Waiting for Dani

by JustSkipIt

Copyright © 2006

Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own Willow and Tara and the Buffyverse. I'm not saying this universe is totally original but I didn't steal it from any author or creator that I know of. No copyright infringement is meant by this fic and I will not make any money from it.
Distribution: The Mystic Muse http://mysticmuse.net
Feedback: Yes, please. Please leave feedback on the Waiting for Dani thread on the Kitten Board.
Spoilers: None.
Author's Note: I expect this story will have 7-10 total updates. Right now I have four written and intend to post every week to start then possibly will drop to every other week.
I don't like the title very much but I think that I like it better than my alternative title: "My girl'. If you have a suggestion, PM me and maybe I'll use yours and give you credit.
If you have any questions, please ask.
I love you, Rachel and Asher.
Webhost's Note: Special thanks goes to Chris Cook of Through the Looking Glass, MKF and Artemis for the graphic at the top of the page. Thanks, Chris!
Pairing: Willow/Tara

Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4    Part 5    Part 6    Part 7    Part 8    Part 9    Part 10    Part 11    Part 12    Part 13    Part 14    Part 15    Part 16    Part 17

Part 1
Waiting

I sit in the dark, my knees pulled up high in front of me and my arms wrapped around them. I am looking out the window into the darkness but not seeing. I could light a candle or twenty but I can't work up the will to do it. My girl, my new girl, will be up shortly. She will, no doubt, make haste in putting the room to order-light the lamps, pull me from my chair and tidy my hair and dress, fold down the bed, take me from the room and offer me any number of delicacies. The quail have been quite rich and plentiful this season or there's always duck. She whistles as she works which is more irritating than it should be.

Everything is in question. And that I, being who I am, is sitting in this state is against everything I've known. Against my family and breeding and what is so in this world. Maclays don't sit in the darkness waiting for their destiny to come to them. Maclays go after their destiny. Hunt it down. Own their destiny. For always and ever. But not this Maclay and not this day.

Perhaps I should explain who I am.

I am Tara Maclay.

I am Lady T'ra Maclay, magic practitioner and daughter of Lady T'rese Maclay, magic practitioner and daughter of Lady T'bitha Moster, magic practitioner. First daughter to Lady T'rese Maclay through Lord D'vid Maclay, first son of Lady T'my Maclay, magic practitioner.

If I were attending a coronation, ball, or other formal event, my title would be longer but I think you get the picture, as it were.

I have 20 summers to my age and most of this autumn season behind me. A few months ago I would have been out riding or hunting at this time of day. But the days are short and the air has turned cold and the chill has crept into this room. Oh yes, I'm sure my girl will stoke the fire when she comes.

Speaking of the devil, I hear her heavy step on the stairs now. I must remember to train her to tread more lightly. Or ask D'ni to do it.

But then, if D'ni was here, I wouldn't be sitting in the dark now would I?

My father's love for my mother was legendary. Literally. The song, which I heard from before I could walk or talk or crawl, before I took my first breath in this world, tells of their first meeting and subsequent second meeting.

My grandfather, Lord D'mitri Maclay, was six moons still from the heart spasm which killed him and placed my father as Lord Maclay. The estate was in good order, the skies were clear, and my father decided to go hunting in the afternoon, taking with him only three men-one his mark-bonded servant-the other two gamesmen of the estate. They began by tracking a stag but realized after a few hours that they were not the predators from which the stag flew. Rather, they found themselves chasing an elusive blue panther-so named for the fur so black it appeared blue in the sunlight. Eventually they dismounted and left my father's man with the horses, instructing him to follow closely enough that he could hear them. My father's man, unlike this new girl, could lead four horses through dense forest without so much as snapping a twig.

The wood wound and wound in on itself in such a way that at times the men felt they had entered a fairy world. At others they felt sure they should be back to where they started, but everywhere they looked, they saw something new. My father had hunted and explored these woods many times as had each of his companions. He considered the land his flesh, the trees his bones, and the rivers his blood so much a part of the Maclay family was it. But this was an entirely new land-one on which he was sure he'd never ventured before. All three men began to feel that the large cat was playing a game with them, leading them to some unknown destination. If not for the position of the sun, they would have sworn that they had been days or weeks in the wood. Their rations had run out and they now sought fresh water along with their prey. They were not only unwilling to give up the chase but suspected that they were also unable.

One of the gamesmen passed close to a towering oak tree and tore his heavy leather jacket, suffering a deep cut on his arm. He swore the rest of his life that the tree had moved to bite him and that only his quick movement allowed him to keep his arm.

My father could feel the fear building in his hunting party and knowing his responsibilities in such a situation, he did as he felt required: he reassured them that the cat had a purpose and that to doubt that purpose was to doubt The Creator herself. More than once, he stopped the group to offer supplication to the forest and sky. He vowed that when they found water he would know his life entire. All three men agreed that when he made this vow, the cat turned slowly around and looked at him. Then it turned and bounded away once again.

Discarding any thoughts of keeping quiet, the men set off at a run to chase the cat. Their bows and arrows were safely tucked into the quivers on their backs and each had a scabbard with a short dagger in his boot. While the woods were generally safe, one could never be completely assured of the safety of the Lord's son. Why in the past few months they had heard rumblings of a land battle in the Northern territories. It had not happened yet, but those who followed such things expected a battle in the next few seasons.

The men ran and ran, bounding up a winding path and climbing higher and higher into the side of a cliff. Blood seeped from the injured man's arm to the ground but there was no stopping. Finally all four men, my father's servant having abandoned any pretense of following quietly, burst into a clearing. They stopped smartly, their shock evident on their faces.

In the clearing, at the edge of a crystal clear stream sat a girl-my mother it should be no surprise. Her right hand, she extended palm side toward the men, showing her mark. The panther was nestled against her knee as if he was a harmless housecat and her left hand was just in front of the panther's mouth. Suspended in mid-air in front of the panther and obviously extending from my mother's power was a small bowl, made of nothing but crystal clear water. A waterfall came from her left hand into the bowl and the spill-over from the bowl fell into the stream.

My father and his men immediately bowed deeply and held their position for three heart-beats. The one mark-bound servant, D'rek, fell to his knees, bowed, and stayed there. The others extended their left hands in a mirror of my mother's action. While the marks on my father's hand were extensive and elaborate, indicating his great wealth and lineage, they paled to those he saw before him. He quickly assessed, seeing that she was third in a direct line of magic users, unmarried, first daughter of a Lord and Lady. My mother assessed a similar strength in his marks and then both seemed to take in all of the other: faces, bodies, the very air around them.

"Prrr says that you came between her and her dinner," my mother said quietly. The panther's name sounded more like the sound a big cat makes than a name but my father and his men understood.

Again he bowed deeply. "Please let her know that we are very sorry. We did not know she lived in this wood."

My mother looked at the cat for a few moments, then smiled and nodded. "This is not our usual way but the wood looked so beautiful that we decided to…explore." As she spoke she moved her hand and the bowl slowly dissolved into the stream from which it had come. She dropped both hands into her lap. After a moment she stood and straightened her skirt, brushing the grass and dirt from it.

"Please," my father asked, "may we see you home?"

The cat and my mother each let out a small giggle at the request but did not insult my father with an outright laugh. "I would be honored but we may move faster than you can keep up. Please come Thursday next." Before my father could answer, she and the cat had vanished into the trees.

None of the men spoke although my father motioned that his man could get up as he stared at the spot where the woman had disappeared. "Everyone saw that right?" He turned to his companions. When they nodded he smiled. "I'm going to marry that woman."

His hunting partners guffawed and clapped him on the back. "Of course you are young Maclay! Hip hip!" Seeing that my father would have nothing to think of but this woman until he saw her again, they gave up their holiday and mounted their horses for home.

Once home, my father could speak of nothing but the beautiful and powerful woman he had met. He hadn't even found out her name or given his but he knew that they could meet again. The next Thursday a traveling expedition set out from my grandfather's estate. The processional included my grandfather and grandmother, my father and his three brothers, his sister T'solde, a crew of over 20 free men and mark-bound servants, and the most highly regarded bard in all the land. All rode the finest horses, in full dress regalia. They brought with them a meal of 7 pigs, 30 chickens, 3 cows, countless bushels of corn, wheat, and berries. Wagons in the rear brought barrels of ale and bottles of fine wine, the finest made on my grandfather's estate.

My grandmother, Lady T'my Maclay, a powerful magic practitioner, led the expedition from a perch atop her elephant. She asked no direction from my father nor communicated any information regarding their journey. Just behind my grandmother rode my father's sister T'Solde, now Lady of a neighboring Estate and herself a powerful force of magic. Following her was my grandfather, then my father and his brothers on their horses. Each woman and man's mark-bound servant rode along side him or her, ½ horse-lengths back. The rest of the caravan was comprised of the servants and free-men who worked for my family.

At high noon exactly according to the family astronomer, my grandmother atop her elephant stepped into the same clearing in which my father had met my mother. She stopped her animal and waited as the rest of the processional assumed appropriate positions next to or behind her, mark-bound servants bowing their heads to the ground. Those who possessed noble marks on their hands extended their hands in front of them to display their position and introduce their arrival.

Arrayed in front of them, in every piece of finery they seemed to possess, was my mother's family. My maternal grandmother, Lady T'bitha Moster, stood a position of honor and leadership mirroring my father's mother. To her immediate right was my mother and next to her, my mother's sister, Melanie. To her left, her husband, Lord Moster (my grandfather), and their sons. Like my father's family, my mother's had brought numerous employees and mark-bound servants.

The assemblage stood still for a number of minutes, studying the marks on each other's hands. As now, then, the practice of reading marks of nobility served as an introduction. By studying the elaboration, design, and extent of the marks, you can learn a person's nobility, rank, lineage, and power. My grandfathers could note each other's rank as Lord not only by the elaboration and decoration of their family crest but by the dark prints on each of their fingertips and thumb. My grandmothers likewise held five prints as well as indication of their magical power and lineage. My mother's hand showed even greater magical power and lineage than her mother's but only four prints, indicating a non-Lady but magic practitioner. My father's hand also showed four prints, declaring him to be the future Lord Maclay as did my mother's oldest brother. Others – my uncles and aunts – held three prints.

I can remember as a child studying my hand. I would turn the right palm toward myself and trace it with the fingertips of my left hand. What would my marks look like? When would I get them? How would they appear? Before I understood what it would take to receive them, I thought they would spontaneously appear. At my father's knee as he read a story, I held and studied the marks on his left hand, tracing each line and curlicue with my fingertips. Now I can trace the marks which completely fill my palm and fingers. Unmarried, still I have been Lady Maclay - holding five prints - since the taking of my marks. I've seen reproductions of my mother's marks and they were beautiful indeed. Mine is more elaborate still than either of my parents as befits a fourth- generation magic practitioner, Lady of the estate, first daughter of the Lord of the estate. The closest mark I've ever seen is that on the back of my father's hand-the marriage marks which intertwined his marks with my mothers. Mine are more elaborate still than those. Even now, I'm not sure I fully understand the magic bound within the marks.

And D'ni's marks? So like mine, but not on her hand. She took her marks shortly after mine. But that's another tale. For another time.

The inspection completed and marks obviously approved, my grandmother's servant sensed her wishes and quickly placed a step next to her elephant so that my grandmother could dismount. The rest of the party followed suit and as one bowed to their counterparts, holding the bow for the necessary and respectful three heartbeats. When they stood again, my mother's family returned the honor-their action indicating an acceptance of the meeting.

At the command of my grandmothers and their mark-bound servants, the servants and workers quickly dispersed to their duties in preparing the lodging and feast. My father's and mother's brothers gathered and mounted a hunting expedition. My father and both of my grandfathers touched marks and introduced themselves verbally using their full formal titles before stepping to the side and taking the seats which their servants placed for them.

Finally my grandmothers stepped together and joined their palms as they verbally introduced themselves giving their full formal titles. My mother's mother introduced her followed by my aunt Melanie. This introduction was the first time my father had heard my mother's first name: T'rese. My father's mother, in turn introduced her daughter, my aunt T'solde, and herself.

As the other women waited, Melanie stepped to the side and drew a circle. Once complete, she sat outside the circle. My grandmothers, mother, and Aunt T'solde stepped into the circle and completed the casting.

Magic is a rarity in our society. In order for a woman to possess active magic, to be able to harness and grow its power, she must have three characteristics. First, she must have a magic user in her direct maternal lineage. Her mother, grandmother, or farther back must have been a magic user. It is not enough to have a sister or aunt who was a magic user. Second, she must have a magic practitioner in her paternal lineage. Again, his mother, grandmother or farther back must have had magic. And third, she must be her father's first female issue. Any prior female issue, legitimate or illegitimate, magic user or non-magic user will cause the child to be a carrier of the magical gene but not a magic practitioner.

So my aunt Melanie could not cast although she carries a strong magical tradition and could pass it on to her daughters. No man could cast either although my father passed his magic on to me and my brother, D'nnie can pass his magic on to his first daughter. Likewise, my sisters-while not active magic practitioners-can pass their magic on to their daughters depending on their respective husband's lineage. Because magic was initially a characteristic only of nobility, it is still concentrated chiefly among our ranks. Some believe that a free- woman of no rank and certainly a mark-bound servant can not be a magic practitioner.

I once asked Melanie as she conducted my lesson how it felt to not be able to perform the simplest spell in spite of knowing how to do it all and the look of pain and sadness on her face made me, even the impertinent child I was, swear regret for such a question.

But really, my brother, my sisters, Melanie teaching me magic? That again comes later in this tale. And it will because we must get back to D'ni and why I'm waiting, listening to those too loud steps on the stair.

As my father, grandfathers, and Melanie watched the four women in the circle began a joint spell to demonstrate the power and delicacy of their magic. Taking turns they conjured water from air, fountains of swans floating in the grass before floating to the skies. They brought rains from heaven and stopped it over their heads, caused grapes and berries to sprout from beneath their seats. My grandmother conjured the illusion of a herd of elephants and my mother brought her familiar, Prr, into the circle to be petted by each of the others. Lights filled the sky, illuminating the gathering dusk enough to allow work on the feast to continue. T'solde caused music to begin to roll from the trees and servants danced as they worked.

While the rest of the gathering met, danced, ate, and eventually slept, the women remained in the circle creating greater and greater magic.

My father bowed down before my grandfather, Lord Moster, promising that the first daughter born him by my mother would be a powerful magician. He swore on his honor and the drawing of his breath that there was no chance that he had another. My grandfather, Lord Maclay, added his own vow to strengthen his son's.

At daybreak, a thousand doves rose from the lines of the circle and flew over the clearing before dispersing.

My grandmothers broke the circle and took my mother by the hand. My father's sister and Melanie each placing her right hand on my mother's shoulder blades. They crossed the clearing to where my father waited. My mother's mother took my father's hands, my father's mother my mother's hands and they placed their marks palm to palm as they introduced my parents.

My parents were joined eight moons later, the original date postponed following my grandfather's sudden departure from this world and my father's ascension to Lord of the estate. The magic performed at the joining ceremony made that at my parents's second meeting look like the work of a toddler. In all, the wedding boasted eight active magic practitioners and the ensuing celebration lasted seven days. My father, his marks freshly augmented with his ascension to Lord of the estate accepted his wedding marks with nothing but smiles and my mother could be seen to cry tears of joy as the Maclay marks were intertwined with her own. Their mark-bound servants accompanied them to the tent to accept their own elevated-fifth level-marks.

My brother, D'nnie, was born ten and a half moons after the wedding celebration. His birth was no disappointment given that my parents knew they could and would have more children. Within a twelve-month, my mother was pregnant again. This time, however, she had more pain, more discomfort, and even the greatest healers in the land could not help her. At eight moons, she struggled many hours to birth me. Her energy was only enough that she held me once and kissed my forehead and right hand before leaving this world forever.

My father bellowed like a wounded and tortured animal. Then he walked into the room and took me from my mother's grasp. He leaned over to kiss her on the lips and whispered to her. Then he looked in my eyes and promised me every happiness he had felt since the moment he had first seen my mother.

I can only begin, now sitting in this chair in the darkness, to start to understand the gravity of my father's pain in that moment. To love so deeply, so purely, so completely and have that taken from you so quickly…I don't know how he bore it all these years, nor how I will if that is the will of The Creator.

I've never known if my father and Melanie were brought together by politics or grief. Did they love each other? Do they? Is it the love of my mother which binds them together even now? Their wedding was rushed and private, my father taking on no greater marks although Melanie took on the Maclay ones as well as her fourth finger. I've never felt jealousy from her although she'll never take on that fifth mark. Even if I'd never ascended to my Ladyship, it would go to Donnie's wife.

The twins were born 18 moons after me-Anne so much like Melanie and Faith so much like father.

And D'ni?

I've never asked her because she would know no better than I how she came to be here. I've asked Melanie and D'Shel the story over and over. Each time, I've varied questions slightly, wanting to understand the shadings of the tale. Although it is not such a tale as mine, I suspect it is highly important. How could it not be?

I was two months old, tended by one of the servants. She was mark- bound to the house, having been formerly bound to my grandmother. While she still retained her five marks and all the rights of them, she was no longer my grandmother's to command with my grandmother gone. In attempting to decide who was the most appropriate caretaker for me, my father and T'solde had settled on D'rs. We were in the kitchen, where apparently I enjoyed the heat of the ovens and the noise of the many cooks. There was a knock at the back door and D'rs answered it, allowing in a woman, dressed in rags but clean and respectful. The woman dropped to her knees and addressed D'rs appropriately, begging for an audience with the Lord of the estate.

Taking pity on the poor soul, D'rs allowed her into the kitchen and quickly had someone bring her stew and bread. The woman accepted them and ate hungrily. When she thanked D'rs she explained that her baby had not had much to eat in the last few days and leaned back to show her rounded belly. D'rs fed her again and allowed her to tidy up before leading D'Shel into my father's study.

The woman bowed to my father and awaited his attention which he quickly and compassionately gave. Then she very honestly explained her situation. She claimed to be from The Estate of Roses, to the far North, was with child, as D'rs had seen, and wanted only safety and the best possible placement for her daughter (for she was sure to have a daughter she vowed). She had heard of my father's unending love for my mother and for his baby (this being me). Tears leaked from her eyes as she explained that she had milk for a baby but no baby to nurse and could nourish me.

Without taking details from her but accepting her honesty and desperation, my father agreed to take the two souls into his household. D'Shel accepted her marks that very night although both she and my father swear he did not take his marks-rights, then or ever.

It was of course understood that if born a girl, the child would be mine. When my D'ni was born she was placed at D'Shel's other breast and into my crib.

Part 2
Lessons

I can never remember a time when Dani wasn't with me. She and I and Donnie and later the three of us and Faith and Anne. We two rolled and played in my rooms before we could crawl, crawled when we could, and walked within days of each other: me late for my months and she early. When they were born Anne and Faith were placed in my rooms, on my rugs and the four of us happily slept, ate, and grew together. Even later with Donnie in his rooms, Dani and I in mine, and Anne and Faith in theirs, it seemed the five of us were constantly together.

As a child, I could detect no difference in my father's treatment or love for any of us. I don't even think I understood for many years our various relationships. And while Melanie was only mother to the twins, she cared for, loved, and instructed all of us. I certainly didn't notice that my clothes were finer, more ornate than the other children's' nor that Dani's were the least ornate. We five toddled through the manor terrorizing servants, breaking crystals left within our reach, and pulling on the dogs' and cats' tails with wild abandon. It never occurred to us that someone had to clean up in our wake and I'm not entirely sure that Anne understands this truth now.

The kitchens were a haven for us. We ran in and through them playing hiding games from each other or in escaping Melanie, D'Shel, D'rs, or a host of other guardians and would-be guardians. The cooks were always a soft touch for a drink of sweet goat milk, a hot bun, or a nibble of sausage and they found Dani so charming that we would set her up to go in the kitchen as we hid beneath the table before she understood the words we trained her to say. Her bright red-hair, such contrast to our blondes and brown, brought her renown and adoration in the house. Occasionally I heard mutterings of a Northern land and mystery.

Donnie was oldest and a boy and my father would take him for long rides in the forest teaching him hunting and tracking. And none of our lessons had begun formally yet. Yet, it seemed that every action was a sort of lesson. As we walked we began to understand who was who in the house and how to detect a person's rank by observing others behavior toward him. We saw D'rs, Melanie, and my father deal with service people, vendors, and other land-holders. Even Melanie's girl, D'elam, showed us how to interact with the other mark-bound servants. She after all had four marks, second only to father's man and D'rs.

Donnie's lessons began and a tutor came from town every day on his horse and met with the young boy in Donnie's rooms. The rest of us saw less of him from then on but after his lessons he always came to play with us.

Before my own lessons started, my father came to my rooms one day. Dani and I were playing a dress-up game and when my father came in he stopped in the doorway and watched us. Dani spotted him first and ran to him. He picked her up and swung her in the air before hiding her behind his back. "Tara, where did Dani go?"

"She's behind your back," I shouted as I jumped up and down on my feet, waiting for my turn to be swung into his arms.

He smiled and turned a complete circle, exposing a giggling redheaded child to my view but not finding her himself. "I didn't see her," he insisted.

"Daddy," I yelled pulling on his shirt, "you're holding her behind your back. You will have to set her down to see her again."

"Dani!" he yelled. "Where are you?"

Everyone said that I had a wonderful pout and I decided to put it to great use. "Daddy. Please give her back to me. She's mine and I can't live without her." I stuck out my lip and sat down on the floor pretending to cry. At six I couldn't have imagined the truth of either of those statements.

My father swung Dani back over his head and set her in front of me. "Well, then Miss Tara Maclay, daughter of T'rese Maclay, I can no more deny you that which you love than I could myself. Here is your Dani."

What had begun as a game with my father had turned into an emotional event for me. I reached up to grasp Dani and pull her to me, running my small hands through her hair and whispering to her that she could never leave me. She turned toward me and embraced me back vowing that she would never even think of it.

Comforted I jumped to my feet and took my father's hands in my own. He repeated his actions, swinging me in the air and hiding me behind his back. Dani pleaded for my return and he finally did so but without quite the ceremony.

Then he leaned on the doorframe and smiled his smile. "I have a present for you my daughter, in honor of your lessons beginning next week."

I jumped up and down clapping my hands before extending them and closing my eyes. "I want it. I want it," I chanted.

"Come then." He picked me up in one arm and Dani in the other and carried us through the castle.

"Lord Maclay," Melanie interrupted our journey, "I can not find your youngest child anywhere."

My father laughed. "She's probably in a tree again. If I see her, I'll shoot her down and send the pieces home."

Melanie returned my father's infectious laughter. "Please catch her as she falls then. She is supposed to be napping with Anne."

My father didn't break stride in carrying us out through the kitchen, snagging three sweet buns on our way and passing one to each of us. The servants bowing down to him returned to their duties as soon as we were out of the room.

My father was a wonderful tease and he decided to start as we walked. "I said to myself, 'self. What should I get my oldest daughter? Would she like a ship?'"

I interrupted excitedly. "There is no water here. I would have no place to sail." Besides Donnie, myself, and the twins, I don't think anyone else would have been impertinent or stupid enough to interrupt my father, even if he was just teasing. But I had no idea of this. Many years later, I remember that Dani never once interrupted him and wonder how she knew so early this boundary.

My father just continued. "Then I said to myself, 'what about a dragon? They are quite plentiful this time of year and I could get a very good deal on one in the next village.'" Dani and I laughed at the mental image of my father bringing a dragon home on a leash like a new hunting dog. "Or a flying machine so she could traverse the lands in moments?"

All laughing, we arrived at the corral. I could feel Dani's trembling as she reached her hand behind my father's back and took mine. In the corral stood two ponies, each saddled with leather bearing the Maclay family crest. My father set us on the top rail and climbed over into the corral, bringing the horses close to allow us to pet their noses. "What are their names?" I wanted to know.

He looked genuinely curious about this question. "I didn't ask them. Blasted." He leaned over and mock-whispered in the horses' ears, allowing us to hear this very question. Then he put his ear near their mouths and laughed. "They said they have no names yet and you should give them names."

I leaned over and whispered into Dani's ear for a conference on the names of the horses. She was either too scared of them or otherwise too reticent and insisted that I name both horses. I looked a long time at my companion and considered many names-Beauty, Baby Girl, Love-but couldn't think of saying those to my horse. Finally I announced my choice. "This one is Dream and this one is Hope."

The ponies whinnied and my father declared that to be their approval. "Are you ready?"

I nodded and Dani did too but I could tell she was very afraid. "Maybe we could ride together this time?"

He glanced at Dani and nodded his approval of the idea. Then he placed us on the horse, me behind and Dani in front of the pommel and wrapped my hands around her small waist. He handed me the reins and put a hand on the pony's bridle. "Hold on," he instructed as he began to lead us about the corral, leaving the second horse standing at the fence.

Dani trembled in my arms and I attempted to comfort her. I remembered once we had snuck off during a celebration for Donnie and she was convinced that one of the ponies had tried to bite her arm off. I argued with her that he just wanted some of the cake crumbs on her shoulder but she would have none of that explanation-still won't. I leaned forward in the saddle to press my body against hers and placed my mouth near her ear to begin whispering to her. I don't know what came over me but I began to chant a melody that I'd never heard. I could imagine colors coming from my mouth and filling her body with relaxation and it seemed to be working. I noticed my father looking at me curiously and then nodding but he said nothing. I didn't have any understanding of the meaning of my song. All I knew was that this, her, us, was what should be. That we should always be together, the two of us and that nothing could separate us and that I wanted most in the world for her to be happy with me. I wanted her to be mine forever.

As I was melting into a fantasy of my Dani, we suddenly all jerked our heads up as we heard a shout from the side of the corral. Faith leapt down from her perch on a low tree branch and ran for the fence, quickly scaling it and jumping onto the other pony's back. She grabbed the reins and gave a kick and the pony trotted around the circuit as Faith whooped and hollered. My father stood and watched dumbfounded as his youngest child went around the corral like she had been born on that horse.

I felt Dani's body tense and I suddenly picked up an impression from her mind. I don't know any better way to describe it. I could feel her fear. She was afraid to be on the horse but more than that, she was afraid that Faith and I would now ride without her, leaving her behind. I leaned forward and attempted to reassure her. "She's just my baby sister. You are my girl."

My father's attention was on our dark-haired hellion and Dani leaned slightly to the side and placed a soft kiss on my cheek. I still remember coherent thoughts at the time leaving me completely to be replaced by wishes that she would do nothing but that for the rest of time.

Laughing my father shouted across the corral. "You are supposed to be napping with Anne."

Faith rode alongside the fence and mounted the top rail without stopping the pony before shouting back. "Anne needs her beauty sleep. I don't." She was up the nearest tree and out of sight before any of us could answer.

"I don't know whether to be proud as hell at her or appalled at the way she runs free." My father shook his head and slapped his knee before telling us that it was getting late and we needed to wash up for dinner.

I don't want to give the impression that Dani never learned to ride. She wasn't like Faith but no one has ever been like Faith. Within months of starting, and father had to get Faith her pony or Dani would never have had one to ride, she could outride all us children and most of the adults. By the time I had twelve summers, only father's best hunters, the very men who had been with him when he met my mother, could equal her at riding or tracking.

Dani was a perfectly adequate rider once she got over her initial reluctance. We rode virtually every day following lessons and agreed that it was a good chance for me to rest my brain. Sometimes I led and sometimes she did and sometimes we just allowed the horses to wander. Most frequently we rode for a while, then stopped as Dani climbed from her horse to mine leaving Hope to graze as we rode together into the waning sun. I don't think she was scared any longer but we both craved the closeness of our rides and wouldn't be without them.

My lessons began the week after father gave me the horses. A tutor came from town every day on a horse, usually greeted first by Faith in bare feet, and met me in my rooms. Sometimes Dani was with me during the lessons, resting on her pad or straightening the room and sometimes she was not. I didn't know where she was and didn't think to ask. It was, I guess, an example of my self-absorption that I didn't acknowledge that she had any existence apart from me. While I sat in attention at my desks as the tutor repeated and repeated the lessons, Dani was in the room or elsewhere and I didn't give any conscious thought to her whereabouts.

One day, my tutor and I left for a walk around the grounds to take in the beautiful spring weather. We were working on Latin verbs and I felt that their staleness was particularly good for a long walk. I came back to my rooms quite tired from so much intense thought. Once I'd bid the tutor from my outer room, I wandered into my bed chamber. There, to my surprise, stood a large four-poster bed. Until this time, Dani and I had slept on a small mattress on the floor. Children flop about quite violently and it was tradition in our household to use mattresses such as this to avoid injuries in the night. Rather than replacing the bed, I found my mattress folded in half and still at the foot of the bed. After dinner, I returned to my rooms and prepared for sleeping. Dani set my hair, helped me into my nightgown, and kissed my cheek before lying down on the mat.

"Dani," I said, "what are you doing?"

"Going to bed, Miss," she answered. "As should you." She waved her small hand at my new bed which looked the size of the ocean and just as lonely to me.

"But I can't sleep up here alone," I protested.

Dani stood up and led me by my hands to the bed. She helped me under the covers and then promised that she would stay with me until I was asleep. She was a terrible singer but what she made up for in tone, she had in determination. She began singing and I was soon asleep. I woke in the morning to find myself alone in the bed. I cast my hand about to find the bed cold except for the spot where I slept. Dani was not in the room but when I climbed down, I felt the floor pad and found it warm from her tiny body.

I sat on the bed trying to understand what I was missing. It was as if many people were in collaboration on a set of rules that I had yet to comprehend.

Not much later, perhaps a few weeks, I was studying in my room and Dani was brushing my clothes. I was reciting (Latin verbs again). "Amo, amas, amat, amatis, amamus, amant. Amo, amas, amat, amatis, amamus, amant." I closed my eyes and continued repeating the declination. When I opened them I glanced down to see Dani kneeling at my side. She was facing the same direction as me with her eyes cast toward the floor. I laughed at first thinking that she was having a joke on me.

"Ok, Dani, what are you doing?" She didn't answer and I repeated her name. Still no answer. Finally, I tapped her on the shoulder repeating her name.

Dani sat up and addressed me. "Miss Tara? I believe you have the verbs out of order. It should be Amo, amas, amat, amamus, amatis, amant." I still felt befuddled about this new and very strange kneeling behavior not to mention that she had now called me "Miss" twice. I shook my head and opened my Latin grammar. She was right, of course. I thanked her and then asked her to sit with me.

We moved to the bed where she sat on the edge and did not make good eye contact. "Please look at me, Dani." She did exactly as I asked. "What is going on? Why were you kneeling?"

She squinched her eyebrow down in a way that made her look even younger than her seven years. "I have lessons too, Miss Tara."

I still didn't quite understand her. "You have lessons with who? Is that why you're not here for my lessons? I thought you wanted to learn with me. Where have you been?"

"I see D'elam every day," Dani explained as if she thought I should know this already.

"D'elam? Why D'elam?" My face must have been a picture of puzzlement.

"Perhaps you should speak to Miss Melanie?" Dani looked away and I saw a moment of pure pain and embarrassment in her eyes.

It was a look I never wanted to see again and I couldn't help but lean over and press my lips to her cheek. "You're my Dani," I whispered as I let my fingertips fall through her beautiful hair.

"I know," she said and there was something in her tone that I couldn't identify.

After dinner, I went to Melanie's rooms. D'elam met me and allowed me inside. Melanie welcomed me and gave me a kiss on each cheek before inviting me to sit at her table. D'elam brought us each a cup of tea and I thought about the fact that no one ever seemed to ask how I liked my tea, nor Melanie for that matter, yet it always seemed completely perfect. I didn't know how to start so I just blurted out what came to my mind. "Dani has been very weird lately."

Melanie took a long sip of tea and seemed to study me intently. "Weird how?"

"Well when I got the bed, she was strange, calling me 'Miss' and not getting into bed with me and today she kneeled, actually kneeled down to tell me something." I didn't say that Dani knew the verb declination correctly while I did not.

Melanie nodded her head. "That's good. Her lessons are progressing nicely then. I shall have to let D'elam know." She took a breath and muttered that D'elam would correct her about the kneeling though.

"What lessons? What is progressing?" I shook my head trying to understand if everyone in the house had suddenly gone mad or something.

"How old are you, Miss Tara?"

"What?" I shuddered at the strangeness of the question. "I…" I drew myself up to my full seated height. "I have nearly eight summers."

Melanie nodded again and set down her tea cup. She leaned across and took my hands. "Miss Tara, each of us has a role in life. Your role is to be Lady of this estate or of another estate if you choose to marry so. Your destiny was created many years ago."

I had heard my parents' legend many times. "I've heard the legend."

"It could be very soon, as soon as four or five summers that you will be ready to take your marks, Miss Tara."

I nodded.

"When you are ready to take them, Dani will need to be ready too." Melanie's words didn't make any sense to me.

"Dani's marks?" I shook my head. "What marks are you talking about? I thought only we," I waved my hand between Melanie and myself, "took marks."

Melanie pursed her lips. Just at that instant Anne came bounding through the door followed by Faith. "She took my doll!" the blonde wailed.

D'elam quickly corralled both girls and admonished them before sending them with one of the other servants to have their baths. Then she returned to our room and waited patiently.

"D'elam, do you mind?" Melanie asked.

"Not at all, Miss." D'elam approached the table and stood with her right side closer to the edge. Melanie reached out and gently pulled up on her cover and down on the waistband of her trousers. I tilted my eye to look at her hip. As I did, Melanie put her right hand on the table. The marks matched perfectly. Every aspect of Melanie's palm's decoration was mirrored on D'elam's hip. You could even see the four fingerprints, looking almost as if someone had grasped her too tightly and left a bruise.

I tilted my head as I looked between the two marks. I could feel a slight tingling. Like the static after a rainstorm or when you shuffle your feet on the rugs and then touch metal.

"Thank you, D'elam," Melanie said. D'elam adjusted her clothing, bowed slightly and retreated from the room.

"I don't understand," I told my aunt.

"D'elam is my mark-bonded servant." I stared at her. "She has been bonded to me since I took my marks."

"We have many servants in the house," I said. I still didn't understand what this had to do with Dani or her strange behavior.

"Yes, we have many servants but not all are mark-bonded to one of us." I took another sip of my tea trying to understand this explanation. Melanie took a deep breath. "Your mother could have done a better job with this explanation. We need…someone who is loyal to us. To each of us personally. Someone to serve and accompany us always. A servant of the family is just that. But you, a member of the nobility need someone to serve you personally. This is what it means to be mark- bonded."

"Dani?"

"Once your servant is mark-bonded to you, it would be literally impossible for her to leave you. To cross you. To fail you. Actually impossible." She leaned down her head, trying to see my eyes beneath the veil of my hair. "Dani is yours, Miss Tara."

I could feel hot tears rising to my eyes even though I wasn't sure why. "But sh-sh-she's my friend. I love her."

Melanie brushed my hair away from my eyes and behind my ears. "As you should. And you will take care of her, Miss Tara. Bonded to you she will have five marks. It is the greatest honor, the greatest protection we can offer those we hold." She took a breath. "You will always take care of her as you would your most valuable possession and in return, she will serve you with her every breath and movement."

I wanted to cry but I didn't want to do it here. The strange thought crossed my mind that Dani would hold me if I asked her. That she would have to. I thought of asking Melanie if this meant that Dani didn't love me as I loved her but I knew that wasn't the right question. Melanie leaned over and took my hands. "Miss Tara, you have your lessons and Dani has hers. You are very complimentary and will make a good pair."

She stood and the interview was very obviously over.

I bowed quickly and left her rooms, making my way back to my own, I have no idea how. By the time I was inside my bed chamber, hot tears were streaming down my face. I stumbled forward, seeing Dani sitting up on her mattress and opening her arms toward me. I fell into them, wiping my face on her nightgown and muttering to her. "It's not true. It can't be true." I kept repeating it over and over.

"It's ok, Miss Tara." Dani leaned against the bed, stroking my hair and face and back and whispering to me until I relaxed and fell asleep.

I woke in my own bed, alone and immediately felt both hurt and angry. I quelled those feelings and sat up. The instant I sat up, Dani came in. She bowed and walked over to the bed. "How are you feeling, Miss Tara?" she asked. "Would you like to wash before breakfast?"

I grabbed her hands and pulled her onto the bed with me. "Dani." She didn't look me in the eye so I said her name again, more forcefully. "Dani. Please look at me." She looked up and I noticed the red rims around her eyelids. I leaned forward and kissed each tender eyelid. "My girl, you've been crying." I hugged her tight. "It's ok, Dani. It just means we can't be parted."

She swallowed and nodded. "I know, Miss Tara. We'll never be parted." I hugged her again and after a few minutes she again prodded me to get up and moving for the day.

I was so naïve. I had no understanding. None at all. And…and I loved her so fiercely. I remember actually feeling that I would stop breathing without her. That if she were not in the world, I could not be either. And that depth of feeling was before we were mark-bonded. That was how I felt at eight summers. I look back on it now and am ashamed of myself. I had no understanding of her feelings. No hint of empathy for her.

I wonder if she has any empathy for me now.

And so our lessons continued. I met with my tutor six days in every seven-day, with one day off "for good behavior" as we all joked. Donnie's schedule mirrored mine. I studied Latin, French, Composition, Mathematics, Music, Art, and increasingly Politics. Donnie's subjects were similar to mine but with less emphasis on music and more on oration. It was entirely possible that the absence of oration was intentional in my subjects as I had somehow developed a stutter. I believe that my father and Melanie decided that it was a temporary situation which would resolve itself all on its own.

I believed, for good or aught, that my voice was hurt by the absence of Dani. Not that Dani had gone anywhere, but I continued to wake in the night and mourn her sleeping so far from me. At times I had nightmares that I had lost her and when I did, I always awoke crying. She must have trained herself to become a very light sleeper because my waking always brought her into the bed to hold and comfort me. I felt selfish but at the same time happy to have her close again.

I have to wonder, sitting here now, will the nightmares be anything like the real experience? How will I sleep tonight?

Where my lessons increased and intensified, Dani's did so even more quickly. She yearned for knowledge like no one I have ever encountered. She accompanied me to every lesson she could to soak up that learning in addition to increased meetings with D'elam and now D'rs also. Nearly every day one of the two of them came to her and held a lesson with her somewhere in the house. I knew no details on this because it wasn't the type of thing I was expected to have access to. While it was perfectly acceptable and even encouraged for Dani to accompany me to my lessons whenever possible, it was not considered appropriate for me to accompany her. Initially I had thought that I would have to sneak to allow Dani to continue my education along with me but knowing what would be expected of Dani, Melanie and my father encouraged her education.

Amazingly, in spite of her other lessons and in spite of missing some of mine, Dani exceeded both myself and Donnie at learning the material we had to cover. She could memorize a speech, spelling, or translation the first time she heard it and her ability to comprehend mathematics was truly spectacular. I would be sitting at a desk, doodling with my pencil while the tutor laid out a sum regarding the amount of seed required to plant a field, the expected yield depending on weather, and cost per gram of seed. Dani, would be doing other chores as he spoke and when he finally asked the cost for planting the estate's fields as well as the expected yield, she would have the answer. She wouldn't be so impertinent as to give that answer quicker than I or Donnie but I could always tell that she had already figured it before I could even set my pencil to the slate. Somehow in spite of our enforced distance, or perhaps because of it, we seemed to have even greater communication powers. I could often feel what Dani was feeling or thinking simply by looking at her and while she would not admit it, it was obvious that she had the same ability.

If she missed a lesson, she would absolutely insist that I report every thing that the tutor had said. She, of course, couldn't force me to do anything but she would pout and ask specific questions until I might just as well repeat everything I had heard that day. If she could corral Donnie, she made him give a report just as well, even if she had already heard the report from me and in case I had missed anything.

I will say this: having to repeat a lesson for someone turned out to be the best way for me to learn as well as helping my stutter. The tutor and his successor and his eventual successor gave father nothing but glowing reports of both my and Donnie's progress. I wonder what he would have said if he had been asked to give a report on Dani. I chuckle just thinking about it.

Anne and Faith began their studies a few years after Dani and me. I remember some discussion among the adults that perhaps Dani should be sent to the younger girls' lessons, as if Dani could not keep up with me. I remain convinced that even studying full-time with Donnie would not have been enough of a challenge for my brilliant girl.

The only failing Dani had was singing. Her voice was terrible. Awful. We all joked that when Dani started singing it was time to put the dogs out so that didn't have to contend with their howling along with hers. She took the teasing in stride and continued whistling as she accomplished her duties.

My father was an ardent believer in time outside for everyone. He required that everyone, from the lowest kitchen drudge to himself, spend some time out of doors having some exercise time every day. We children, often joined by countless visiting cousins from the neighboring estates, would complete our lessons and run screeching from the manor. If led by Faith, the afternoon would result in dares and eventual exhaustion. By Donnie, we all set out for a ride and usually returned with wild game for the kitchens. Anne was likely to organize the group into a game or dance of some sort. Myself, I found joy in riding.

No one questioned Dani and me riding together. It was well known that she would be mark-bound to me and seemed reasonable that we would ride together when we could. I loved nothing in the world better than the feeling of her small body against mine as we rode. I could feel our heartbeats and more often than not, they were perfectly synchronized.

I didn't think anything of it then-my need to possess her. I just knew that I needed to be close to her. As close as possible as much as possible. Her feelings about it? That wasn't something we were prepared or inclined to discuss. I can honestly admit, and I'm not proud of this, that I never considered what she wanted. I just thought it was what was so. That we should be together, that we would be together.

At times I even felt jealous of her. It was ridiculous. She was to be bound to me. There was nothing Faith could do about that but a part of me just felt so…One thing that they shared was a love for climbing trees. Anytime we couldn't find the pair of them, you could be sure they were up a tree somewhere. Of course Dani never stayed hidden long if she sensed I was looking for her but if Donnie or Anne needed her, they might as well lie down and cry as look for those scoundrels. Some times I worked to mask my need for her and helped the other two search. And at those times, it was truly amazing how long it would take to find them. More often than not, we would give up and walk back into the manor to find them eating an apple in the kitchen with innocent looks on their faces. Then Donnie would chase Faith through the house screaming that he would find her one day until D'elam or D'rs kicked us all out again.

One day the two of them were off climbing trees and Donnie was, as usual searching for them with a very surly manner. I had extra lessons that day and was studying under a tree when I heard a scream. I stood and ran as quickly as I could, my heart pounding until I found them near one of the largest of the oak trees. Dani sat on the ground, clutching her ankle with tears streaming down her face. Faith and Donnie quickly picked her up and carried inside as I ran ahead calling for the healer. The healer came and thanks to The Creator, Dani's ankle was just sprained, not broken. She was in bed for two days with D'rs tending to her through her argument that she needed to get up and help me. D'rs wanted Dani to stay with her but I insisted that she be in my rooms, finally being so bold as to demand it as my right as future Lady of the estate.

Near the end of the second day, there was a light knock on my door and I rushed to open it. Dani was asleep, finally after having stood up too soon and been in quite a large amount of pain. I opened the door to see a sheepish looking Faith standing there with her heavy coat wrapped around her. Given that I blamed Faith for hurting Dani, I was not inclined to allow her in but Dani called from the bed, "Who is it? Should I get up?"

I didn't want her to get up and called that it was just Faith. I leaned forward and whispered to Faith that if she hurt Dani again she would pay. She just smiled as she breezed around me.

"Hey, Red."

"Hi, Faith. Do you need anything?" Even bedridden, Dani wanted to take care of whatever Faith needed.

Faith shook her head with a smirk on her face and then opened her jacket revealing a small black puppy. Dani screamed in joy as Faith set it on the bed where it very promptly relieved itself. Dani didn't care, hugging the puppy and then Faith. Of course a moment later she saw the stain and hobbled about the room to clean it up. Faith quickly grabbed the bowl and rag from her and pushed her back onto the bed. "For Creator's sake, Dani. Sit and hug your puppy and let me do this."

"Mine? Really?" I don't know when I'd ever seen Dani so excited. I mean we were happy together so much of the time but this was…I felt jealous, left out. How did Faith know that Dani wanted a puppy? Where did she get it? Did Dani love her better? She held the puppy up. "Miss Tara. Look. Faith gave me a puppy. I can keep her right? Can I keep her? Please?" She slid from the bed and hopped over to me, still holding the puppy and kneeled at my feet. Faith shot me a look as I stood there stupefied. It occurred to me that she had never done this in front of anyone before and I thought that D'elam was supposed to disabuse her of the idea that it was necessary. I felt simultaneously embarrassed and proud that my girl was demonstrating how devoted she was to me in front of someone else.

Before I could speak, Faith came over and grabbed me by my forearms. "Just a minute, Dani," she said. She knew that she couldn't release my servant from her position but she could try to give her some comfort. My sister half-dragged me across the room. Once there she whispered to me. "Miss Tara Maclay. If you say no to her, you will break her heart." She glanced at the redhead still kneeling and petting the puppy. "And if you hurt her Anne and I and Donnie won't speak to you for twelve moons." She squeezed my forearms hard. "You understand that?"

I pulled my arms away from her angrily and went over to Dani. I kneeled down in front of her and ran my fingertip along her jawline. "Of course you can keep her." I leaned closer and whispered. "I want to always give you what you want, my baby."

She leaned forward and hugged me thanking me before realizing that her faux pas. Then she pulled away and hobbled over to thank Faith for the puppy. Faith gave her a hug and then said that Dani should get back into bed and she needed to be going. As she left she called out to me to remember what we had talked about it.

It seemed that my Dani had found a champion.

Not that she needed it much. I was sincere in my wish to make my girl happy. I was forever telling her stories, bringing her treats from the kitchen, giving her flowers or writing songs for her. I felt there was nothing I wouldn't do for her.

Not long after Faith gave Dani the puppy-Zhorro she had named her- Melanie informed us that it was time to start our magical lessons. Donnie was excused because his role in passing on the heritage was pretty much impossible to study for. In fact, it seemed that my father suddenly started taking Donnie for long walks in the woods. I assumed they were discussing something only Donnie needed to know, which of course, turned out to be true.

Melanie had waited until the twins had eight summers, feeling that before that was too early and not wanting to instruct me separately. Even though I would be only active magic user, it was still important for Faith and Anne to understand how to teach magic to their daughters, just as Melanie had learned from her mother although only my mother could perform magic.

When I asked if Dani could come, Melanie took it under advisement. She called me to her rooms the day before our lessons were to start. She told me that she and my father had decided that Dani would be allowed to attend the lessons. They felt that with Dani's memory – so they were aware of her mind – she could help me if I needed assistance in remembering what I had been taught. Faith and Anne had recently acquired the girls who would eventually become their mark-bonded servants and the girls were in training with D'elam but they were not to be invited to the lessons. I saw that as another proof of how special my Dani was.

So, my tenth summer I began my magical training with my aunt. We met every other day but skipped the rest-day. Our lessons usually took place in the clearing behind the manor which made Faith and Dani deliriously happy. Faith had said many times that even the most boring subject was palatable when she could hear the birds singing. Melanie teased her that she didn't know if she was raising a gentlewoman or a gamekeeper and Faith teased back that she knew which she would choose. Anne, on the other hand, had no doubt which she wanted to be. She was simply the most gentle, future gentlewoman I have ever seen. She would rather sit and do handiwork than play or ride and certainly anything getting dirty.

The magical lessons were, in a word, exhausting. They surpassed any subject I had encountered in my five years of serious study. There was no studying for them. I was to learn, to absorb the material and then enact it. Melanie could not demonstrate the magic for me although once a week or more T'solde traveled over to help in my instruction. T'solde, of course, could perform magic and it gave me a great appreciation in the difference I could feel when they cast a spell. From Melanie, I felt a sort of frustrated energy emitting from her but from T'solde, it was as if someone had opened a flood-gate. Each time I experienced her casting, I felt that her power was rushing through me. I asked Faith once if she felt that and Faith just shook her head. Apparently it was something you required my magic for. When we started, I could not do such a simple spell as lifting a feather.

But I worked hard. Over and over T'solde and Melanie drilled into me that these studies were as important to me as my others put together. By the time I had thirteen summers, I could float feathers and much more. Twice that year, I lifted Hope and Dream and held them for 6 heartbeats. I brought rain to the valley below our house once and had started being able to light candles and fires with no verbal incantation. The others were learning right along with me and were expected to attempt each spell regardless of the certain knowledge that they would never produce a single bit of magic. I felt sorry for my sisters that luck of birth order ensured my superiority but that feeling never lasted long when I looked at Dani. The thought of Faith or the very droll Anne with Dani was just…no.

One day a few years into my magical training Dani had to miss our lessons because she was studying with D'rs. One of my father's brother's wife's brother was being married and we would all be traveling to the wedding. I would be expected to perform only a small spell with T'solde's help. But all the servants were eagerly preparing for our journey to begin just two days hence.

I was exhausted at the end of the lesson and waved off Faith's encouragement to take a long ride with her. Rather, I decided to go back to my rooms for a rest. I knew that Dani would wake me just in time for dinner. I opened the door very quietly because I was so tired and let myself into my outer chamber where I slipped off my shoes. I stepped into the bedroom and stopped dead-still in the doorway.

We had been attending our magical lessons for a little over three years at this point. But…What I was seeing couldn't possibly be true.

Yet it was.

Dani sat on her mat on the floor. In front of her, floating in the air were: the dog's ball, two barrettes, a hair brush, a pencil, a candle (which kept lighting and unlighting itself), and my pillow. She was humming softly to herself a melody which was obviously keeping the items afloat. I stood there with my mouth dropping more and more open. She was doing it over and over. Without putting anything down she stood up and began to turn in a circle. On her first turn, her eyes were down on the floor so she did an entire turn and a half before she saw me standing in the doorway.

Immediately everything fell to the floor including Dani who dropped to her knees.

"Dani?" She didn't answer so I repeated her name. After a few seconds, I crossed the floor and tapped her lightly on her shaking shoulder. Realizing that she wasn't going to just jump up and talk to me I dropped onto the floor, sitting cross-legged in front of her. "Dani." I touched her chin and she looked at me. "I'm not upset with you." She let out the breath she was holding. "H-h-how long have you…" I waved my hands at all the things scattered around the floor.

"I didn't mean it," she protested.

"Dani. It's ok." I took her hands before she could jump up. "I just don't understand. I mean…You're doing magic."

"Please don't tell anyone," she pleaded.

"I'm not going to tell." I leaned forward and kissed her cheek. I'm not sure what possessed me to do it but I wanted to reassure her and it was the first thought that came into my head. She smiled at me and I had to concentrate to keep from feeling like I was going to fall over. "You know this shouldn't be possible right?"

She nodded.

"Do you know what this means?" When she didn't answer I summed up what we knew about magic. "Dani, your mother and father were both from magic families. They're probably noble." I felt completely excited at the discovery but Dani was very pragmatic.

"Miss Tara. My mother is a mark-bonded servant of this house. I am a servant of this house. We are not noble." Her tone brooked no disagreement from me.

I shook my head still trying to comprehend what I had seen. "How long have you been able to…"

She blushed. Actually blushed. I had never seen it before and it was adorable enough that I thought I would lose my train of thought about the magic. "From your first lesson, Miss Tara."

"But…in the lessons. You don't perform magic."

"I-I-I know. I um stop it? So you all won't see?" I continued looking at her and she continued. We had moved to sit on the edge of my bed by now and she had replaced the pillow and was absently straightening the bed covers. "I didn't know but then when you learned that feather floating? I did the incantation and it started to rise. So I reversed the incantation. You know, so it wouldn't?"

I had never tried to not do magic. "How-how did you know to reverse it?"

Dani pursed her lips. "I-I don't know. I just did."

I nodded. "Did you speak to D'Shel?"

Dani looked away and I had to touch her chin with my fingertips. "D'Shel said that I was being absurd and to forget all about it." She smiled at me. "But she was smiling when I told her."

For a short time we just sat there smiling at each other. I had known that Dani was special. One of a kind. My perfect compliment. I leaned forward whispering in her ear. "You are perfect. Do you know that?"

Dani looked at me for a moment. Then she cast her eyes down shyly and whispered back. "No, Miss Tara, you are perfect."

I felt as if someone had lit a thousand candles in my heart. I convinced her to nap with me in the bed and although she seemed tense at first, she quickly dropped to sleep in my arms. The room had grown darker when she woke me and told me that we needed to go to dinner.

Dani helped me dress and set my hair. Before we left the room, I took her hands in mine-so perfectly did they fit. "This will be our secret?"

"Yes, Miss Tara. If you please?"

And it was our secret. Something to keep between ourselves. Our magical education continued in the same fashion with the two of us taking instruction with Faith and Anne from Melanie and T'solde. My power and precision grew with each lesson as did Dani's-a fact only the two of us knew.

Part 4
The Gathering

The family wedding was the most visible and elegant event we children had ever attended and the farthest we would be traveling. The journey was a day and a half on horseback. Along the way we would join up with various aunts, uncles, cousins, and all the requisite servants and workers accompanying them so that by the time we reached the celebration, we would be over one hundred and fifty strong. From my father's estate alone, we brought thirty-one souls.

The day of departure dawned clear and warm but not too warm. When I awoke, Dani was already gone from my rooms – our rooms I thought of them. I dressed myself in traveling clothes which she had laid out for me and went to the dining room where I found my siblings, similarly attired, enjoying a quick meal. Just as we finished, D'elam came to tell us that it was time to go. Zhorro was staying at the house with the remaining house staff who had promised to spoil her with meats so much that she would not recognize Dani when we returned. We each bent down to pat her head and allow her to lick our faces.

Melanie's voice rang through the dining chamber. "Where are the children?" We all looked around and then took Faith's cue, dashing from the room and through the kitchen out into the courtyard. We emerged to spot a bustling yard of activity. Servants were putting the last items into wagons and tying on saddle bags. I spotted Dani tying a bag onto Hope and was about to call to her but my voice seemed to catch in my throat. She wore an outfit I had never seen before: brown leather pants, new riding boots, and a soft-looking white shirt. Her hair was pulled back from her face with a thin strap of blue-dyed leather, the contrast between it and her red hair making quite a statement. She was, in a word, breathtaking. I thought my heart, twelve summers young that it was, would stop in that instant. I stood there for what felt like the longest time but I'm sure it was only a second or two before Faith punched me in the arm and ran off toward her waiting horse.

Startled from my reverie I made my way over to Dani who had glanced up and smiled. "Your horse, Miss?"

I stood there for minute not knowing what to say and feeling my cheeks burning. "I missed you this morning," I finally choked out.

Dani's cheeks turned red too. "I-I was tending the…" She waved her hand around the courtyard. She extended her hand to help me onto my horse. As I took it and moved my foot toward the stirrup, I heard her whisper. "I missed you as well, Miss."

Once the assemblage was seated, my father moved to the head of the column and moved out, everyone else following. Because the journey was to be so long, a somewhat informal processional would be used. While mark-bound servants would of course be required to observe proper riding etiquette, the boundaries of position and movement within the column would be more relaxed than usual. We children, including Dani, were allowed a very informal version of riding etiquette. This gave us great latitude to move up and back through the ride and visit with each other and assorted adults in the group.

The taking of Donnie's marks was scheduled four months hence with the celebration a moon later and we all teased him rather mercilessly about his requirements the next time we made an expedition like this one. He spent a great deal of the journey riding at father's side and I spent quite a bit of time at Melanie's side and later T'solde's. Our parents and the other adults in our party let us know that a journey was no excuse for a break from our studies. And it seemed to me that they had taken it upon themselves to teach us more intensely than our normal tutors did. By noon I felt that my head was full and couldn't hold any more.

Dani seemed to glow under the load. She stayed near me most of the time but also went over to hear what Faith and Anne were learning and occasionally seemed to sneak off to confer with Donnie. Of course, she was always there the moment I wanted her. Shortly after our lunch break I rode next to Melanie. It was one of the few minutes when she was not drilling me on my magical studies and I was relaxing. My eyes wandered to Dani. "I didn't know Dani would have new clothes for our journey."

Melanie looked at me for a long moment. "Every member of this household reflects upon our estate, your father's Lordship, and your eventual Ladyship. Not the least of that reflection is your own servant. The way this estate treats, educates, and outfits our members and the way those members act can bring us shame or pride." She must have seen the stricken look on my face because she added, "I see nothing about Dani that should ever but bring our estate and you personally the greatest pride. She is to be dressed and treated so to make her the envy of every servant and free man or woman she encounters and to make you the envy of every noble woman."

I nodded my head. I had never really thought about Dani's position relative to those not in our family. When I thought about her role, it was generally limited to understanding that she was devoted to me as I was to her and that she would never leave me. It was only now that I was starting to understand how highly respected she would be, must be, outside our family. Paradoxically while she was mine to command, committed solely to me (or would be once we had taken our marks a few years hence), a part of her - her reputation and image - belonged to the entire estate. "Yes, Miss Melanie," I answered after a few moments. "Thank you." I dropped back toward the middle of the column and Dani joined me within minutes.

"Are you having a good journey, Miss?"

I smiled at her and batted my eyelashes quite flirtatiously. "It could only be better if you were in my arms." She didn't answer verbally but instantly moved her horse close enough to mine to slide across and sit in front of me. She looped Hope's reins loosely around the pommel and leaned forward to whisper to Dream. Then she sat back into my arms, letting her body relax against mine. I didn't know how long she had been awake that morning packing but I could feel the exhaustion in her body. I leaned forward and nuzzled her warm neck .She smelled of sweat and work and new leather and sweetness and I gently pressed a kiss against the silky fuzz of her skin. "You are welcome to sleep for a while, my girl."

She seemed to consider protesting for a minute but reconsidered. "You'll wake me if you need anything, Miss?"

"I promise." She made me reiterate my promise and then promptly became limp in my arms. We rode like that for a few hours until the caravan stopped for dinner. Her small body rested against mine, taking all reasonably coherent thought from my mind. I could hear her faint breath, feel and see her pulse beat in her neck and it was all I could do to keep from planting kiss after kiss on that softly pulsing vein. Only my wish to not wake her when she obviously needed the rest kept me from it. Even so, I leaned forward over and over, nuzzling into her skin, kissing her neck or the spot behind her ear, whispering my devotion to her. My lessons were apparently over for the afternoon because neither Melanie nor T'Solde approached me. Or perhaps they realized how badly Dani needed the rest.

The moment I halted Dream, Dani was awake and active. She dismounted and as she reached the ground bowed slightly. "Thank you, Miss, for allowing me that rest." I put my hand in hers and swung from the saddle a little stiffly.

I placed my reins into her hand and brushed my fingertips along her hand. "I enjoyed it just as much as you," I assured her.

She blushed slightly and then led our horses over to the stablemen. She returned after a few minutes to our spot. One of the servants had spread a blanket on the ground and Faith, Annie, Donnie, and I had already taken our seats. I passed Dani her plate, already piled high with meats, cheese, and fruit and a decanter of wine and she thanked me as well as the others. "I wonder what it will be like," Faith mused.

Anne was, as usual, in a fantasy world. "Beautiful dresses and flowers. Everyone dancing to each song from the band." Realizing that we were all laughing at her she poked Faith and I. "Maybe we'll meet our future husbands there."

Faith made a snorting noise through her nose. "Oh yeah. That would be just great." She looked at us all with the usual mischief on her face. "Maybe Donnie here wants to meet his wife. After all he can't really have any fun until he contributes legitimate a magic user to the family."

We all laughed somewhat uncomfortably. Being raised on an estate, we knew all about "where babies come from." We'd seen horses, cows, dogs, and every other conceivable animal mating for as long as we'd walked into the dooryard. But that didn't mean that we were comfortable thinking about Donnie doing that. Although he was over 14 summers old, I still thought of him as my big little brother. The fact that he would soon be taking his marks, fourth level marks, meant that his opportunities would be nearly unlimited and he would have to exercise no small amount of self-restraint. If he were to later marry into a magic family, a near certainty with our pedigree, and produce a non- active magic using daughter, it would bring disgrace to the Maclay family name. We children had heard tales of families shamed by a son's behavior, setting out to find the child who had "stolen" their magic as they saw it. Reports of what those families did if they found the child were…gruesome.

Always one to return any conversation to dancing, Anne continued her fantasies. "I have four ball gowns, one for each night and hope to dance with every noble man at this event."

"That's my fantasy too," Faith said drolly.

We were laughing but became serious when father approached the blanket. Dani jumped up and bowed while the rest of us just said "Hello, Father."

He took a seat and invited Dani to sit back down, in fact playfully tackling her into his lap. "We have decided that we covered enough ground today and are going to break here for the night." He turned to Donnie. "How does that sound to you, son?"

I respected this approach. While father and his brothers had already made the decision, they wanted to give the impression that Donnie was being consulted. I had noticed father doing this more and more with Donnie and even with me in the last year or so. It seemed that those lessons we had taken throughout the day were not completed yet. Donnie stood and with a very adult air asked father to step off with him so that they could discuss it. I knew that he wouldn't have any objections but I'm sure that he wanted to understand the reasons for the decision.

Dani hastily stood up and took our plates. "I should go prepare your tent, Miss Tara."

I sat and watched her movement across the grass. I had never really seen her interact with the other servants and I saw how they all greeted her. They were friendly and respectful in their interactions with her and I noted how she knew every person, enjoying the opportunity to visit with him or her as she passed or performed her duties. When I took my marks and then she did, she would become the ranking servant, excepting D'rs and D'rek, father's man, of the estate. She would be required to know everything there was to know about running our household and it seemed that she was well on the way.

One thing for which I was grateful: we would be sharing a small tent tonight. Unless she was going to be so foolish as to insist on sleeping outside, we would be in close quarters and I was sure to get to hold her all night long. Faith was telling us a long story, which turned out to be an elaborate pun, about the day she tracked a large cat for hours when Dani returned. She waited off the blanket and then excused herself. "Miss Tara, I have your tent and bath ready if you would like to come."

"Thank you, Dani." We all stood up and stepped from the blanket which Dani bent and began to fold before I could even think of it.

"Hey, Red. I'm going sleep under the stars. Care to join me?"

Dani looked from Faith to me and then shook her head. "Thank you, Miss Faith. I will stay with Miss Tara."

Faith shrugged. "Suit yourself."

Anne looked at her sister. "Mother brought a very nice tent and she wants to sleep on the ground like an animal. I have no understanding of this creature." We all laughed and teased Faith about being a creature.

We reached our tent and Dani dropped to her knees and began to unlace my riding boots before pulling back the flap. I stepped inside and then dropped down, waiting for her to remove her boots.

"W-w-would you rather sleep outside?" I asked nervously.

Dani shook her head. "My place is with you, Miss Tara." She grasped the hem of my shift. "Now let's get you washed and ready for bed."

As she began to undress me I leaned forward, whispering in her ear. "I can make it worth your while to sleep in the tent."

Dani dropped to her knees again as she peeled my riding britches down my legs. She looked up at me with a smile. "How is that, Miss Tara?"

I ran my fingertip along her forehead, brushing her bangs away from her eyes. "I've been working on my tickling techniques."

Dani reached for the sponge and warm water and began to softly wash me. "Oh, is that so, Miss Tara?" The water was the perfect temperature and I relaxed as she slowly wet my skin before soaping up the sponge. Dani worked methodically but softly to wash and rinse me, drying each section of my body as she completed it. When she had finished my upper body, she pulled my nightgown over my head and arms but tied it up so that she could wash my legs and feet. When she finished she brushed my hair out thoroughly and placed the softest kiss on my shoulder. "All done, Miss Tara." She patted the blankets.

I smiled at her and took the sponge from her hand. "Let me." She blushed and looked away. I don't know if everyone felt this way but I always felt that any little act I could do to return her kindness was one I wanted to take. I washed her, using the same slow and soft technique she had employed and in a few minutes we were done. She went to dump out the dirty water and returned to find me in the sleeping blankets she had laid out earlier. I patted the spot next to me and she blushed again, a habit I was starting to find adorably irresistible. Then she lay down on her stomach and I began to run my fingertips very lightly over her back and neck as she giggled and squirmed. When she could take no more, we traded and she used the same technique on me. Eventually we giggled so much that someone walking by the tent cleared their throat loudly at us and we pushed our mouths into our pillows as we laughed even harder. Then we moved onto our sides and snuggled together all night.

She was gone from the tent when I woke up. I had just changed into my riding britches and was reaching my hand outside the tent for my boots when she placed them into my searching hand. "Thank you, Dani."

She bowed with a smile. "You're welcome, Miss Tara." I noticed that she had polished both our boots and brushed our britches so that we looked quite fine to begin the second and final day of our journey. She handed me a small plate with bread and fruit and a cup and told me that we were moving out very soon and that she had just been coming back to wake me.

"Thank you. Have you eaten?"

She assured me that she had and pointed out a blanket on the ground on which I could eat while she packed up the tent. By the time I had finished the meal, she had our horses loaded and ready to go. She helped me up into the saddle and then took her place beside me. I wanted to tell her how much I appreciated her help. How invaluable she was to me. But all I could think to say was, "Thank you for spending the night with me.

She tilted her head and me and was about to speak but Faith rode up at that moment. "Uncle is taking a hunting party. Do you want to go?"

Dani and I decided to go and ended up joining a rather large group which included Donnie, Faith, we two, and seven others. Father did not come but he sent Derek with the group. We had quite an enjoyable morning with each person bringing back at least two quail or pheasant. Dani had done particularly well, bringing home five birds. Her skill at hunting was very interesting to watch. On one hand, she wasn't as strong as we other children. But she had an uncanny ability to aim. It was as if she had a hidden abacus performing calculations on distance, trajectory, wind resistance, and twenty other factors in pulling back and releasing the bow string.

We rejoined the party just before high sun and the group stopped. Immediately the servants set to preparing the birds for our mid-day meal and the rest of us began to change our clothes. While our riding clothes were appropriate for our journey, we would be arriving in less than an hour and it was our responsibility to make the strongest possible impression. Dani helped me into my presentation outfit, washed my face and hands, set my hair, got herself ready, and eventually helped to get Anne ready since D'elam had Melanie, Anne, and Faith all to manage. We ate carefully with cloths across our clothes to keep them from becoming soiled.

I found myself hardly able to eat for looking at Donnie's presentation. He wore the full colors of our house including a sword by his side and looked absolutely dashing and grown-up. I still thought of him as a child, like myself, but he was soon to be an adult with many responsibilities and rights. Of course, his education would not end at that time. I predicted it would simply intensify.

When we reformed, our assemblage looked very different from the one we had been just hours earlier. Organizing our presentation took a while as the three estates worked to form the correct hierarchy. I don't know that I could reproduce it even now. Suffice it to say that at the heads of the three columns were my father, my aunt T'solde and her husband-Lord Martin-and my cousin who was Lord of the third estate. Each of their mark-bonded servants rode a ½ length back from them. Melanie and therefore D'elam were directly behind my father and Donnie and myself were directly behind her with Faith and Anne behind us. Because neither Dani nor Donnie's future servant were bonded yet, it was determined that they would ride with Faith and Anne. While some saw this as a strange presentation, Dani's presence was seen as a mark of prestige for the family; having a servant who had been with her mistress since birth was something that only the very best and very richest of families could boast. Given Dani's position in the column, there was no way to exclude Donnie's man from the same hierarchal level.

So great was our family's pride in Dani that her gown very nearly matched mine. Where mine was covered with jewels, hers matched it in embroidery. In every other way it mirrored mine and I found myself staring at her until she moved behind me. From then on, my mind was filled, quite happily, with images of her thus attired. The thought briefly passed through my mind that I wondered if all ladies felt thus about their future bonded servants.

We arrived at our destination shortly after high-noon. The greeting from our hosts was appropriate in every respect. Once the Lord and Lady of the manor had greeted the heads of our columns, their servants helped us from our horses and led the horses away to be cared for. Of course, some of our servants went with to assist while others went toward the kitchen with our feast gifts and to help in preparing the meals. Dani was helped from her horse shortly after myself and we found ourselves standing very close together as formal greetings and introductions were made. I softly touched the back of her hand and whispered out of the side of my mouth. "You look absolutely beautiful, my girl."

"No where near as beautiful as you, Miss Tara," I heard her quiet reply. I glanced over and noted the pink of her cheeks, not sure whether it was the ride or something else causing it but sure of how it accented her eye color.

Finally it was my turn to be introduced and I felt Melanie's watchful eye on me but I managed each meeting appropriately and even avoided stuttering. Donnie did similarly well and each of us presented our future bound servants before the procession moved on to T'solde's children. Once the lengthy introductions were completed, we were led to our rooms.

Dani set to work immediately hanging my gowns and making us at home. My room was tasteful and ornate, befitting my position but reasonably far from the main halls to afford some privacy. Faith and Anne were a few doors down the hall with Donnie on the opposite side. I watched Dani as she unpacked our traveling wardrobe and considered asking if she wanted help but she would have taken it as an insult had I done so. Instead I had to content myself with writing in my journal and sneaking peeks at her as she bustled around the room. I began teasing her by playfully putting out my hand to grab at her as she passed close by and she joined in by making a game of it-seeing how closely she could come without being touched by my wandering fingers. She verily danced about the room, swerving this way and that to avoid my touch all the while making me crazy for the feel of her. A few times I actually got my grasp around her hip and pulled her into my lap where I tickled and kissed her as she laughed. I don't know if she let me catch her those times but she teased me terribly. "I will have to watch myself, Miss Tara, if this is how you wish to molest me."

I giggled at her words. "Oh Dani, I would never wish to impose my will or touch on you when you don't desire it."

She kissed the tip of my nose then she jumped up to continue her chores. That afternoon, seemed to be one of those times that I found myself unable to take my eyes from my girl. She glowed with every bit of excitement of the journey and her work. She looked amazing back in all her traveling clothes and every word she spoke seemed to be lifted by a thousand butterflies directly to my ears. A few times, I found myself in a bit of a daze as she repeated my name over and over again. Snapping out of it, I managed a weak joke each time.

The wedding itself was…elaborate and amazing. I had never seen so many members of the nobility together before. Each seemed to be waited on by servants who anticipated their every request before it was possible to voice it. The food served at every banquet was incomparable with the finest meats, rich sauces, fresh vegetables, and deserts of chocolate and cream. If I hadn't stopped her, I fear Dani would have never slept for trying and loving a hot drink named kaffee. I believe that Anne's wish to take a turn with every nobleman at the wedding was fulfilled thrice over and all of us made my father's Lordship proud with our dancing. We laughed playfully at Dani when Melanie came over to kindly request she refrain from singing.

My magic demonstration was, according to T'solde, exceedingly passable which I had learned to accept as high praise indeed.

During the days we were left much to our own devices and with countless cousins, we hunted and rode throughout the valley. Dani partook in every activity I choose from dancing to riding and I started to notice a pattern I had never noted before. Each time Dani was parted from me, to talk to Faith or Donnie, or retrieve a bird or for whatever reason, someone would ride up next to me or sidle up to me and begin a casual conversation. Very quickly he or she would turn the conversation toward Dani telling me that she was a very beautiful girl, that she had good bearing or presence, seemed attentive or any of a series of compliments on my girl. I was made to feel as if I had made a fine choice in selecting and training such a companion, and more so, that many others would like such a servant. I don't think that Dani had any idea that such conversations were going on or she would have been embarrassed to have been the topic of such discussion.

At night, we attended grand banquets and balls. This gathering was the first event we had been to with such a vast mix of families and individuals. As the evenings progressed, the adults seemed emboldened by wine and ale. We children faded into the chairs and windowsills surrounding the large room to watch their curious rituals. It seemed as if this event was an opportunity and pairs of dancers made their way from the room throughout the evening. At first it seemed only the most beautiful, most eligible, most charming of the noblemen had partners but eventually we children were left in an empty or nearly empty room attempting to comprehend everything we had seen with our adolescent minds and immature sensibilities.

"She never says no. She can't." We were breaking for dinner of our journey and Anne held court with the five of us, explaining some of what she had learned at the wedding.

"What do you mean she can't? Like she'll get in trouble?" I asked.

Donnie harrumphed. "She'll get in trouble? Did you see the size of the men compared to the women? I doubt he'd take no for an answer."

Faith reached across the blanket to hit Donnie on the arm. Hard. "You idiot. 'Doubt he'll take no for answer'? What you're talking about doesn't happen. It can't."

"Because he'd be punished?" Donnie suggested.

Anne looked disgusted with all of us for a moment. "Why am I the only one who ever pays attention about these things?" Dani didn't look up to argue the point of whether Anne was the only child who paid attention. Anne blew out a breath. "He can't force a woman because of the mark-binding."

I finally joined the conversation. "What do you mean, Anne? We saw plenty of couples leaving the banquets and balls."

Anne shook her head. "You are all such children." She looked completely disgusted with our innocence which I found ironic given that she was a year and a half younger than I and 3 years younger than Donnie. "The mark-bond carries magic in it. We all know that." She looked at all of us expectantly and we finally obediently nodded our heads. Of course we knew that.

"Well one piece of magic in the mark-bond is the power of mark- rights. Any man with higher or equal marks to a bound woman can share mark-rights with that woman."

"No way," I disagreed.

Anne nodded her head. "Why do you think that a woman's marks are where they are? On her right hip. Have you ever taken a look at them? They are placed as if the man is holding her with his marks. Look at the finger marks on D'elam's hip sometime."

Dani showed her naivety. "But that means that Lord Maclay could have…I don't believe that."

Donnie came to father's defense. "It doesn't mean that he has. It only means that he can."

We were all silent for a moment. "So she can't say no?" I wanted to know.

Anne looked around the circle again. "She wouldn't want to. I mean…The magic of the rites means that if he wants to she will."

Faith seemed completely disgusted and Dani hadn't said a word since the discussion had begun. "So she'll just go along…?"

"I'm sure it would be ok for her," Donnie attempted to assure his sister.

Anne looked like she was about to scream-quietly and in a very ladylike manner of course. "Sometimes I can't believe I'm related to you all. She will like it. She will love it. She will get as much pleasure from it as he will. That's the magic of the mark!"

It all still seemed very unbelievable to me. "So you're saying that once Donnie gets his marks he and D'elam could…" Donnie paled and I decided to tease further. "And that it would be pleasurable for both of them? And she'd have no choice even though she changed his dirty diapers as a baby." I reached over and poked him in the stomach.

"If you'll all excuse me," Dani said quietly as she stood up, gathered our dishes, and walked away.

"Thanks for bringing that up, Anne." I knew I had a sneer in my voice but I didn't really care. I got up and followed Dani to see if she was ok. The truth is that I didn't really think of Dani as a servant, as someone who would follow mark-bound magic. She was just…my Dani. And even though I wanted to blame Anne for talking about it, I knew I should have been more considerate of my precious girl.

Throughout the rest of the journey Dani seemed to be in a sour mood. Oh, she carried out her responsibilities and was respectful and helpful but she wasn't as playful as she had been before. She seemed too much in her head too much of the time. I attempted to get her to talk to me but she insisted she was fine, even going so far as saying that she was "Finey McFine" which made me laugh if not her. Even our arrival home to be greeted by Zhorro who jumped up and muddied Dani's pants, not that she cared in the least, didn't seem to lift my girl's spirits.

I tried everything I knew to lift her mood, bringing her gifts of flowers and treats for herself and Zhorro. I coaxed her to sleep in my bed and held her tightly while whispering sweet nothings to her. Finally, I went to Melanie to ask if she had any ideas. I explained about the conversation we had all had on our return and saw a flash of something cross my aunt's face. Then she assured me that D'elam would speak to Dani. A few days later it did seem that Dani was in a brighter mood and we rode and sang and joked as usual. By the end of the moon, I had quite forgotten her sadness and the castle began to prepare for Donnie's mark celebration.

I waited until I had 17 summers behind me before taking my marks. I could have taken them earlier, much earlier for I had started bleeding more than three summers previous, but I wanted to wait. My waiting, while unusual, was my choice. Occasionally a family would decide to postpone the taking of marks for timing or maturity but in this case the delay was entirely up to me. My father never approached me about the marks although Melanie did.

She came to my rooms a few months after I had become eligible. Dani offered Melanie tea which Melanie politely refused, then Dani bowed to her and left, carrying with her a few plates and cups from a snack we had been enjoying as we studied. She bid me to stay seated and pulled up a chair on her own.

"Miss Tara." She reached out and took my hand, gently stroking the back. "Your father, Lord Maclay, wishes to know when you will receive your marks."

I looked away for a moment. "I do not feel ready, Miss Melanie."

She nodded her head slightly. "Your education has progressed very well and very quickly. I hope you know how pleased your father and I are with your studies." She said this like a question, her voice rising on the last syllable.

"Yes, Miss." I smiled at her.

"And you know also that T'solde feels that your magical power is, if anything, higher than expected. Your focus and purity are excellent and your artistry training is an unexpected value."

I took a breath. "Yes, Miss Melanie. But I don't feel that this is the right time."

She looked like she was considering whether to speak or not. "If you are worried about Dani, D'elam tells me that she is not ready for her marks yet. She can follow when she becomes ready."

My words seemed to catch in my throat but I swallowed audibly. "No, Miss Melanie, she is not." I was no expert on such things but I wondered if her slimmer figure meant that her bleeding would not come so young as mine. While I had noticed the changes in my body, hers had not started these changes yet.

Again Melanie took my hand. "Dani is a wonderful and devoted girl. You will both bring pride to your family when you take your marks." When I didn't answer she let go of my hand and sat back in her chair. "I will tell Lord Maclay your decision. " We said goodbye and she left my rooms.

Dani was back a few minutes later with a bowl of water to wash my hair. I sat in the chair and she put the water on the table and began to work the lather in. "She came about your marks, Miss Tara?" I believe that only our closeness allowed her to ask such a question.

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. "I am not ready to take my marks, my girl."

"Yes, Miss Tara." We were silent for the rest of the hair wash and as she combed and set my hair.

As had now become tradition, when she had finished her work on my hair, she took my seat and allowed me to wash and brush her hair as she had done mine. The water was less warm than it had been for her but I craved the opportunity to do this for her. I loved the feel of her hair against my fingers, to let the strands just fall through the spaces. I brushed her hair for an extra long time and then bid her to sleep in my bed tonight. As usual, she insisted that it was not her place and I that her place was at my side. It had become a traditional and playful argument between us: where she would sleep. More often than not I prevailed and I hoped that in those cases, her actual intent was to sleep in my arms just as it was always my wish. I knew that she was bound by her position to lobby for her meager mattress but I was bound by my love for her to dissuade her. That night I held her especially fiercely. Just the thought of Dani taking those marks was enough to fill my eyes with tears for her tender skin.

Not long after Donnie and his servant took their marks, I had been attending a magical lesson with Melanie. Faith and Anne were free from this lesson because they were attending a gown fitting for the upcoming celebration and Donnie and his man rode by, waving a greeting. I watched them and then turned to Melanie commenting that the marks seemed very well done and powerful.

At first her reaction had been that the marks were indeed well done. Then she narrowed her eyes slightly and asked me what I meant by powerful. I explained the impression I had of the static current between the marks and then described similar connections between herself and D'elam, father and D'rek, and others at the wedding. Apparently this was a great discovery for she quickly called D'elam over and they whispered for a few moments. We continued with our lesson and within the afternoon, T'solde galloped up on her horse.

As it turned out, my ability to feel the connection between marks was an indicator of an ability to create them. We already knew that I had a fondness for art as it was the activity I used to fill much of my free time when I did not have studies or other responsibilities. However, no one had expected me to have this unusual potential. T'solde gave me a few quick tests before declaring that we would have to take a journey to the marks-artist. Everyone cluck-clucked that it was too bad we hadn't realized this earlier since the marks-artist had just been to the estate fifteen days earlier to create and bind D'le's (Donnie's servant's) marks.

Nonetheless, a message was sent to Miss T'dre the artist who had bound Donnie and his man as well as most of the other nobles we knew. She responded immediately that she would be out to visit and examine me two days hence.

The next two days were spent verily scrubbing myself inside and out. T'solde stayed at our estate and she and Melanie drilled me on magical theory every waking minute while Dani and D'elam prepared my wardrobe, skin, and hair for the visit. At night I fell into bed without even the energy to cajole my lovely girl in with me. She must have known how overwhelmed I was and taken pity on me for each morning although I woke alone, I could feel her heat still on the sheets just next to me.

T'dre arrived at mid-day and was welcomed into the castle by father himself. She accepted the formal greetings and then requested that she and I walk by ourselves. The walk seemed almost like a dream. We visited the gardens and stables and much of the grounds as she asked me questions about myself, my family, my horse, my intended servant, and my interests. I performed magic both by myself and jointly with her and stopped to draw pictures in the sand or on a small roll of paper she pulled from her pocket. By the time we had finished, I looked up to notice that it was growing dark about.

"My girl will be worried about me."

T'dre looked at me. "It is lovely to have someone who cares about you so much. Please tell me about her."

And so for a long hour or more, I went on about Dani's beauty, her intelligence, her laugh, everything I loved so about her. When I finished we had arrived at the castle to find the lamps burning brightly and the table set but the house waiting dinner on us. We sat down and shared our banquet in relative silence. When she had finished eating, T'dre simply said that she would train me. She made no promises but allowed that my potential was strong. My father, Melanie, and T'solde all looked very pleased when they embraced me and Faith whispered that I was a "hot dog" whatever that meant.

And so I began an apprenticeship in mark artistry or just artistry. Faith teased me about my studies saying that she was also going to be a marks-woman if she had her way. It was a weak joke but she made her point.

For the first fourteen to eighteen moons of my apprenticeship, my entire study was academic. Tadre (for she quickly asked me to use her name rather than title) visited once a seven-day to deliver scrolls with marks symbols listed. I was expected to study and memorize the symbols and practice drawing them until I could reproduce them quite literally with my eyes shut with pen on scroll. Once I could reproduce them perfectly with my eyes shut, I would be required to draw the mark with my left hand and then with my left hand but my eyes shut. Each of these attempts was tested by Tadre and she was a strict but kind teacher. She would not allow any imperfection but she was very clear and gentle in explaining where my reproduction deviated from the sample she had provided. When she came to test me, she did not show me the scrolls but would say the nature of a binding or a family name and expect me to produce the correct mark.

Dani was, of course, invaluable in my studies. While her artistic ability was, shall we say, less than ideal, her memorization skills allowed her to quickly digest the information and test and retest me wherever we may be: whether in my rooms or out on a ride. Her quick mind allowed her to see thematic connections between similar symbols that were not immediately obvious to me. I once asked her how she learned them so quickly and she seemed almost embarrassed to explain that when she had seen something even once, she retained a sort of mental image forever.

I don't mean to make it seem that my education was put on hold for the sake of my artistry. If anything, my education intensified in all areas. I now studied or spoke Latin, Greek, French, and Slavic, memorized Astronomy and the movement of the stars and planets, Geometry, Oration, Agricultural planning, deportment, dancing, needlework, diplomacy, and, of course, magical application. While all of these subjects had varying intensity and difficulty, by far the most difficult was Geometry and later Trigonometry. But for Dani's repeated and painstaking instruction, I don't know that I ever would have been able to produce acceptable examinations in these subjects.

By the time I neared my fourteenth summer, Tadre allowed that my knowledge of marks and my ability to reproduce them were acceptable to accompany her and learn the actual application and binding of the marks. Not until I went with her, did I start to understand my chosen and gifted craft. Artistry is about knowing the correct symbols and being able to reproduce them as well as being able to create truly beautiful art but it is also about the strength and purity the artist puts into the mark. Every mark. Every mark requires a magical bond. Whether it is a mark declaring a noble man or woman to have achieved maturity, a free joining marriage bond, a servant bond, or the very rare freed-servant bond, the mark must have a very specific and delicate yet powerful piece of magic within it.

The first mark artistry I attended was the binding of a one mark servant to the second cousin of the Lord of a neighboring estate. The noble woman was fifth of seven daughters with no magic among her or her siblings and none in either parent's line. In other words, this mark would not be terribly elaborate. It would still contain the basic anchors to bind the servant and her mistress together but the design was fairly basic. After she had completed the noble woman's mark design, Tadre had brought me the scroll and asked me to dissect it for her, which I had done thoroughly and repeatedly. When asked, I could reproduce the design with my eyes closed and with either hand. Tadre asked me to explain in great detail about the anchors she had placed in the design. These spots were placed into the original marks of a noble man or woman. Later when his or her servant was bound or when the joining marks were created, the anchors would be used to "tie" the servant to the binding or the pair to each other.

I do not know if my initial reaction upon attending an artistry would have been different had I attended the noble woman's binding rather than her servant's first. Our marks, as I've explained before, are placed on our palms-right palm for a woman and left palm for a man. The joining marks are created on the backs of our hands even extending up the forearm if necessary. As you might imagine, in spite of the joy of the ceremony and the preparation we have undergone, the application of marks to one's hands-hands filled with bones and sensitive nerves is quite painful. The elaboration of a set of marks is notable and impressive not only because it indicates the wealth and prestige associated with a family, but because it is such an ordeal. Another reason that the elaboration of marks is impressive is that any noble family of worth will supply the artist and receiver with adequate healing and herbal medicine to make the taking of the marks palatable. Without the numbing herbs-usually an herb called Opiaum-I believe most people could not accept the marks on their hands.

No servant ever receives his or her marks simultaneous to his master so that he can care for the master (or mistress) throughout the recovery period. While the nobility's prestige is enhanced by the elaboration of his marks, it is also enhanced by realizing that any servant bonded to that person will have equal marks on his or her hip. This marking, on the hip, is done without the aid of a healer or herbs. Although the hip is a more forgiving surface to the hot vibrating needle, it is by no means a pleasant experience for the servant. Servants are respected for their ability to withstand the artistry in devotion to their mark-master. That first artistry I attended was shocking. The servant was very good at withstanding the pain and did not scream, but she did cry as her mistress held her.

So when Melanie came to me every four or six moons after the initial visit, I continued to delay the taking of my marks. I had no fear for myself, for my family had an excellent healer living on our estate. But I couldn't stand the thought of Dani hurt so badly. One of the first assignments Tadre had given me once I had finished my memorization was to design my own marks. It was a project she had returned to over and over ever since. I knew that the marks would be extensive and elaborate-more elaborate than any I had ever seen before nor that Tadre had created.

After each visit from Melanie, Dani would respectfully ask me about my marks and I responded each time by telling her that I was not ready. She did not question me further but I wondered if she had an inkling of why I was so reticent. When I had sixteen summers, this conversation altered. Dani began to urge me to take the marks, to trust that she would serve me well and make me proud. It was her voice but I could hear D'elam and thus Melanie's words passing through her mouth.

The following winter I received a visit from Faith. She no longer seemed my baby sister. With fifteen summers behind her she had been released from her academic studies after receiving adequate marks in all subjects. Her love remained the out of doors, gamesmanship, riding, hunting, and she now headed all hunting expeditions initiated by our estate. Our region was quite peaceful at this time but I occasionally heard murmurings of her fitness for military lead. Either position- gameswoman or military leader – was unusual for a noble woman but my family had great prestige and respect and my father was always very liberal in his thinking. Additionally, she was the third daughter in our family. Pressure was not so intense on her as on myself or Donnie or even Anne.

She came in one afternoon as I was working on my mark design for perhaps the thirtieth time based on feedback from Tadre. Dani was out on a long ride which I have to suspect Faith knew, given that she was Dani's most frequent riding partner besides myself. She knocked and at my invite came in taking a seat on the other side of the table. She waited until I had stopped drawing and replaced my quill in the holder before indicating the paper with her hand. "May I?" I nodded and she took the paper and studied it for a few minutes. "Those are going to be really something, T."

"I don't think that's the final product. Tadre will want to make some adjustments," I explained.

"Have you designed mine yet? Or Anne's?"

I reached into the drawer in my desk and pulled out two very similar scrolls and handed them to her. She looked them over and smiled. "I think I can live with my three marks. You've done a really fantastic job on these."

"Thank you, Faith." I looked at her for a long minute. "Is there a reason for your visit?"

She placed her hand over her heart in mock indignation and hurt. "What? I can't just visit my big sister to hear her witty repartee and see her unending beauty?"

"Seems unlikely."

Faith laughed. "See, witty repartee." I leaned back in my chair and folded my hands across my chest. "Ok. I'm not here for your witty repartee."

I feigned shock at the revelation, again earning a laugh from my sister.

"The estate awaits the taking of your marks, Miss T'ra." She spoke in a surprisingly formal fashion and I wondered whether it was Melanie or father who had sent her.

"I don't feel that I'm ready." I picked up my quill and pulled the scroll toward me as if dismissing her and ending the conversation.

Faith leaned forward and pulled my hand from the scroll and held it in her own. "Tara, there's never been a better prepared Lady. You'll bring all the respect and devotion and love to this family that you could. You know it." She tilted her head. "Are you afraid of the pain? Because the healer stands ready to apply the herbs." She waited a moment after which I did not answer. "Donnie says it didn't hurt that badly when he kept thinking of the honor of his marks and his are almost as elaborate as yours."

I stood and stepped a few steps from the desk. "I don't understand w-why no one will believe that I am not ready."

Faith allowed me to pace for a few seconds before she also stood and stepped directly in front of me. She reached up to tuck an errant strand of hair behind my ear and placed her hands on my shoulders. "Is it Dani?" I flinched, unaware and unsuspecting of her perceptivity. She took that as an admission. "Is…is it that you don't want her hurt?"

Tears sprung to my eyes. I slowly nodded as did Faith.

She stroked my cheek. "I understand." She swallowed audibly. "But people are starting to think that you doubt her. That you doubt her strength and devotion to you."

"Wh-what? That's…That's j-just ridiculous. Who thinks that? Who…"

She interrupted me to drive home the dagger. "She thinks it too, Miss Tara."

I reached backwards and found that I was standing by the bed onto which I collapsed. "She thinks? But I would never. I mean. She's…I mean. She's not afraid and I know she…" I leaned forward putting my face into my hands then looked back up. "She really thinks that?"

Faith kneeled down in front of me. "She doesn't know what to think. You're obviously ready and she believes she is too but you keep delaying."

"Father? Melanie?" I could feel my heart pounding. "Do they think that I doubt her? They know she's, that she's perfect? Right? Don't they?"

Faith stroked my hair for a few minutes as I tried to comprehend this misconception. This thought of weakness in my girl. "I can explain to father but everyone else…," she offered

I wiped my eyes and lifted my head. "I will speak to Lord Maclay at his earliest opportunity about the taking of my marks."

Faith nodded. Then she gently kissed each of my cheeks. "She'll be fine and we'll all spoil her crazy."

I gulped and nodded. "I know."

She glanced to my windowpane. "I should get out there for a ride before mother goes hunting down her 'wild child.'"

Before she left the room, I called after her. "Thank you for talking to me, Faith."

She smiled. "Of course, Tara."

That night at dinner I could hardly eat. I kept one eye sideways trained on Dani, attempting to spot her insecurity. Did she truly think that I wasn't proud of her? That I doubted her? How could she not know how I cared for her? How I felt about her? The rest of the time I spent stealing glances at the rest of the diners. We had visitors as we did nearly every evening but it seemed unusually quiet around the table to me. "Lord Maclay, I would appreciate the opportunity to speak with you at your convenience." My formal words sounded foreign in my ear.

My father was nothing if not a consummate statesman. "Yes, Miss Tara," he nodded only once. "We shall speak after dinner."

A few hours later, our visitors had left the estate when D'rek came to get me. I walked back to father's rooms with him and was bowed inside before the door shut tightly. My father sat at his large desk and put away his pen the moment I entered. "Lord Maclay, thank you for seeing me." I bowed formally.

My father extended his left hand to show his marks and bowed in return. "Miss Tara. Please take a seat."

I did so next to his desk and he returned to his chair. I extended the scroll with my latest efforts on it. "If your Lordship deems it appropriate, I am ready to take my marks. The artist does not feel that this is a complete representation but she approves of the basic design."

My father took the scroll and studied it for a few moments, holding it next to his hand to compare the designs. Then he set it on the desk and smiled, leaning forward to take my hands in his. "Tara. The design is beautiful and shows the honor of our house as well as the memory of your mother, Lady Maclay. I will be proud to see you take your marks and become Lady of this house." It was obviously not an afterthought yet he waited a heartbeat before adding, "And your Dani will do this house and your Ladyship great honor when she is bonded. You two are a wonderful and beautiful pair."

I looked away briefly. "Yes, Lord Maclay. Dani looks forward to our bonding."

My father poured me a small cup of tea and placed a sweet stick into it, stirring twice before handing me the cup. "Tara. You have concerns about Dani?"

I felt relieved that we were entering a more informal conversation. "Concerns for her, Father. Not about her. I know that she is completely devoted and I could never ask for a better partner."

"What then?"

I took a deep breath. "I don't like the idea of her being hurt. I know the marking hurts and servants are not given any herbs. I…I just…"

My father nodded. "Yes. I understand." He took the tea and set it on the table before taking my hands again. "I do not believe that the marking process is easy for our servants but their pain is part of what binds them to us and gives us pride. I am sorry that it will hurt Dani and that it will hurt you through her." He looked around the room. "I must confess that I had similar concerns about Derek but he has now taken marks three times with me and reports that the pride outweighs the pain." I nodded but apparently I didn't look relieved. "There is something else?"

I looked away and bit my lip slightly. My father easily picked me up and put me in his lap like a small child, wrapping his arms around my waist. "There. Now you can tell me what is bothering you without having to look into my eyes."

I felt like the words were lodged in my throat. I could feel tears in my eyes and wanted to avoid saying this. "I'm not just afraid for her for the mark pain. I…the marks-rights…." Before she had taken her marks, Dani had existed, like myself, in a sort of protected adolescence. It was unheard of, literally unheard of, for an adult man to avail himself of a girl before her marks were bestowed on her. But once she had her marks…

My father tensed slightly in his chair. Then he relaxed and began to brush my hair with his hands. "My darling child, your servant will have five marks. I think of her as my child and can vow that I will never take marks-rights with her." He half-whispered, "And your uncle, Lord M'rtin's interests run more to the…Well you can discard any concern for his interest." He spoke of T'solde's husband here and I wondered briefly what he meant of the Lord's interests.

I was quiet for a few moments, enjoying the softness of his hands comforting me. "Thank you."

My father pushed me gently into a standing position and stood himself. "We shall schedule your marks taking and ceremony for this summer. Please let T'dre know that I wish to speak to her when she is here next."

I bowed deeply. "Yes, Lord Maclay. Thank you for your patience." He returned the bow, indicating that I was free to leave my audience.

I was only a few steps from the door when I heard his voice once again. "Tara." I turned around to see him looking at me kindly. "Dani is young but there may come a time when she will enjoy sharing marks- rights and your status will ensure her of quality and breeding in eligible mates."

I nodded over the lump forming in my throat and took my leave.

My marks artistry was scheduled for the day of the summer equinox. Dani's would be two weeks later and the celebration two weeks later still. While the estate prepared for the celebration banquet, I prepared spiritually for my marks. Each day was spent in quiet reflection, writing, drawing, or praying. Tadre informed me that once I had taken my marks I would be ready to artist marks up to 3rd level without her accompaniment. I had assisted her on thirty or forty artistries but I had no idea that she thought this much of my training progress. The last week before my marks Tadre stayed at the estate, working or praying with me for hours a day.

Dani and I continued our playful debate over where she slept but it had been summers and moons besides since she had won the debate. Usually I held her throughout the night, wrapping my arms around her tiny but powerful body and kissing the most tender places on her neck and hair. This week she clung to me like a drowning man to a scrap of wood, her hands pressed to my flat stomach and her breath tickling my ears. A few times I woke in the night to imagine I felt or heard her crying but each time I was too deeply in sleep to ask her about it. When I woke, I asked her about it but she insisted I was dreaming and carried on with her morning duties but each day I knew I felt he impression of her lips on my neck and shoulders like never before.

On the day of my marks, I woke to find Dani already arisen and gone from my rooms. Tadre came in shortly after I had washed and begun to dress and informed me that we would be bathing in the stream. She bid me come to the banquet hall dressed as I was and I did so. Assembled in the hall were my father, Melanie, my siblings, T'solde and representatives of her estate, and servants-in short the entire estate. My eyes watered at the looks on their faces and shockingly, Anne was the first to reach me to wrap me in a hug. "Good morning, Lady Maclay." I looked strangely at her before remembering that the day of marks, a