All her senses screamed that she must protect her. She knew her first priority was to get the innocent to safety and protect the girl with her own life. She couldn't risk playing it safe because she knew in her heart that the girl would die before she could reach her if she took the safe route. The only way was to take out the two holding the girl first and then whisk the frightened girl to safety, or at least some place where she could protect her. She made up her mind and slipped away to set her desperate plan in motion.
The two holding the trembling girl felt her fear, but fear of their master was the only thing keeping them from driving their slavering fangs into her tender throat. They had already tasted of her sweet blood to prepare her as bait. That appetizer had only wet their appetites for more, but obedience kept them in check. So they waited, occasionally licking their lips, their hunger carefully kept in check. They both scanned the darkness around them, ignoring the tempting morsel held between them.
Their gaze took in all the darkness, except for that on the ground. They expected something that could be seen, something that would appear upright. They didn't expect a shadow that slowly crept across the ground like a ghostly fog, unseen until it creeps up your legs, chilling your flesh with its cold vapor. But that pleasurable discomfort was denied them. The only and last thing they felt was the sharp pain caused by two stakes piercing their backs.
Buffy caught the girl as she fell and disappeared quietly into the dark. The surrounding guards quickly noticed the loss of the two and a couple of them observed the disappearance of the girl into the shadows.
"That way" One yelled as he took off in pursuit. The rest followed, close on his heels, bloodlust urging them on.
The leader stopped at the head of the dark alley, darkness so deep that only those spawned in the depths of hell could see. And see they could, the narrow alley, the high walls and a mysterious shadow, blending almost imperceptibly with the darkness. Almost, but not completely. A portion the dark was slightly lighter than the rest. The Slayer was unable to fully hide her charge. So focused on the lighter darkness, the ten slowly advanced. They knew there was no way out. They had the Slayer trapped. But their mistake was they thought the shadow they could see was the Slayer. What they didn't see was the crossbow aimed with deliberation from the darkness just to the side of where their gaze was fixed.
Their slow advance stopped as their lead suddenly disappeared in a cloud of dust. And before they could recover, another left their ranks in the same manner. Now only eight, the ones in front questioned the wisdom of their current positions.
From behind there was one who still had his wits about him. "Charge quickly before she can reload!"
Another was gone as they began their charge and then another before they closed on the Slayer. Six remained to reach the end of the alley and then two more expired without even seeing the stakes that ended their existence. The next two stopped in shock at seeing their leads disappear unexpectedly and thus were totally unprepared for the sword blade that separated their heads from their bodies.
One of the reaming two, the one with the wit to call the charge, dived forward. Low to the ground to split the Slayers attention. He grasped wildly, having realized the she could not be seen. As he heard the soft sound of his remaining support being extinguished his clawed hand contacted the warm leg of some one standing. With instinctive reactions, his claws racked out to grasp and slash with deadly intent. To his momentary gratification he heard a hissing sound, the indrawn breath of someone feeling pain. But his moment was merely that as a razor sharp blade separated his head from his shoulders.
________________________________
Buffy waited in the shadows, watching the EMTs' load the girl into the ambulance. She waited until they left, their flashing lights disappearing into the night.
With the girl safely away, Buffy gathered herself and slowly made her way home.
Buffy strained to maintain her self in the shadows as she leapt up to her window, entering quietly, ignoring the searing pain in her thigh and the blood freely dripping down her leg. Once inside, she let go her spell that kept her hidden and sat slowly on the end of her bed. Taking a deep breath, she made a decision. She decided not to hide her injury and ask for help.
"Mom, I'm home" She called out.
She heard her mother's quick steps down the hall and blinked her eyes against the sudden light as her mother flicked the wall switch upwards.
"Buffy, are you all right..." Joyce's voice died as she looked at her daughter removing her head covering and then took in the blood dripping down her leg.
"Oh. My. God." Joyce fell to the floor in front of her daughter, placing her hands on her injury. Desperately examining the injury to her precious Buffy.
Buffy place her hands on her mother's head, willing her to look at her face and not her injured leg.
"Mom, it's not that bad. But I could use your help cleaning it up. Could you get the med kit out of my closet and I'll tell you what to do."
Joyce nodded and quickly retrieved the medical kit. Following Buffy's calm instructions, Joyce helped her out of her clothes and attended the wound. After cleaning the wound and taping it closed followed with bandages, Joyce helped Buffy into a loose night shirt. After easing Buffy into bed, she crawled in next to her, resting Buffy's head on her shoulder. Very softly she stroked Buffy's hair and in moments her little girl, the Slayer sighed and fell into a deep sleep.
Sad green eyes looked back at the girl standing in front of the bathroom mirror. Set in a face of elfish beauty and framed with long soft red hair. The eyes were sad because the girl was contemplating another day just like every other day of her life. Another day where nothing happens to stop the emptiness she felt inside. Like a glacier, slowly freezing her from the inside out.
She wondered for the umpteenth time if her childhood friend Xander would finally look at her and see something different. Maybe look at her with something more, something like desire, want or even lust.
Yes, she told herself. She'd settle for lust. At least it would show that she was lust worthy. That someone would want her even in such a base way.
Xander lusted after everything female, everything but her. What does that say she asked herself? She wondered if she was even female. Not female, not anything but Willow she thought grumpily.
'That's me alright, Willow Rosenberg, big fat nothing, well... more like stick figure nothing Willow Rosenberg.' The self incrimination flowed through her like a death sentence.
Willow approached the steps leading up to Sunnydale High School and immediately spotted Xander coming from the opposite direction on his skateboard. Awkwardly weaving in and out of obviously annoyed students. Her thoughts reflected on how she'd come to rely on his offish, gentle ways to ease the longing she felt inside. A longing that she had begun to fill with fantasy. Romantic, heartwarming fantasies of Xander loving her with unbounded devotion. Fantasies that crash onto the rocks of his male adolescent hormones. Like right now, as he picks himself off the ground after crashing into the stair railing in front of school. Crashing because all his attention was focused on the backside of some new girl. A new girl whose soft curves were highly accentuated by the soft clinging calf length skirt that flowed with her movements like a lover's hand. Willow shook her head and smiled at Xander's foolishness.
Buffy passed through the entrance of the main building looking for the administrative offices. Her thoughts shifted from her disappointment of not being able to wear the tight low cut jeans she wanted or even a short skirt because her wound had not fully healed yet. She reminded herself one last time to be grateful that she had something that was comfortable to wear that was at least stylish. Spotting the administrative offices she felt the butterflies in her stomach kick in hoping she wouldn't have to explain her school record from Hemry High School.
Willow was getting a drink from the hall fountain after first period when she heard a voice that filled her with dread. Still holding her hair back she confirmed the owner of the voice. Cordelia stood there with the new girl by her side. Willow stood frozen in place, willing herself to move before the inevitable flaming. Not one to pass up an opportunity to show her dominance, Cordelia attacked before Willow even knew what hit her.
"Willow, glad to see you've found the softer side of Sears." Cordelia spoke with a self satisfied smirk on her face.
"My mother picked it out." Willow offered as her only defense. She quickly glanced at the other girl expecting to see the same contemptuous enjoyment on her face but was shocked to find just the opposite. She detected no appearance of callous enjoyment at her discomfort. Instead the girl looked shocked at the words coming from Cordelia. She's definitely new thought Willow.
Willow thinks the new girl is about to say something, maybe even something supportive of Willow. But she doesn't. Willow locks her gaze to the new girl, noticing what a beautiful dark green they are and for just a moment she forgets everything. But the moment passes and Willow turns and flees in panic. At the end of the corridor she turns and looks back once more. The new girl is still watching her with those penetrating eyes. Willow continues her flight overcome with confusing emotions.
Buffy was rooted in place after the encounter completely oblivious to Cordelia's prattle. She had felt something click when she had unabashedly held the redhead's gaze. In that brief moment she had felt connected and the severing of that connection left her with only one thought in her head, Willow.
Willow had gone to a remote area for her lunch so as to avoid Xander and Jesse. She didn't think she could handle their usually inane conversations right now Not while still feeling a bit rattled by her encounter earlier. She was trying to get a hold on her emotions and was only vaguely aware of opening her lunch bag. Her thoughts were brought to an abrupt halt as she heard some one speak.
"Uh, hi, Willow, right?" Buffy spoke hesitantly and waited for Willow to acknowledge her.
Willow was momentarily stunned as she beheld the source of her confusion standing two feet away.
"Why? I...I mean, hi! Uh, did you want me to move? Willow warred with internal confusion and offered up the standard response of the downtrodden.
Buffy's heart ached a little as she heard the traditional response.
"Why don't we start with, 'Hi, I'm Buffy,' and, uh then let's segue directly into me asking you for a favor."
Buffy then moved to sit right next to Willow. Willow felt frozen in place as Buffy approached and any coherent thought stopped as Buffy sat next to her.
Buffy put on her friendly face. "It doesn't involve moving, but it does involve hanging out with me for awhile." She further explained her request.
'Good thing.' Willow thought because she didn't think she could move even if she had wanted to. "But aren't you hanging out with Cordelia?"
"I can't do both?" Buffy asked not sure how to respond and the confusion clear on her face.
Willow felt compelled to rectify the poor girl's misunderstanding.
"Not legally." That should clear things up she thought.
Buffy's eyes captured Willow's and she exhaled slowly.
Look, I really wanna get by here, new school, and... Cordelia's been really nice... to me... but we both know she's a bitch. Anyway, I kinda have this burning desire not to flunk all my classes, and I heard a rumor that you were the person to talk to if I wanted to get caught up."
Willow flushed at hearing Buffy call Cordelia a bitch. Mostly because of how strange it was to hear her own feelings spoken out loud. But she quickly focused on the rest of Buffy's request.
"Oh, I could totally help you out! Uh, I have sixth period free, we could meet in the library?" Willow spoke excitedly at the prospect of helping Buffy.
Buffy hesitated, a worried look on her face.
"Or not. Or we could meet and go to my place where we won't be interrupted. That is if you don't already have plans?"
Willow was momentarily stumped. She had no plans but it was the first time that anyone had ever asked her. The simple consideration made her feel incredible. A glow she wanted to savor but she also didn't want to keep Buffy waiting for an answer.
But Buffy had already become concerned as she watched Willow's face wondering what was causing Willow such conflict.
"Uh, Willow. If I'm messing up any plans you have, it's OK. We can maybe schedule something later?"
Willow jerked herself out of her reverie forcibly. "Oh no! No plans. Maybe later this evening but after school at your place is fine, better than fine. The not being interrupted is probably a good idea. So, not a problem. Nope, no problem at all."
Buffy smiled warmly in appreciation. Her smile produced an answering one from Willow. Buffy felt herself freeze, completely captivated by the warmth and beauty of Willow's face lit up by her smile.
"You have the most beautiful smile." Buffy thought not realizing that she had spoken out loud until the surprise on Willow's face clued her in.
"Whoops. Did I say that out loud?" Buffy asked meekly.
Willow was completely taken aback. Years of being teased and tricks played upon her immediately caused her to be suspicious. No one had ever been this nice and considerate to her. She decided to respond cautiously.
"Uh, yea, you did."
Buffy considered how to mitigate any confusion from her blunder, not wanting the beautiful girl to think she was hitting on her. At least she hadn't been consciously hitting on her Buffy told herself.
"Well, I'm not going to apologize for saying something that's true. And once the cat's out of the bag, it just won't go back in. But if I made you feel uncomfortable, then I am sorry."
Willow turned the words over in her mind and couldn't detect any falsehood. Only the strangeness of hearing things like this said to her. Xander had on occasion been supportive but most of the time was clueless and had never paid her anything close to a complement. He even treated her academic achievements as something that just wasn't mentioned. Willow decided to take a chance because she suddenly realized she really wanted to believe.
"No, you didn't make me uncomfortable. It's just that anytime in the past when someone has tried being friendly to me it turns out to be a setup for a practical joke. Always at my expense. So I'm just a little cautious."
Buffy's face fell, knowing the cruelty kids heaped on those they saw as weaker or different. She chose her next words very carefully hoping Willow would find her sincere.
"Willow, I don't know what happened to make you feel this way but I can imagine. And I understand why you think I would lie. But I'm going to make something perfectly clear to you right now. I don't lie. At least not too people I c... not to my friends. And you are my friend; at least I hope you are. I may hide some things, things I can't talk about, but if you are my friend, I will never lie to you."
Willow felt herself truly wanting to believe now. The possibility of a female friend, something she had only briefly experienced once before in her life, was something that she had craved. A friend who could understand her perspective. Not a friend who took her for granted.
"Yes, friends. I want to be your friend and I would very much like you to be mine... uh, friend that is, my friend."
Willow barely caught the catch in Buffy's breath as she finished speaking but was certain that Buffy was pleased with her affirmation.
"So Buffy, have you been to the library to get your books yet?"
Buffy smirked at the memory of meeting the librarian earlier and discovering him to be her new watcher.
"Oh yea, had that fun already." She said with a slight chuckle.
"What did you think of the new librarian, Mr. Giles? Isn't he great? All stiffly British and oh so proper. I think he was a curator at the British museum or even the Curator of the British museum. And he brought all these neat old books with him." Willow's enthusiasm died as she saw Buffy's face turn placid. "And am I not the single most boring person in the world?" She finished dejectedly.
"No, not at all. I..." Buffy caught herself before she said anything else to scare her new friend away. "I think you sound like just what I need in a friend. A real friend, not like that phony stuff Cordelia puts on."
Willow's relieved and grateful expression calmed Buffy's anxious nerves.
"So, we'll meet after school and walk to your house." Willow confirmed their arrangement.
Buffy couldn't resist her answer. But kept her voice casual so as not to spook Willow again.
"It's a date."
Willow was nearly staggering with laughter as she and Buffy walked up the steps to Buffy's house. Buffy had just finished regaling her with the story of how Buffy and her friends at Hemry had planned a dance with an environmental theme. Buffy's ability to even poke fun at her own lame suggestions was the final straw that had Willow nearly stumble from laughing so hard. For Buffy's part, she was grinning from ear to ear, pleased with herself for making her new friend laugh so much.
"Oh god, Buffy. I'll never be able to pass a 'don't walk on the grass' sign again without laughing myself silly." Willow finally choked back her laughter and wiped her eyes which had teared from her mirth.
Buffy opened her front door, moving to the side to allow Willow to enter.
"Mom, I'm home!" Buffy called out.
Coming from the kitchen Joyce not knowing Buffy wasn't alone responded with the foremost question on her mind. "Hi honey, how's your le..." Joyce caught herself abruptly as she noticed the slim redhead by her daughter's side.
"Mom, this is Willow. She's kindly agreed to help me get caught up on my classes. Willow, this is my mom." Buffy quickly stepped in to cover her mom's abruptly halted question.
"Hello Mrs. Summers." Willow said politely.
"It's a pleasure to meet you Willow. And thank you so much for helping Buffy." Joyce paused, noticing the way her daughter was watching Willow. "Would you like to stay for dinner? We'd love to have you." Joyce offered with a warm smile.
"Oh, I don't want to be any trouble." Willow offered, really wanting to stay but lacking the confidence to just say so.
"Well it's no trouble at all, is it Buffy." Joyce looked at Buffy with a knowing smile and gave her a quick wink.
Buffy's eyes widened as she caught on to where her mothers thoughts were going but made a quick recovery.
"Nope, no problem at all. And mom's a great cook. Please say you'll stay." Buffy finished imploringly while reaching out to lightly touch Willow's arm just above her elbow.
A slight tingle went up her arm as Buffy's fingers came in contact causing Willow to catch her breath slightly. But she was happily cornered since it would now be rude to turn down the invitation.
"OK, as long as I won't be a bother. Thank you very much Mrs. Summers." Then looking down at where Buffy was still touching her arm she slowly raised her eyes to Buffy's. "Thank you Buffy."
Buffy felt the connection again as Willow's eyes locked with hers. She threw caution to the winds as she stepped forward and put her arms around Willow in a comforting embrace.
"You're very welcome." Buffy whispered into her ear while taking a moment to inhale the sweet smell of Willow's hair.
Willow hugged Buffy back automatically but once her arms were fully around her and she felt Buffy's warm breath on the side of her face she began to feel strange inside. Willow had always appreciated hugs, except from her uncle Morris, because no matter who he hugged he acted as though he was wrestling a bear. Buffy's spontaneity surprised her a bit. She had never received a hug so soon from a new friend, not that she had that many friends. But just before Buffy released her, something about the way Buffy was holding her made her feel slightly uncomfortable. Not that the hug was physically uncomfortable, because it wasn't. It was a nice firm hug. There was just some nuance she couldn't quite identify that made it feel different from how anyone had ever hugged her before. That's what felt uncomfortable. Willow felt torn. She had already decided she liked Buffy and was thrilled to have her as a friend. So why would a simple hug make her uncomfortable? She was brought out of these thoughts when Buffy turned and asked her to follow her up to Buffy's room.
"Right behind you." Willow replied shaking her head slightly to clear her head.
Joyce had caught the change of expressions on Willow's face and couldn't help but frown. As she watched the girls walk up the stairs she couldn't help but feel that her daughter was going to get her heart broken. And that frightened her more than she could say. Her primary concern was Buffy's happiness and safety. And a broken heart could make her daughter careless. Buffy hadn't been careless last night and still received a wound. She didn't want to think what would have happened if Buffy had a similar encounter after putting her heart out and having it rejected. 'It's time for a little mother/daughter talk' she told herself as she went back to preparing dinner.
The last dishes were washed and put away when Buffy turned to her mother.
"Mom, Willow asked me if I wanted to go to this place called the Bronze. It's kinda the teen hangout around here." Buffy looked over her shoulder to make sure Willow was still in the other room and couldn't hear as she lowered her voice. "And I thought it would be a good idea to check it out for vamp activity. I'll only stay about an hour then make sure Willow gets home safely. I should be home by nine at the latest."
Joyce looked into her daughter's pleading face and let out a soft sigh. Memories of how attentive Buffy had been to Willow during dinner still fresh.
"Buffy, come out to the back porch with me. We need a little talk." Joyce turned towards the back door missing the look of panic on Buffy's face.
Joyce sat down on the back step waiting for Buffy to join her. She heard the door close quietly and felt Buffy sit down next to her before she began.
"Buffy, Willow is a very attractive girl and..."
"ATTRACTIVE, God mom. She's gorgeous! And if you could see her smile, well it just lights you up inside and makes everything melt away." Buffy strained to keep her voice low but her emotions were running pretty high.
"That's just it Buffy. You just met her and you're already smitten." Joyce turned to Buffy before continuing. "Do you even know if she's gay?" She asked Buffy slowly, drawing out each word for emphasis.
"Smitten mom?" Buffy chuckled trying to de-emphasize her mother's concern and trying to ignore her question.
"Come on Buffy. Don't blow me off." Joyce was forceful with her words trying to convey how important this was.
Buffy let out a big breath. "No, I don't know if she's gay. But when she looks at me I feel this connection. And I just know there's something there."
"Ok, just for arguments sake, let's say she's gay. But does she know she's gay?" Joyce was meeting Buffy half way just to get her to talk about it.
"No, I don't think she knows." Buffy dropped her head after her admission. Suddenly feeling a moment of despair.
"Either way Buffy, you're going to have to take it slow. Just be her friend. If you start coming on to her you'll scare her off. And if she is gay but just hasn't had the opportunity to explore her sexuality then the best thing is for you to just be the best friend you can be. And you can start by letting her know that you're gay." Joyce watched her daughter's shocked expression and put her arm around her in a show of support.
"Buffy, think about it. If you're honest with her and let her know right away that you're gay, she's going to do one of two things. Either she'll remain your friend or avoid you. If she's straight and she avoids you then you know she doesn't have what it takes to be a real friend and you can move on. But if she sticks with you then you know you've got a friend you can trust. On the other hand, if she's gay but hasn't realized it yet, then you've created a catalyst to get her to start thinking. And even if she avoids you for now, it doesn't mean she won't eventually come around after she figures things out." Joyce gave Buffy's shoulders a gentle squeeze of encouragement.
Buffy laid her head on her mother's shoulder realizing she couldn't argue with her logic. Telling Willow still scared her silly but she knew her mom was right. "Ok mom, I succumb to your many years of wisdom." Buffy conceded with the little dig.
"Harrumph. Then your 'Old lady' says I'll expect you home by nine." Joyce responded with gruff humor.
Willow had just finished reading the English lit requirement for three weeks away when she heard a door close and the sound of Buffy and her mother coming towards the living room.
"You all ready?" Buffy asked as she entered the room followed by her mother.
"Yep, all done. Uh, so are you coming to the Bronze?" Willow asked quickly looking at Joyce for her reaction.
"Yea, count me in. I just have to be home by nine." Buffy looked at her mother with a smirk. "If I'm not she's going to make me wear the damn chastity belt for a month." Buffy teased her mother.
"Lot of good it would do since you figured out how to pick the lock." Joyce kidded her right back.
Willow's mouth hung open as she just stared at the mother and daughter kibitzing each other. She couldn't imagine having such an exchange with her mother. The very thought caused her heart to flutter.
"Wow, you guys are so cool together. My mom would have a coronary if I ever said anything like that to her. Then again she'd have to be around for me to say something like that to her. And she'd have to put a curfew on me but since she never knows I'm around even when I am that wouldn't happen either. But even if she did, I'd just do what she says cause that's what I do at least I think I would it's just that it's never come up before and not likely to either." Willow cut herself off as she noticed the looks of amazed amusement on the two faces staring at her raptly.
"Oh, sorry, I've kinda been known to babble." Willow hung her head in embarrassment.
Buffy's impulse was to leap forward and pull Willow into a comforting hug but stopped as she felt her mother's restraining hand on her arm. Looking at her mother, Joyce winked back at her and moved forward herself. Putting her arm around Willow's shoulder in a comforting manner.
"Nothing to be embarrassed about Willow. It was actually quite amazing and I think I speak for both of us when I say we look forward to the next time you grace us with such a wonderful display of breath control and oration." Joyce assured her with a caring tone.
"Now you two go have some fun but not too much. And Willow, I hope to see you soon." Joyce said releasing the girl and allowing them to move towards the door.
Willow turned just before leaving. "Thank you Mrs. Summers, for dinner and uh... well thanks!" Willow beamed at her with a grateful smile.
As the door closed behind the girls Joyce spoke to Buffy knowing she wouldn't be heard. "You're right Buffy. She is beautiful. And that smile...Oh baby, you're in trouble." Joyce turned hoping Willow wouldn't just reject Buffy out of hand. 'I really like that girl' Joyce thought to herself as she moved towards the pile of paperwork she needed to get through for the new gallery.
The sun had set just as Buffy and Willow entered the night club. Still somewhat early, they had no trouble finding a couple of seats after getting something to drink.
Buffy considered what her mother had told her but decided she just couldn't blurt it out. 'So not cool' she thought. She decided to do the best friend thing and start by asking Willow about herself.
"So tell me. What have you got going on in your life right now? Your friends, enemies and...Any love interests? Spill, I want to know all." Buffy encouraged.
"Oh, you want to know about me?" Willow asked thinking how she'd explain how she only had two friends, both guys who thought of her as just one of the guys. And how one of them was a love interest but of the one way street type.
"Yea I want to know about you. You're my first friend and first friends usually become best friends. So go for it, dump on me. That's what best friends are for." Buffy told her sincerely.
"Oh, OK. Well friends are Xander and Jesse. I've know Xander since kindergarten and Jesse almost as long. Xander and Jesse do all the guy things together and usually include me 'cause they think of me as just one of the guys." Willow let a little anger show in her voice with the last admission.
Buffy's instinct was to interrupt and say something but she caught herself before she did. 'You're being a best friend, so just listen and be attentive' she told herself.
Willow had paused, expecting Buffy to say something but when only seeing an interested and attentive face looking back at her she bowed her head and continued.
"Enemies are Cordelia and her flock. Harmony is probably the worst after Cordy. And what hurts about that is that Harmony has the brains of a baboon. And that's an insult to baboon's everywhere!" Willow wanted to stop but finally being able to get out everything that bothered her to someone who was actually listening was liberating. But she didn't know how to explain the love interest part so she just hung her head and remained quiet.
Finally Buffy spoke, but only to encourage Willow to continue. "What about love interests?"
"Woooo, none, nada, zip, big fat zero in that department. I've never had a boyfriend and no one has ever shown any interest in me. Probably 'cause I can't talk to boys. I make a few vowel sounds and then I have to leave." Willow finally replied deciding to keep it safe.
Buffy finally couldn't help herself. And she did nothing to hide the disdain she felt. "The boys in this town must be really lame if you've never been asked out."
"No, well yes, they are kinda lame but I can't blame them. They all want to go out with pretty girls. Not flat as a board stick figures whose mother buys all her clothes for her." Willow's voice evoked years of loneliness and it broke Buffy's heart.
"Willow, I'll admit that your clothes do nothing for you but even so I noticed how pretty you are in spite of them." Buffy couldn't help herself from trying to bolster the poor girl's severely deflated ego.
Willow gave a weak smile at Buffy's attempt to make her feel better. Not that she believed Buffy but because Buffy tried to make her feel better. Just like a best friend would. She started to think this best friend thing could really work out.
"Thanks Buffy, but enough about me right now. How about you? I met your mom and she is great. What about your dad? And then tell me about where you came from and how you came to be here." Willow turned all her attention to Buffy hoping to divert the conversation from her miserable life.
"You really want to hear this? Everything? Cause once you hear this you're probably going to want to run away from me as fast as you can." Buffy asked, hoping that Willow would give her a reprieve.
"Best friends Buffy. I'm not going to run away, uh unless you kill babies or kittens. But short of that nothing you say could make me run away. Give me your worst." Willow said now more interested than before to hear what could be so awful that Buffy would think she would want to run away from her.
"Ok, here it comes. The not ready for prime time Buffy." Buffy took a big breath before continuing.
"Nope, no baby's or kittens or anything like that. My mom is great; in fact she's the greatest. Because of her it made it a little easier when dad left." Buffy glanced at Willow to see her reaction but detected nothing but interest.
"They started having problems when I was in sixth grade. It slowly escalated during junior high. Dad was being a real ass and I started to think it was because of me." Buffy paused, unsure of how to proceed.
"Why would you think it was because of you?" Willow encouraged her to continue.
Well here goes Buffy thought. "I thought he had found out about me. That he had figured out that I was..." Buffy's voice dropped very low, so low that Willow had to lean forward to hear her. "That I was interested in girls." Once said Buffy continued in a more normal voice but without looking at Willow. She could tell Willow was still sitting next to her so she continued.
"I thought he was angry because he couldn't deal with a daughter who was gay. And the more they fought the more convinced I became that I was the cause. Mom didn't know what was going on with me, just that I started to behave like a juvenile delinquent. When I started high school, I decided to try and be the straight popular girl that I thought my dad wanted. I went out with boys, became a cheerleader and my friends were all the popular beautiful people. Well something bad happened and because I was so busy trying to be something I wasn't I wound up in a bad situation. I burned down the school gym and was expelled from the LA school district. Dad left and mom moved us here. The only school district that would take me. Mom told me later that dad leaving had nothing to do with me. He had been as clueless about me being gay as she was." Buffy finally looked up at Willow expecting to see a face contorted in disgust.
Willow had been listening raptly to Buffy's story. She was a little surprised about the gay thing but quickly realized it didn't bother her. What bothered her was the pain Buffy must have experienced going through this revelation and feeling that it was the cause of her parent's marital problems. And her curiosity was definitely aroused hearing that Buffy had burned down a gym. 'Why would she burn down a gym?' She mused. But as Willow watched Buffy's face slowly turn in her direction she let all the care and concern she felt for Buffy's predicament show on her face.
Buffy was amazed. Willow was still here and not because she was rooted to her seat in shock. There was no condemnation looking back at her. Only kindness and a warm, gentle smile. Buffy took a big breath.
"Well so now you know." Buffy said to finish her trip down the memory lane of hell. She had left a lot out, but they were things she couldn't reveal. Slayer things. And she knew if she had revealed everything, Willow would be convinced she was a raving lunatic.
"Except for why did you burn down a gym?" Willow couldn't contain her curiosity.
"I just tell you I'm gay and you want to know why I burned down a gym." Buffy couldn't help but chuckle.
"Well yea, there's a lot of gay people though you're the first one I've met, well at least the first one I've known about, but I'll probably never meet anyone who's burned down a school gym. Come on, did you really hate gym class that much?" Willow nudged her and smiled.
Buffy couldn't help herself. She began to laugh. Out of relief, humor and just the pure amazement of her wonderful new friend. She knew then that even if Willow was straight, she wanted her as a friend. A best friend.
Willow began to laugh with her but once they got themselves under control again, Buffy turned serious in order to answer Willow's question.
"Remember when I said I would never lie to you but sometimes there are things I just can't talk about? Well this is one of those." Buffy explained hoping that Willow wouldn't feel hurt.
"Ok Buffy. Keep your secrets and I'll keep mine." Willow replied in mock hurt but Buffy suspected there was a hint of real hurt there.
"Honestly Willow. It's not that I don't want to tell you, it's that I can't." Buffy tried to mitigate the perceived disappointment.
"It's ok Buffy. I understand, well not really since you can't tell me. But I do believe you'd tell me if you could and I'm fine with that." Willow reassured her and smiled.
"Thanks, I really appreciate that." Buffy returned her smile.
Before anything else could be said Buffy felt a presence and without thinking she held her hand up for Willow to be quiet. Quickly focusing she identified the location of the vampire and turned her predatory gaze in its direction.
Walking in her direction was a tall, dark haired man all in black except for a white t-shirt. She slowly let slip the stake that she had up the sleeve of her jacket until it was firmly nestled in the palm of her hand. Keeping her hands hidden under the table top she watched the vamp's slow approach. She was trying to figure out how to take this outside because she definitely didn't want to dust a vamp with Willow looking on. As she considered her options, the vamp halted at the other side of their table.
"Can I talk to you, Uh...in private?" He asked Buffy, only giving Willow a quick glance.
"Why, do I know you?" Buffy tried to keep her tone casual.
"Uh no. But I know you. You were pointed out to me in LA." He spoke hesitantly, again glancing at Willow as if trying to determine what her involvement was.
"Oh really, anyone I know?" Buffy asked him to clarify.
"Probably not but his name is Whistler. He works for the ptb." He said and once again glanced nervously at Willow then looked pleadingly at Buffy.
"Look, I'm not here to cause trouble. I uhh...don't bite or anything." He raised his eyebrows hoping to convey the silent message. "I'm here to help and I have some information for you. But it's private, for your ears only."
Buffy considered for a moment. This was the most unusual vamp encounter she'd ever had. Going outside with him could mean a trap, but once outside she could disappear into the shadows. Her problem was solved when Willow spoke up.
"Buffy, why don't you hear what he has to say while I go to the restroom." She said while standing and laying a reassuring hand on Buffy's shoulder.
Buffy looked up at her and expressed her gratitude. "Thanks Will."
Willow smiled reassuringly and then turned a concerned face to the mysterious man across the table. "I'll be back shortly." She warned.
Once Willow was out of earshot, the vampire took a chair and seated himself across from Buffy who still had a firm grip on her stake under the table.
"Ok, vamp. You know who I am and I know what you are. So tell me why you want to help a vampire slayer." Buffy spat out cynically.
"I'm here to tell you that the Harvest is coming. You need to be ready for it." He said ominously.
"Ok, what's the Harvest, when is it and how do I prepare?" Buffy asked, hating cryptic messages.
The vampire smiled mysteriously. "You're standing at the mouth of hell and if you're not ready, it will swallow you."
"You know, this is sounding more like a threat than information. How about we go outside and I dust your sorry ass?" Buffy's anger was getting the better of her. The vamp was putting out a vibe that was making her really uncomfortable.
The vampire smirked at her, showing the typical arrogance of an older, more mature vampire. "You're going to need all the help you can get to survive this year."
Buffy's feeling that the vamp was putting out some kind of vibe that was pissing her off was just getting stronger. "Look, asshole. You're no help giving me vague messages and cryptic threats. Either tell me everything you know or you'll be dust before dawn. Because so far you've been no help at all." Buffy paused as she watched his smirk turn to a frown. "And are you doing something. Like some vamp kinda of whammy stuff. Because if you are you really suck at it."
The vampires frown turned to a look of surprise. A moment later he composed himself and Buffy immediately felt the vibe disappear and her anger began to dissipate and then renew as she had her answer.
"You were! What the hell do you think you were doing?" Buffy glared at him.
He smiled almost sheepishly, she was sure he'd be blushing in embarrassment if he physically could.
"Older vampires can project emotions and sometimes a controlling influence. I was projecting something that should have made you attracted to me. I was doing it to get you to trust me." He shrugged in explanation.
"Well just cool it Don Juan. That won't work on me, unless you were a female vamp that is." Buffy raised her eyebrows.
"Oh. Sorry, my mistake." He apologized contritely, surprise clearly written on his face.
"But you can still gain my trust. All you have to do is tell me what you know and leave out all the cryptic nonsense." Buffy said to get him back on track.
"Yea, well I was told not to tell you more than necessary but I guess it's necessary now. The harvest is where a master vampire can designate one of his children to go out and feed for him. Every victim this vessel feeds upon gives the master more power. Now this master needs this power because years ago he tried to open the hell mouth but something went wrong and he got stuck in a mystical prison. But with enough power from the vessel, he can break out. As for when, the harvest occurs once every 100 years. The next time it can occur is tomorrow night." The vampire finished and fell silent.
Buffy considered the information and quickly had a few questions. "Will he send this vessel out by himself?"
Shaking his head the vampire answered. "No, he'll send as many of his children as he can to help the vessel gather victims."
Buffy frowned before asking her next question. "Do you know how many he has?"
"Well as of last Friday I think there were about forty." He offered the bad news but was immediately put off by the smile that spread across the Slayer's face.
"Then that means he only has seven left." She said softly.
The vampire couldn't believe what he just heard. "How can you know he only has seven left?"
Buffy couldn't help the gloating look on her face as she told him. "Because I dusted nine on Saturday and twenty-four last night. And according to my math thirty-three from forty equals seven."
"By the way, what's your name?" Buffy asked him while he stared at her in disbelief.
"Uh, Angel" He said quietly, not quite over the surprise of the slayer taking out so many in only two days.
"Thanks Angel. And you might want to avoid dark places when you're out at night. Wouldn't want to confuse you with one of the bad guys." Buffy smiled evilly at him.
"Yea, you're welcome." He said as he rose to leave.
Buffy watched him leave the club just as Willow sat back down beside her.
"Please tell me this isn't one of those things you can't tell me?" Willow pleaded.
Buffy felt awful inside. She really wanted to share this with Willow but knew she couldn't. Willow saw the pained expression on Buffy's face and decided to downgrade her inquiry.
"Well can you at least tell me if you're in trouble or danger?" Willows quietly asked for this small concession.
Buffy relaxed a little and chose her words carefully. "No, not in trouble. In fact there was actually some good news."
"Not in trouble, but what about danger?" Willow asked concerned.
Buffy didn't want to worry her friend but she couldn't lie to her either. "Well the good news makes the danger less, nothing I can't handle." Buffy reassured her by placing her hand atop Willow's and giving it a comforting squeeze.
"Hey Willow. Missed you today." Caused both girls to look up to where Xander was standing. He had been talking to Willow but his eyes were on Buffy.
"Oh Xander. Uh Hi. I was helping Buffy get up to date on classes. And Oh, Xander this is Buffy. Buffy, Xander." Willow rambled off her mind still on her conversation with Buffy and feeling slightly annoyed at Xander's interruption.
Xander helped himself to the seat that had been recently occupied by Angel. While not completely ignoring Willow he couldn't get his eyes off Buffy.
"Hi Buffy! So what brings you to Sunny D?" Xander opened up trying to engage the new girl. The very hot new girl he was thinking.
"Hi, and uh...my mom moved us here to open a new business." Buffy said, not actually lying but not comfortable telling this stranger the real reasons.
"Well hooray for free enterprise. We can always use new blood in town." Xander spoke, unable to take his eyes off Buffy though he was confused as to why she found his remark amusing enough to chuckle.
"Hey, did I say something funny? Of course, I'm a funny guy. Just ask Will, tell her Will. Tell her how funny I am." Xander's immediate thought was that Buffy found him interesting and he desperately tried to push this advantage.
"Oh yea, he's a riot." Willow rolled her eyes and Buffy laughed at the incredulous look on Willow's face.
"Really good band tonight. Wanna dance Buffy?" Xander asked, desperately feeling the need to get close to Buffy.
Buffy tried to control the panic she felt. Looking over at Willow she saw her glaring at Xander with a slightly hurt expression on her face. Thinking quickly she put her hand on Willow's shoulder.
"I'd love to dance." Xander started to stand and Willow looked at Buffy in surprise. "Willow, would you dance with me?"
Willow's surprise turned even more so. She didn't want Buffy dancing with Xander and she had hated the way Xander was blowing her off to go after Buffy. Her first thought was dancing with a girl would draw attention, and Willow hated to be noticed. Bad things happened when people noticed her. But then she thought accepting Buffy's offer would kill two birds with one stone. Xander wouldn't be dancing with Buffy and it would bring him down a notch. Her decision made she smiled at Buffy.
"I'd love to." She responded gleefully.
"Huhh...whaaaa..." Was all that came out of Xander's mouth as in shock he watched Buffy lead Willow to the dance floor. Sitting back down slowly he tried to figure out what just happened. 'Why didn't she just say no thank you" he thought 'or make up some other lame excuse.' He hated rejection but was used to it. This wasn't just rejection, it was humiliation. Imagine, she'd rather dance with Willow than him. What was the world coming to he thought just before his mind quickly turned to ones more pleasant as he watched the two girls sway close together.
Buffy leaned towards Willow so as to be heard over the music. "Thanks for getting me out of that."
"Hey, that's what best friends are for." Willow responded with a smile.
"It was probably a cruel thing to do to him, but I hated the way he was just blowing you off and coming on like gang busters to me." Buffy further explained her reasoning.
"Yea, Xander can be pretty insensitive. But I always forgive him. He's really a good guy deep down. He just wasn't around when they were handing out clues." Willow felt compelled to defend her childhood friend.
Buffy felt a twang of guilt. She suddenly realized that Willow had feelings for Xander. This evoked other not so pleasant feelings. But she shook them off and decided to do the best friend thing. Leaning in a little closer as they continued to sway slowly to the slow beat of the song she asked Willow as loudly as she dared.
"You have feelings for him, don't you?" Buffy followed up with a meaningful look as she caught Willow's eyes with her own.
"Uh yea, but he'll never see me that way." Willow mumbled and only Buffy's heightened hearing enabled her to understand Willow's words.
The song ended and as the turned to go back to their table Buffy spotted someone in the upper balcony watching her. Turning to Willow she spoke encouragingly. "I have something I need to take care of. Why don't you go console Xander and I'll be back in a couple of minutes. OK?"
"Oh, sure." Willow replied thinking Buffy just needed to use the restroom. But as she watched Buffy walk towards the stairs and not the back hall where the restrooms were she looked up. She immediately spotted the school librarian, Mr. Giles. He was watching Buffy intently as she approached him. Willow just stared for a moment as they started to talk. Shaking her head, questions started to swirl in her mind. Then Xander caught her attention with a wave of his arm. She returned to the table, her curiosity contained until later.
"Hey, ever heard of a vampire called Angel?" Buffy asked her watcher, bypassing formal greetings.
"Uh, no. I don't believe I have. Did you take care of him?" Giles responded awkwardly, having been prepared to be the questioner.
"No, I didn't. He had information for me and says he's working for the good guys. The ptb, whatever that is." Buffy responded, disappointed that her watcher didn't have any information regarding the strange vampire.
"The Powers That Be?" Giles responded in surprise. "Well that would be a first. A vampire working for the powers is quite extraordinary."
"Well I plan on keeping an eye on him but he seemed sincere. He gave me some information that I need you to verify to see if he's on the up and up." Buffy then filled her watcher on everything that transpired between her and the vampire.
When she completed her report Giles was busily wiping his glasses with a handkerchief. Putting them back on his face he fixed Buffy with a nervous expression. "This is incredible Buffy. If this information can be verified we just might be able to avert an apocalypse."
"An apocalypse? Isn't that a bit extreme Giles?" Buffy asked incredulously.
"No, it's not extreme in the slightest." Giles responded annoyed that his evaluation was questioned. "If this master is released and completes the opening of the Hellmouth, we'll be overrun with demons from whatever hell dimension it links to."
"Oh, so this hell mouth is like some mystical doorway to hell. And if it opens it's like an all you can eat buffet in Ethiopia." Buffy nodded her head in understanding.
"Well not the example I would have used but I believe you've captured the essence of the matter." Giles shook his head unable to not feel somewhat amused at how the young girl chose to perceive something so horrific.
"Ok, well he's only got seven vamps left to pull off this Harvest thing. And I have a pretty good idea where they'll be coming from. The same place as the twenty-four from last night. I'll get them before they even get close." Buffy summed up her plan then looked at her watch. "Damn, look, I've got to go but we'll talk tomorrow at school. See ya!" Buffy turned and quickly made her way downstairs leaving Giles sputtering at the quick dismissal.
Buffy slowed her approach to the table as she spied Willow and Xander talking quickly back and forth. As she got close enough to hear over all the background noise she picked up Xander's side of the conversation.
"...don't understand Will. You've made friends with one of the hottest babes in school. And she's got no history here which is perfect. Why won't you help?"
"Xander, you've just got to trust me on this. You don't stand a chance." Willow's exasperation was showing. "Just give it up and move on." Should take my own advice Willow thought to herself just as they were interrupted by Buffy's return.
"Hey Will, I've got to get going." Buffy said before Xander could get out another attempt to engage Buffy.
"Can you walk with me?" Buffy asked Willow quickly.
"Oh, sure." Willow rose and turned to Xander. "Night Xander. See you at school tomorrow?" Willow asked never sure if Xander would actually show up.
Xander slumped his shoulders in defeat. "Yea, see you tomorrow."
"Bye Xander. It was nice meeting you." Buffy gave the standard salutation without emotion.
"Likewise, I'm sure." Xander responded quietly as he watched his best friend leave with his latest rejection.
Buffy and Willow had left the club behind when Buffy finally spoke since telling Willow to walk to Willow's house.
"Hey mopey, are you okay." Buffy asked gently.
"Yea, I guess." Willow pursed her lips, her thoughts a little too jumbled to form a full sentence.
"I overheard the end of your conversation with Xander. Didn't mean to, kinda just did." Buffy started hoping Willow would open up to her. "He seemed pretty upset that you won't help him. Why didn't you just tell him that I'm gay? At least it would have saved his feelings and put a stop to any further embarrassing problems."
"Oh, I didn't think it was my place to tell him and I wasn't sure how he'd react." Willow turned her head towards Buffy and shrugged her shoulders.
"If you trust him not to go spreading it around school it would be OK." Buffy paused suddenly concerned. "What do you mean you don't know how he'd take it? Is he phobic?"
"Is he phobic?" Willow repeated Buffy's words back at her. "Uh, I don't think so, well maybe a little but I think only if it's a guy. So no, I don't think he'd have a problem with that." Willow paused, trying to figure out how to phrase her concern. "I think it would be more about me. As in me being friends with you. While Xander is pretty clueless, he's always been protective of me. I'm concerned that he might think that you would try and convert me or something." Willow looked at Buffy embarrassed. "Pretty silly, huh?"
Buffy drew on all the research she had done when she had realized that she was attracted to girls. "Well it's silly to think that someone can be converted. You either are or you're not. It's just that people figure it out at different times in their lives. Some just know it from the time they're little kids and others don't figure it out until they're married with a couple of kids."
A sudden thought occurred to Willow. Buffy and she had taken to each other pretty quickly. She was all of a sudden concerned that Buffy might think she was gay. Willow didn't think she was and didn't want to lead her new friend on. "Uh Buffy, you don't think I'm gay, do you? Because I really don't think I am."
Buffy answered cautiously. "Willow, what I think or anyone else thinks doesn't matter. It's something that each of us needs to figure out for ourselves. If you're straight you're still my best friend. That won't change."
Willow was relieved at hearing this but her curiosity got the better of her. "But what if I was gay? What would happen then?"
Buffy chuckled to cover the warm flush she felt as her thoughts entertained what she would do. "If you were gay, I'd still want to be your best friend." Buffy paused. "But a best friend, who also buys you flowers, writes sappy poems too and couldn't keep her hands off of." She finished teasingly.
Willow felt herself blush at the comments. She had never thought of being intimate with a girl before but the suggestion that Buffy would be interested in her in that way was an incredible boost to her ego, especially after the trouncing it had taken with Xander. Needing to change the subject Willow remembered what happened after their dance.
"I saw you go up and talk to Mr. Giles? Do you know him?" Willow watched Buffy's face carefully for her reaction.
"Oh, no...Well kinda. But I just met him today for the first time." Buffy quickly tried to catch up to Willow's change of subject. Again a subject she couldn't talk about.
"So, what did you talk about?" Willow continued to wheedle some information out of Buffy.
"I, uh told him about the conversation I had with that guy who came by." Buffy answered honestly without saying about what.
"You can tell the school librarian something you can't tell me?" Willow couldn't hide the hurt from her voice.
Buffy slapped herself mentally. This honesty thing can be a real pain sometimes she thought. "I told him because it concerned him as well as me. Why it did I can't say." Buffy said quickly in full damage control. "Giles knows about some things. Things I need his help on. He helps me with the things I can't talk about." Buffy offered not believing how lame she sounded.
Willow's hurt turned to concern as her previous thoughts about what kind of danger Buffy could be in returned full force. "It's about the danger you're in." Willow stated.
"Uh, yea." Buffy let it go at that hoping Willow would let it drop. 'God', she thought, 'She must be thinking I'm a real head case about right now.'
Willow turned into the walkway leading up to her front door. They both finished the final steps in quiet. Willow turned to Buffy before going inside. "Buffy, I'm not angry that you can't tell me what's going on. Disappointed, but not angry. But I am worried. I'm worried that my new best friend is going to get hurt and I can't do anything to help."
Buffy was overwhelmed by the concern in Willow's voice. She wanted to hug Willow but restrained herself. "I promise to be careful. Trust me when I say I can take care of myself."
"I don't know why...but I do believe you that you can take care of yourself." Willow paused before making a final plea. "But Buffy, everyone needs help at sometime in their lives. Without it their alone and become lost."
"Yea, so I've been told." Buffy said quietly. But she'd also been told that it was her duty to fight alone. Her alone against the forces of darkness. Why would the council be so adamant about her not sharing her burden with anyone she asked herself, not for the first time.
Buffy shook herself from these dark thoughts. Looking at Willow she smiled. "You have made this the best first day of school ever. Thank you. And you are helping, more than you know."
Willow smiled back, still wanting to do more but grateful that they were parting on an up note. "That's what best friends are for."
"Well can I give my best friend a hug goodnight?" Buffy asked shyly
Willow answered by putting her arms around Buffy's shoulders and drawing her near. As she felt Buffy's answering clasp she finally understood why she had felt uncomfortable with the earlier hugging. The way Buffy held her was more than friendly, somehow intimate. At this thought Willow slowly released her hold and stood back as Buffy's arms dropped to her side.
"Good night. I had a good day also. Definitely different and different of the good. So thank you." Willow turned to go inside as Buffy responded.
"Good night Willow."
As Buffy hurried home, Willow's thoughts turned to how she might still be able to help Buffy. She knew she couldn't help without knowing what the problem was. But Buffy couldn't tell her so she didn't have any idea where to begin. She needed information and as she remembered the evening's events a plan began to form in her active mind. 'I think it's time to find out more about our new school librarian' she thought as she woke up her computer.
A waxing moon held court in the starlit night.
No clouds to disturb its view of events below.
But the moon doesn't care, doesn't see and doesn't hear.
But if it could, the moon would have trembled at the activities this night.
And surely it would have cringed at the mournful wail that emanated from beneath
the earth.
Of such a timbre and range it built and echoed.
Gaining strength as it found its way from caverns deep.
Once in the open air it spread and carried like a plague of locust.
Parents looked up in shock.
Children cowered under their covers.
Dogs put their heads down and whimpered.
Cats hissed and spit.
The master wailed his failure.
The slayer went home to bed.
The master finally stilled his cries and looked around the empty cavern with hate filled eyes. He silently cursed the slayer. Then forced his thoughts away from failure, grateful he had planned. He still felt Timothy, though now far away. This was very good he thought, away from the Slayer and on his way to his Ancient sire. He knew his duty and in this case it might be the only thing that could save him. 'Timothy must reach my sire. The ancients intervention now might be the only thing that would save them all' he thought before his mind turned to the fact that he was now all alone.
Buffy had just kissed her mother good night after sharing the story of her success. As her senses tumbled into slumber she mumbled one last thing with a smile on her lips.
"Good night Willow."
Willow was still awake as the slayer said good night. She had been furiously working on tracking Mr. Giles back to London. The previous night she had quickly accessed his records with the school district. Armed with his vital statistics and the account number at the Bank of London where his salary was automatically deposited she had been carefully setting her route for cracking into the bank's computer system. She had created a web whereby she could access the bank and if discovered, the web would collapse much faster than it could be unraveled. Now she was patiently waiting for her custom written ferret, as she liked to call it, to capture the access codes she needed to unlock the information in Mr. Giles's bank records.
"Gotcha" she said quietly as her automated routine turned around and started extracting everything about the account including all information on any depositors or payees that had accounts with the bank. Because of the convoluted routing she had set up, the information was coming in pieces and being slowly put together as each arrived. After carefully monitoring the system for nearly thirty minutes to make sure her intrusion had not been detected the last bit of information arrived. She silently thanked her parents for getting her the ISDN then immediately sent out the signal for all her daemons to hibernate. Vulnerable ones that could lead back to her self terminated. She looked over at the clock noting the late hour but knew she couldn't sleep without at least scanning what she had. Most everything about his account was normal and boring except for one regular deposit. This deposit happened on the first business day of every month and was four times the salary he received from the school district.
"Wow, he's loaded. What's he doing working as a librarian." Willow said out loud noticing his account balance and the regular transfers to several investment accounts.
Bringing up the records from the account where he was getting the large regular deposit she became more confused. There were large infusions of cash from multiple sources, many of them large international companies whose names she recognized. And nearly two thousand monthly deposits to other accounts just like Mr. Giles. She looked at the name for this account and read it out loud.
"WC LLC" She debated whether or not to begin researching WC LLC right away or wait for tomorrow. After one more look at the clock she decided to put it off for tomorrow night. But that didn't mean she couldn't spend some time in the library tomorrow looking over the rare books collection that Mr. Giles had brought with him.
Buffy arrived early to school and went immediately to the library. There she found Giles sorting through a new arrival of books.
"Hey Giles." She called out cheerily, looking forward to conveying her good news.
Giles looked up noting his young charges happy demeanor. "Good morning Buffy. I take it everything went well last night?"
"Oh better than well. They showed up like clockwork though a bit disorganized. The vessel guy was easy to spot, the symbol you said he would have on his forehead was clear as day. Thanks by the way." Giles acknowledged her gratitude with a slight nod of his head.
"Anyway, when he was about ten feet away from where I was hiding I let loose with the crossbow and he was dust before he even knew what hit him. The rest were so stunned that I got three more before the last two decided to high tail it. Fortunately they stuck together and I had them in just a couple of minutes." Buffy caught her breath before continuing. "Then I went on a full patrol, including the university campus for the first time. Good thing too 'cause I ran across a group of college dead outs that were being led by some blonde bimbo who thought she was the queen of Sheba. I listened in on them for awhile and found out they had quite a racket going. They would find some student that was having problems, snack on him and then steal all his stuff from his dorm. And to top it off they would leave a note from the victim saying he couldn't handle the pressure and just left." Buffy shivered as she remembered the cold fury she had felt upon hearing their plans for their latest target. "I kinda took my time with them, leaving the blonde for last. I wanted her to feel some real fear before I dusted her. Unfortunately I don't think she ever did. She just kept acting all pissed off and put out. Kinda taught me something though. I have to remember that their just soulless demons. I need to just kill them and not get personally involved."
"Anything else?" Giles queried with a slight twinkle in his eye. He was coming to enjoy the manner in which she made her reports. It was very unprofessional but charming none the less.
"Oh yea, the harvest guys. There were only six including the vessel. Guess Angel was off on his count or there is one more running around somewhere." Buffy shrugged lost for any further explanation.
Giles frowned. It made tactical sense to send one for reinforcements or help when faced with imminent destruction he thought. 'A master vampire that would do such a thing would have to have a modicum of humility to admit to possible failure. It was rare, but he had heard of very old vampires who planned for contingencies such as failure, but what kind of help would he send for and how would it manifest itself' he finished this train of thought deciding more research was called for.
"There could be a couple of reasons a master vampire would keep one of his minions out of a battle. It's rare but not unprecedented. I'll need to research it before I can add anything else." Giles finished by taking his glasses from his face to give them a nice wiping with his handkerchief. Returning his glasses to their customary location, he asked Buffy something that had been bothering him.
"Buffy, you've mentioned several times getting close to vampires without them being aware of your presence. Just how do you manage this?"
"Huh?" Buffy responded, surprised that a Watcher would ask such an obvious question.
"Did I not make myself clear?" Giles asked, unsure of the reason for Buffy's confusion.
"No, I understood the question. I just don't understand why you would ask. I mean it was my first watcher, Merrick that taught me the shadows spell. Took me six months to master it and I even got the scent and sound dampening figured out, guess he reported that I was hopeless. But if he hadn't died he would have let you guys know that I finally got the hang of it." Buffy explained a little embarrassed at her admission.
Unsure of how to respond, Giles contained his surprise. "Of course, I just wasn't aware that you had finally mastered that ability. Well congratulation. I'll be sure to let the council know of your success."
Buffy smiled at the compliment. "Well if that's it, time for school." Buffy practically skipped through the library doors.
Giles turned and went into his office, securely closing the door behind him. He didn't want interruptions as he logged the slayer's report and prepared his dispatches for the council. He smiled as he imagined their surprise as they read his latest report.
Several minutes passed before a head with red hair cautiously peeked out from the upper level book stacks. Willow had gotten a lot more than she bargained for when she had decided to arrive early to check out Giles's rare book selection. Feeling a bit like Alice in wonderland she quietly made her way from the library. With one final glance back at the closed office door she made her exit more determined than ever to find out everything she could.
Willow was transfixed by the soft deep red petals held before her face. The outer petals were just beginning to flare outward with a silent promise of more beauty and pleasure within. She flared her nostrils slightly as she tried to catch the scent she knew the rose had to offer. Leaning closer to better capture the sweet fragrance her eyes came to focus on dark green eyes that watched her attentively. Slowly she brought her lips to the exquisite offering, never moving her eyes from the ones watching her. As her lips reached their destination she marveled in the silky softness that caressed her. She gently clasped the small smooth hand holding the rose stem and closed the distance to the owner of that hand. She guided the rose until it was the only thing separating their yearning lips. Carefully she moved her hand down, slowly removing this final barrier from her goal. Lips touched and from deep within a rising moan riding the crest of anticipated pleasure was unceremoniously shattered by her alarm clock. Groaning in frustration she fumbled with the clock radio, finally silencing it.
"Wow!" She spoke aloud attempting to recapture the feelings that were being blown away by the winds of consciousness. 'Oh my god,' She thought quietly. 'Only three weeks and I'm dreaming of kissing her. This can't be happening. I'm straight! I even told her so. So why is this happening? Damn hormones must figure that they're not going to get satisfied by any guy so they focus on the next best thing.' Willow grabbed her pillow smushing it to her face as she groaned in confusion. Unable to stop her train of thoughts they continued to course through her mind unbidden. 'But would it really be the next best thing? My fantasies of Xander never made me feel this... way, this wanting, excited, damnit, this aroused. What was it she said? Something about gay people figure it out at different times in their lives. Yea, some as kids and others not until after their married with kids. That's what she said!'
Willow rolled over on her side, willing to get out of bed and start her day. Wanting to go about her normal routine so as to distract her from her current line of thought. But she didn't make it any further than sticking one slender foot out from under her covers as she began to go over the last three weeks of her life.
The memories unfolded, like a treasured photo album. And just like browsing through treasured photo's she would stop and remember fondly. Mostly she remembered the Saturdays they spent together. A day at the movies followed by way too much ice cream, topped off with mochas. Then a picnic to a place in the woods Willow wouldn't have believed existed. A place where they could let a cool running stream tickle their bare feet and they talked of hopes and shared some fears. And just before things could get too heavy, the quirky jokes that Buffy would make. Catapulting them both into fits of non stop jokes and laughter.
'It's been the best three weeks of my life.' Willow realized, the thought making her sit up in her bed. Then the other memories came. The ones of how every night and nearly all day on Sundays she had unraveled the mystery of Buffy's other life. The one she couldn't talk about. The one where she risks her life nightly to protect her and everyone else in the world.
Research that had finally culminated in breaking into the Watcher's Council email system. And with that memory came apprehension as she remembered what she had discovered. Getting out of bed and going over to her desk she began to read again the printed words that had caused her such anxiety.
18/03/1997 14:23:02
To: Jonathan Smyth
From: Niles York
Jonathan,
Quentin just completed reviewing Rupert's latest dispatches with us and I regret to inform you that early measures may be invoked.
The slayer, Buffy Summers, successes are so extraordinary that it is only a matter of time before she draws the attention of the ancient's. Apparently Merrick went against Council edicts and trained the slayer in magik's and strategy that have made her far too formidable. It is unfortunate that we must take measures because she performs her calling too well, but the consequences of her reaching maturity are too great to risk.
You are to make contact with the ancient's representative but at this time do not volunteer any information. If they raise the issue assure them that the Council will keep the Covenant. You are then to report all they say and await further instructions.
If action becomes necessary, the Council will prepare the Codex. You are to plan and execute the delivery.
Niles York
Assistant Counsel
19/03/1997 09:42:17
To: Niles York
From: Jonathan Smyth
Niles,
The ancient's representative contacted me the day following your previous message. I regret to inform you that they are very aware of the slayer's successes and in no uncertain terms demanded her early retirement. As instructed, I assured him that the Council would keep the Covenant.
I then informed him that the ancient's request would be immediately presented to the Council and he would be informed of the Council's remedy. He then insisted on immediate action. At this point his demeanor faltered and I realized that he was afraid. I can only speculate as can you at what would instill such fear.
While I realized that it would be catastrophic to deny their demands, I can't help but take some small measure of satisfaction in making them wait as long as possible.
I will patiently await your reply,
Jonathan Smyth
Region Counsel
24/03/1997 22:11:56
To: Jonathan Smyth
From: Niles York
Jonathan,
The Council echoes your sentiments. You are instructed to advise the ancient's representative that the Council is making the preparations to fulfill their request.
Inform them that due to the unusual circumstances of the slayer living with her mother and leading an open life, we must be more circumspect than usual. To insure that no foul play is suspected their request cannot be carried out any earlier than eight weeks hence.
I and the Council are confident in your ability to make certain that they accept this timetable.
The codex is being prepared and will be delivered to you by courier with sufficient time for you to execute transfer to its ultimate destination.
A final word of caution. Rupert must be kept as unaware of our plans as the slayer herself.
Niles York
Assistant Counsel
Willow completed reading, slightly aware of the warm tears silently making their way across her cheeks. An emotion she had never experienced before in her life quickly built within her until with fiery purpose it consumed her. Fear and pain were placed away. Hot rage cooled into tempered determination and an overwhelming need to protect.
'I've got eight weeks to figure out how to save Buffy.' She told herself. Indecision collapsed as she began to plan on how to save her best friend.
"And maybe, just maybe...more." She whispered just before launching into a flurry of activity so she could get to school.
Willow's thoughts were so focused she didn't hear her name being called. With quick strides she made her way, occasionally bumping against other students until a hand grasped her shoulder. She turned around to see Xander's worried face.
"Didn't you hear me? I've been yelling your name for the last five minutes trying to get you to stop. What's going on with you?" Xander's voice swiftly changed from concern to a more demanding tone, conveying a touch of anger.
Willow's mind went into turmoil at having these demanding questions hurled at her unprepared. But the turmoil passed quickly as her previous thoughts again took the forefront.
"Xander, I'm sorry I didn't hear you but I've got a lot on my mind right now. And I just can't talk right now; I have some things I need to do." As Willow turned away to leave she missed the anger on her friends face but not the words hurled at her back.
"Things to do with Buffy? Just what kind of things Willow? Girl things or girl/girl things..." He let the words hang accusingly.
Brought up short by the vitriolic tone and words Willow snapped around to glare at Xander, disbelief covered her face like a shroud.
"What are you talking about?" She demanded quietly while moving closer to him so as to keep their voices low.
"I may not be smart Will, but I'm not stupid." Xander practically hissed at her. "You've spent nearly every free minute you've got with Buffy. And the few times we've talked, all you do is talk about her." He paused while gauging her reaction. Still seeing only confusion there he plowed on. "I'm not the only one noticing either. You and Buffy are the main topic on the gossip circuit. Did you know that Buffy has turned down offers from some of the most popular guys in school, including Owen?" Xander felt particular satisfaction over this bit of news and had been only to happy to share.
Willow shook her head in complete confusion, not able or not willing to understand where Xander's news was leading.
"So I've been spending time with a new friend. Why is that worthy of gossip?" Willow demanded.
"Oh come on Will. You were seen coming out of Breaker's woods holding hands with Buffy, the both of you giggling and looking like the two of you had been going at it hot and heavy." Xander accused, raising his eyebrows for emphasis.
"Whaaa..." Willow stopped dumbstruck. As the words sank in she felt the blood drain from her face. "But we're just friends. There's nothing going on." Willow's words trailed off as unbidden, the memory of her dream came rushing back. A memory that caused her to flush but also to instill her with the confidence to respond.
"Xander, nothing like you are suggesting has happened between Buffy and me. We've talked. We've laughed. And I've had the three most wonderful weeks of my life. All by doing nothing more than being a friend to someone who is being a real friend in return. And if bigoted idiots want to make something more of it, then tough. It doesn't change the truth." Willow began to turn thinking she had had her say. But anger at Xander's seeming betrayal caused her to turn and respond once more. "I thought you were my best friend. But I just didn't know what real friendship was about. Now I know what a real friend is..." She let her words hang for a moment while she fixed Xander with a steely look. "And I know what a real friend isn't" She finished pointedly. Continuing her stare for another heartbeat, she then turned and walked away. Her head held high unaware and for the time being uncaring of the defeated and hurt expression on her childhood friend's face.
Buffy closed her locker, pausing for a moment listening to the whispered voices. Forcing herself to turn casually, she walked down the hall ignoring the looks and outright stares she was receiving.
'Three days of gossip and still they can't find anything better to talk about.' She thought disgustedly. Then she caught sight of Willow, standing almost rigid with an expression that would make stone look alive. Buffy carefully watched people stop and stare as she approached her best friend. Stares from simple curiosity to glares of outright hatred. 'God, what did I do to deserve her?' She asked herself. Buffy's heart ached at the pain that Willow had to endure because of their friendship. Buffy was only a couple of steps from where Willow waited for her when a large mass wearing a letterman's jacket roughly bumped into Willow, knocking her to her knees.
"Out of the way ya fucking dyke." Was loudly proclaimed to one and all. The speaker had started to turn to look with satisfaction at his victim but the sight of the helpless girl on the floor was denied him. What he experienced instead was the briefest feeling of being airborne and then incredible pain as his back and head made contact with a row of lockers. As he slumped to the floor sharp waves of agony washed over him, blurring his vision. He vaguely noticed an arm extended towards his chest and felt his body rising into the air.
Willow was on her knees when startled by the loud slamming sound of a heavy object striking metal. Seeing Buffy grabbing her assailant and lifting him into the air she leapt forward, throwing her arms around Buffy's. At the moment she made contact with her friends body, Buffy froze, her body locked like a statue of bronze and just as hard.
"Buffy, I'm OK." Willow spoke desperately, needing to get the angry girls attention before she caused any more damage.
Buffy slowly turned her head. Her anger slipping when confronted with the desperate, pleading look. "But he hurt you." Buffy mumbled between clenched teeth.
Willow was consumed by these simple words. She felt something she had never felt before in her entire life. Safe, comforted, protected all wrapped up in one wonderful package. She felt truly loved. Willow smiled.
The smile worked magic. Buffy's hand released the barely conscious body and Buffy's body relaxed, the anger washed away.
"Buffy, we need to go. And then we need to talk." Willow spoke quietly for fear that she would be heard in the sudden quiet of the school hallway.
"Oh, OK." Buffy agreed quietly and allowed herself to be lead down the hall and outside by her friend.
As they left the school behind Buffy's thoughts began to settle down. As they settled down, the recent events began to wash over her, bringing rise to panic as she realized what she had done. And not in the dark of night and shadows, but in the cold light of day in front of dozens of fellow students. Panic seized on a way out.
"Willow, did you see what happened?" Buffy asked timidly.
Willow looked at her friend, recalling the events that only lasted seconds. "Not the first part. I only heard the sound he made after you threw him into the lockers. I only saw you lifting him off the ground about to make a pancake out of his face."
"Oh, guess I kinda lost it." Buffy replied lamely. "I thought he hurt you and when I saw him stop I thought he was going to hurt you some more." Buffy looked cautiously at Willow, mildly surprised to see a slight smile beginning at the corner of Willow's lips. "And then I must have gotten one of those adrenalin rushes. You know, like the ones mothers get so they can lift a car and save their baby's life." Buffy finished, desperation clearly tainting the small fib.
Willow giggled while looking Buffy in the eye with a conspiratorial look. "Yea and I guess being the slayer had nothing to do with it."
Buffy was all of a sudden certain that the earth and cosmos were moving at incredible speeds. She knew because she felt them all come to an abrupt stop. Buffy's insides felt the gut wrenching effects of inertia when her universe came to an abrupt halt. Willow halted also, and turned to see the near apoplectic expression on Buffy's face.
Willow smiled reassuringly. "Not here Buffy. I've got some things to show you and then we need to talk." Willow then linked her arm with Buffy's gently encouraging her friend to begin moving again.
As she felt Willow's arm gently urging her to move, she slowly began to move her feet forward. Her mind slowly began to groan and grind its way into motion a few minutes later. As her thoughts gained speed they so consumed her concentration that she was unprepared when she felt Willow sitting her down on a chair not understanding how they had arrived at Willow's house so quickly.
Willow waited patiently, slowly stroking Buffy's hands. 'Guess I shouldn't have surprised her like that.' She thought, now concerned that she had put her friend into shock.
Buffy slowly became aware of a soothing feeling, traveling from her hand and up her arm. A feeling that seeped into her riotous thoughts and bringing more of her focus to her surrounding. She felt herself blink her eyes. Then she blinked them a couple more times. With each blink things became a little clearer until she could see Willow with a very concerned look on her face.
Willow saw that Buffy's eyes were now focused on her. "Buffy? Are you going to be OK?" She asked softly so as not to startle her.
"Yea, Uh...yea, OK, I mean I'm OK." Buffy stumbled over her words like they were foreign objects.
"Good. Now take your time and when you're ready, I have some things to tell you. I need you to just listen while I talk." Willow stressed this last part before going on. "After I've told you everything, I then have something you need to read. After that, we can talk and you can ask all the questions you need to." Willow allowed a few moments for her words to sink in and then asked. "OK?"
Buffy's thoughts were much too chaotic to form an intelligent question at the moment so she just nodded her head.
Willow pulled up the spare chair and sat facing her with their knees touching. Taking a deep breath she began her tale.
"Well, it all started that first day. The day we met. After you dropped me at my house I couldn't stop thinking how you might be in danger." Willow paused, gathering her thoughts and then launched into her tale. "I wanted to help you but I didn't know how. So I remembered that you said Mr. Giles knew things that helped you. So I thought I would find out about Mr. Giles. At the time I was thinking that if I knew how Mr. Giles helped you I could maybe help in the same way. Anyway, I found out that being a librarian was just a cover. Mr. Rupert Giles is actually employed by the Watcher's Council as a Watcher." Willow paused again as she saw Buffy's eyes become round as saucers. Averting her gaze momentarily from Buffy's she continued on. "So I researched watchers and the council and found out what they watched." Willow smiled shyly at the vision. "I had also gotten to school early the morning after that first night to check out the ancient books he had brought. I was back in the book stacks when you came in. I overheard you and Giles talking about your previous night's slayings."
Buffy's eyes closed when she heard this and her mouth dropped open slightly. She had to force herself to concentrate as Willow continued her tale.
"My research uncovered a lot of material that was considered myth. But after establishing a few known facts, such as Slayers are real. Vampires and demons are real. Slayers defend the world against these threats and the council trains and guide the Slayers."
Willow noticed Buffy shaking her head slowly, her eyes down cast. Ignoring Buffy's consternation for the time being, she continued.
"The hardest thing to uncover was information about the Watcher's Council. Separating fact from fiction was really difficult. But I became determined when I discovered that no known slayer had ever survived her eighteenth year."
Buffy's head snapped up upon hearing this. Clearly something that had been kept from her thought Willow as she again halted her tale.
"The more I read the more I became suspicious. Then I hit pay dirt. I got into the Council's email system."
Willow now paused from her narration. Going over to her desk, she picked up the emails she had printed out. Slowly turning, she approached Buffy, extending the three pieces of paper, stacked in chronological order.
Buffy stared at the paper extended before her, sudden dread filling her veins like ice water. Feeling like someone being handed a death sentence, she glanced up at Willow, startled to see tears freely running down her friends face.
"Please Buffy. Read these before you do or say anything else."
Buffy carefully reached for the papers, tentatively grasping them and then placed them on her lap.
Willow wanted desperately to turn her back. She couldn't bear to watch Buffy read of the council's betrayal. But she didn't want Buffy to feel alone in this so stood her ground quietly. Patiently waiting for whatever would come.
Buffy read the first page, slowly at first and then again more quickly. Glancing up quickly at Willow's tear streaked face; she turned her attention to the second page.
"Damn." Softly left Buffy's lips, softly but with the power of a true curse.
Buffy read with the final page as her own tears, ones born on the wings of betrayal, began to well up in her eyes. Looking up into the face of the messenger, grief and fear overwhelmed her.
"They're going to kill me." The papers slipped from her numb fingers as she slowly fell forward onto the floor. All her strength vanishing in the wake of being betrayed.
Willow practically fell to the ground in her efforts to get to Buffy's shaking form. Gathering her up in her arms she held her as if her life depended upon it.
"No. They're not going to kill you. I won't let them." Willow spoke with force, her voice rising with each word.
"Willow, they're so powerful. How can you stop them? It's just not possible. I can't run away. As long as I live, they'll keep hunting me." Buffy sobbed into Willow's shoulder.
Stroking Buffy's hair, Willow gatherer her wits. "This is where we talk Buffy. I have a plan."
Buffy slowly pulled herself from Willow's arms. Sitting back a little with her face only inches from her friends. Thinking she knew what Willow was planning she revealed what she perceived was the flaw. "Willow, there's something you need to know. A slayer is called when..."
"I know Buffy." Willow cut her off. "A new slayer is called when the previous slayer dies."
Buffy now looked confused. "So if you know, then you know that as long as a new slayer hasn't been called, they'll know I'm alive."
Willow's face became incredibly serious. A resolute look the like of which Buffy had never seen before. On anyone, let alone her friend. "If a new slayer is called, then they'll believe that you're dead. Doesn't mean you are, just that you died." Willow paused while Buffy digested this concept.
"But if I die, wouldn't I be dead?" Buffy hadn't quite grasped Willow's plan.
"Yes, but you don't have to stay dead." Willow allowed a slight smile to curl her mouth. "Happens hundreds of times every day. We just need to figure out the best way for you to die very temporarily."
Buffy slowly considered what Willow had said but her tactical sense quickly uncovered a problem. "If they are planning on killing me, they'll be there to make sure I'm dead. How are you going to get around that? And what about a body?"
Willow's smile turned a little smug. She got up and went to her desk, returning with another letter. Sitting down, she proudly presented the letter.
Buffy couldn't help but grin a little herself seeing the proud look on Willow's face. Taking the paper she read a fourth email.
02/04/1997 12:16:41
To: Sebastian Childress
From: Jonathan Smyth
Sebastian,
I have a mission of the utmost importance for you. You must make contact with the soul'd vampire Angelus. Let him know that you can obtain the Codex.
The Codex has been prepared with a prophesy. Simply stated, the Master will rise and the Slayer will face him and die. As you know, a Codex prophesy isn't effective until the Codex is read by someone unaware that it's a spell which produces a prophesy.
Angel, as he prefers to be called must deliver the Codex to Rupert Giles. Once Rupert has read the prophesy, it will come to pass within forty-eight hours. We need Rupert's confirmation that he read the prophesy. If for some reason the body is not recovered, this confirmation along with the confirmation of a new slayer being called should be sufficient to quell the ancient's fears.
I will expect you within the week to hand the Codex over to you.
Jonathan Smyth
Region Counsel
Buffy read the message twice more as it began to sink in. Looking at Willow's anticipatory smile she barely whispered her hope. "They're not going to be there. And they're prepared to not find a body." Buffy paused, troubled once again. "But the prophesy says a vampire is going to kill me? And once a vampire kills you it's kinda permanent," Buffy's eyes flew wide. "Unless they turn you, in which case I'd rather stay dead."
Willow was ready to spring her final surprise on Buffy. "Buffy, it's not a real prophesy but a spell. And spells can be broken. And thanks to 'Rupert's' wonderful collection, I know how to break the spell." Willow smiled sweetly.
Buffy slowly returned Willow's smile. "I'm beginning to believe this could work. So tell me everything so I can really believe that I'm not going to be dead in eight weeks."
Willow paused, this was the scary part. The part where she had to make the most important decision of her life. One which would alter her life in a way that could never be changed back.
Buffy became concerned as Willow delayed. The worry on her friends face was slowly turning her own to dread. Smiles were a distant memory as Buffy finally encouraged Willow to go on.
"Will, you're wiggin me out here." Startled, Willow realized she couldn't delay any longer.
"Buffy, they're some small pieces that still need to be worked out but they're just details. But there's one big piece that could mean the difference between success and failure. Until today I wasn't sure if I could do what was necessary to insure success. But now I am. I just need to know one last thing before I decide." Willow paused, actually waiting for Buffy to give her some last bit of encouragement before continuing.
Buffy didn't fail her. "What Will, what do you need to know?"
Willow took Buffy's hands gently into her own. Softly caressing the back of Buffy's hands with her thumbs she took a deep breath and made the plunge. "Do you love me?"
Buffy gasped. She had spent nearly four weeks trying to ignore her ever growing feelings for the beautiful girl in front of her. Not sure of what Willow was looking for, she responded honestly but safely. "Of course I love you, you're my best friend."
Willow needed a better answer. And she didn't want to play twenty questions to get it either. "Buffy, no matter how you answer, I will always be your friend, you're best friend. But I really need a complete answer so let me rephrase the question... Are you in love with me?"
Buffy felt torn, part of her was jumping for joy that she would finally be able to tell Willow how she really felt. The other part was afraid of the very possible rejection, crushing her hopes once and for all time. But this was important to Willow. "Yes, I'm in love with you." She answered the question, her voice husky with emotion.
Willow exhaled the breath she had been holding. She squeezed Buffy's hands excited and scared of what she was about to say.
"Then kiss me."
Willow's simple words hung in the air like a feather caught in an updraft. Buffy was captivated as she felt the invitation float in the air. Leaning forward ever so slowly, wanting this moment to last for as long as possible.
Two pairs of eyes closed as lips touched. Gently they moved, slightly parted beginning a slow dance. Careful exploration began to elicit quickening hearts and breathing. Their lips moved to the quickening tempo. Heavy breathing turned to moans of pleasure as hands entwined in each others hair. Warm, moist tongues joined the dance, turning a slow waltz into a tango. Willow chased Buffy's tongue with her own as she felt Buffy slowly pull away. Buffy placed feather light kisses all over her face, sending little jolts of pleasure across her face with each tender touch. Holding Willow's head between her hands, Buffy pulled back, her lips a mere inch from Willow's.
"I answered your question." Buffy managed to gasp. "What was the decision you needed to make and what did you decide?"
With difficulty, Willow forced her aroused passions back slightly, just far enough to answer Buffy's question.
"I needed to decide if I was going to go with you." Buffy's heart flip flopped hearing this. "And I decided yes, because I realized today that I'm in love with you. I was pretty sure you were in love with me, I just needed to be sure." Willow smiled, and then licked her lips slowly. "Now can we get back to the kissing?"
Buffy didn't even pause for breath as she returned her lips to where they belonged.
Stark, stripped, cold, even bathed in the morning sunlight, everything seemed lifeless. The tall powerful evergreens, their bases caressed by well trimmed green grass had no life. People moved and their voices carried a semblance of life, but it was all false. After three weeks he was left with only a numbing emptiness that made everything dead around. Three weeks since Willow told him he wasn't her friend.
Xander Harris knew he acted on his emotions. Thinking things through before he spoke just wasn't something that he did. 'What I feel tells me what to say.' He had stubbornly hung to this concept. He did so because he didn't trust his brain to ever come up with anything intelligible. He had been told by everyone, everyone except Willow, that he wasn't smart. But he had a quick wit which he used to mask his insecurity over his lack of brain power.
'I wasn't reasonable with her.' He finally admitted to himself. But felt more frustrated, being reasonable meant using reason. And to use reason, he would actually have to think things through, something that he had avoided doing for a long time. Thus the depression and headache as he had spent the last week and a half thinking about why he acted the way he had. He didn't like the conclusion he came up with either. While admittedly this thinking thing was pretty new to him, it did make sense. A lot more sense than what his emotions were telling him. While his emotions were telling him that he was just watching out for his naive friend, reason and logic indicated something much deeper was at work.
He took a deep breath and looked at his watch again. Five more minutes to figure things out before final period ended. Then maybe a couple more until Willow walks out the front doors of the school. His thoughts returned to where they had left off as he considered once again his motivations. He had come to realize how important Willow was to him. How much he needed her in his life. After accepting this and reviewing how he had taken her for granted the last couple of years, he had felt ashamed. Ashamed because he had ignored the wonderful girl right in front of him and how he had hurt her while chasing after every girl that wasn't her. He had finally worked everything out and was now ready to make things right. He just hoped he wasn't too late.
His thoughts and breathing stopped as the first students began to exit the main building. He carefully forced himself to breath deep and slowly, cautioning himself to remain calm and not lose control. And then, there she is and he wondered how he never realized how beautiful she is. He barely even noticed the petite blond at her side as he approached her.
"Willow?" He said her name as calmly as his anxious nerves allowed, watching expectantly as she turned and focused her sparkling green eyes in his direction.
"Xander." Willow replied, her voice cautious as her hand reached out unbidden for support from Buffy, which was immediately provided as Buffy clasped their hands together.
Xander's eyes flickered downwards, feeling an ache deep within seeing how Willow reached for support from someone other than himself. Xander willed his well rehearsed words from his mouth.
"I wanted to apologize. Can we go somewhere and talk?" Xander's question was leaning towards pleading, reflecting the look in his eyes.
Willow felt immediate relief at her old friends' apology. She cared for him deeply but their last conversation had left her feeling betrayed and very hurt. A chance at reconciling their dispute and reclaiming her friend was something she desperately wanted.
Turning to Buffy with the unasked question in her eyes made the blond girl smile. Buffy had spent hours consoling Willow after her previous meeting with Xander. In the process she had come to learn and appreciate the special friendship they shared. Giving Willow an encouraging smile she answered the question.
"Go ahead, and take all the time you need. I'll wait for you."
Willow mouthed a silent thank you and turned back to Xander.
"Yea Xander, let's go talk."
Buffy watched the two old friends walk away with the hope that her love could heal this rift in her life.
Xander stopped when the reached a quiet area covered by three enormous trees. Turning slowly he began his efforts to get Willow back in his life.
"I've been a real idiot Will, for a very long time," Taking a quick breath he continued. "and a real ass recently. I'm really sorry for the things I said. I was just missing you and got angry."
Running his hand through his hair to calm his nerves he then continued. "And you know I'm not much with the thinking before talking so I spoke to hurt you like I felt you were hurting me."
Willow frowned as she listened. It was unlike Xander to be introspective and wasn't sure if this was leading somewhere good. She decided to remain silent and let Xander have his say, mostly because she didn't really know how to respond to a Xander that was trying to explain his motivations.
"I never meant to hurt you, but I know I did. And you were right to be angry, where my anger wasn't." Xander's voice became softer and more filled with emotion as he continued to share his recent self discovery.
"After you walked away I was totally shocked that you would question our friendship. I started off feeling that you were totally off base." He paused momentarily as his thought and feelings began a battle for release. "Then the shock wore off and depression set in. I began to think about our friendship, from the very beginning but mostly the past couple of years."
Here goes nothing he thought quietly. "And I came to realized how badly I've ignored your feelings those last couple of years. How I took you for granted and stopped appreciating what a good friend you were to me. You've always supported and encouraged me. And I came to expect it without realizing that it was